To just loathe 'parenting' websites containing stuff like this

[designerbaby]

positive parenting promise

FFS. I'm fed up with people thinking they've 'reinvented parenting' by either stating the bleeding obvious or setting completely unfeasible, ridiculous 'rules'.

This one I find particularly offensive because it succeed in doing both.

MY parenting promise:

1. Have fun
2. Cuddle lots
3. Try not to kill them

I just LOATHE this kind of stuff and all who peddle it.

Go on. Do your worst.

db
xx

YANBU. It made me want to vomit.

On your side here, promise to my kids is that I'll also do my best not to poison them or kill them in some sort of stupid way! Yanbu!

yanbu

my parent promise:

1. feed you 2)clothe you 3)love you 4)embarrass you 5)make you wear dumbarse fancy dress outfits because I think theyre cute 6)make you eat stuff that you dont like 7)not buy you things just because everyone elses mums and dads did.

It is a bit vomit inducing!

I promise I will try to change your nappy before it reaches your knees

I promise you ds1 if you take one more of my m+m when I leave the room you will lose your arm.

I promise you ds2 I wont forget you at the park again

i promise to not cut of your toes when i hold you in a half nelson to trim your toe nails you have not allowed me to cut for weeks. I also promise not to poison you and try not to swear infront of you so you utter "jesus christ" at grandma

That totally makes me want to vomit!

Load of old crap!

YADNBU.

I promise to give you a hard time about brushing your teeth, crossing the road, saying please and thank you, and picking up your own dirty clothes.

I promise that you will really want to leave home at 18, and I will do my best to give you enough skills to be able to do so without your life crashing around your ears.

I just realsed that mine needed one more to complete and irrefutable:

DB's parenting promise:

1. Have fun
2. Cuddle lots 3) Try not to be a dick
3. Try not to kill them

[bows]

db
xx

joanofarchitrave
My sentiments EXACTLY.
Bravo.

I've just yelled at mine, and told them they're selfish and horrible. They are all teenagers, they haven't done any of their jobs and I am in plaster from thumb to below wrist.
So, positive parenting can fuck right off at the minute.

That is the sort of thing that makes me puke normally but I suppose it is useful for those who had shit/abusive parents themselves.

I'm v sceptical about this sort of stuff - I felt I was a bit draconian with DD1, she is a lovely young lady now (19yo) but as a child a used to think I'd stifled some creativity, as I was always telling her what to do/how to do it/being quite strict and she always was a bit quiet, never questioned anything. I was more relaxed with DD2 and encouraged her to question, and express her creativity, and was much less harsh with her. She is a 9yo little shit and frustrates me every day.

Dear Ds,

My parenting promise,

I promise to raise so that you will not be a burden to your future partner.

I promise to reflect,learn and try again whenI loose my way.....

And not keep saying nasty words/sentences beginig with "Fing hell or bly H**l when i take a wrong turning...get lost ...and forget where I am ! and scream at you to be quiet in the back because it is all your fault I missed the turning..

(Note to self ..either i need sat nav or therapy !)

Designerbaby........I was wondering about the teenage aspect too. Bet theperson writing that crap has never had to deal with slatternly, eye rolling, tutting teenagers who would sneer openly at the term inner peace

"Peace and Be Well" Vomit vomit vomit vomit vomit vomvomvom.

My promise is simple.

Dear DCs,

I promise that I won't deliberately fuck you up, but I'm careless, so it may happen anyway. If it does, FFS rebel against me and become a corporate accountant.

Yours,

Babyheave.

Can't even be arsed to read the whole thing. It's the kind of thing that people forward to me and I delete straight away.
Vom indeed.

I think I'll go for
I promise to be your parent. I can see round corners, through walls, and read your mind, and will act accordingly to stop you from ever getting a Darwin Award or going to jail.
I will instill in you a sense of responsibility so that when I am old you will smother me before I smell of cat.

I promise to stop robbing money from your piggy bank to pay the window cleaner.

And the paperboy too

PomBear, I would just add "...or piss" but apart from that, my sentiments exactly!