to think if you're offered a lift, the driver gets to decide when you leave?

[Chulita]

My parents have offered my brother and sil a lift to a wedding (4 hours' drive away). They discovered after offering that my brother is invited to the reception whereas they're only invited to the wedding ceremony. Dad has said that they'll be leaving after the ceremony so if brother/sil would still like a lift, they'll miss the reception, otherwise they could drive themselves down. My brother's making a fuss cos he expects them to wait around til the reception's finished so they can get a lift back with them. He reckons if you make an offer you should stick to it regardless, I thought that if you're accepting a favour you take what you're given.
He thinks that all his friends would be more than happy to wait around and if the boot were on the other foot he'd apparently be happy to wait for a few hours. He's so adamant that my parents are being unreasonable that I'm now wondering whether I'm just a selfish cow.I wouldn't want to potter around a city for hours waiting for my liftees to finish partying so I could go home, but aibu?

Parents are not friends!
Doesn't he know that?

If they are staying longer they should be offering a lift to your parents and let them decide whether to take it and wait or not. Not the other way around.

Of course YANBU. How can he expect your parents to wait around for what would probably be more than a couple of hours and then drive two snoring people home? Well done your parents for not giving in.

Well, if his friends don't mind waiting around for hours to give him a lift, isn't the solution obvious? He can whistle up a friend instead of imposing on his parents.

your parents should go to the wedding, ditch your brother, and go on to spend the night at a nice little hotel somewhere, together. dinner, maybe a walk by the sea if there is any to be had.

I agree that if you're giving someone a lift, you should decide when you take them back. However, if there is a specific reason they need to go back (i.e. they are ill, their kids arrive back soon etc) then I can understand why they would ask you to take them back earlier. But they should tell you beforehand that you're sorry to be an inconvinience but is it possible to be dropped off earlier because the delivery man is coming or your children are arriving home etc. Obviously if you're feeling ill, that will happen at the time and is obvious why you want to go home.

But in general if someone is just being demanding and controlling, I believe YANBU.

Brother is being unreasonable. If brother were to offer to pay for your Dad to have a a meal out in some nice restaurant while they wait, that could be ok. Other wise they have no reason to stay really and so the return journey should really suit Dad time wise.

I wouldn't do a 4 hour drive to see someone get married, when I hadn't been invited to the reception... If I was in your parent's position, I'd cancel the trip completely and leave your Db to his own devices.

Your brother is being selfish, entitled and pathetic.

Agree with floggingmolly. An 8 hour return trip just for the ceremony?! I'd send a card!