pictures of ur children on facebook?

[mummy349]

I was walking through the park earlier when I was stoppeed by a random person who said 'oh this must be harry, wow hasnt he grown up so much' to which I just stared at her amazed....i had never seen this women in my life
sensing my confusion she went oh sorry I didnt mean to scare u I have ur MIL on facebook so ive seen photos of him.
I asked a friend to show me the photos (im not in facebook) and it turns out there r hundreds on pictures of my ds on there, and her profile is not set to private which if im right means just anyone can c them?
now in these photos r at least 50 of me in labour/)iterally just given birth and also ones of ds in just a nappy.
aibu in not being very happy about this? I understand she is a doting gm who wants to show him off, but surely I should have been asked permission for these pictures to have been put on there, especially if its open to anyone, meaning anyone can c them?

YANBU. She should have asked, especially if there are pictures of you having just given birth

Ask her to either remove them, or change her privacy settings.

Yes.

But you can email facebook and have them removed.

Then ban MIL from taking pictures.

Unless your kids are naked what is the problem verity?

For what it's worth OP YANBU

I wouldn't post another person's child's photo on the internet without asking their permission.

Thanx everyone, if I ask her to put her profile to private, that means that noone but people she knows can c the pictures? I am so bad with technology u wouldnt belive im on 24
I guess im just more annoyed that she didnt ask me, I grin and bear that she sends pictures to family members I have never met, but I thought this was taking the piss just a little bit

Does she know about the privacy settings? I woukd ask her to tighten them up. Surely she will!

YANBU, but I'm very curious why anybody would take photos of you when you were in labour .

I'd find that really creepy, but trying to control anything on the net is like trying to hold water.

But that doesn't mean you have to put up with it if it's making you feel uncomfortable, you need to talk to your MIL and say what happened and how freaked out you are by it.

My dad put a piccy of us on his fb page of just after DD2 was born, but it was only one, and we knew it was being taken - big difference between that and you and your baby in a most intimate and private time unaware of them being publicly available to all/sundry.

How do you think your MIL would take it if you said anything? You sound as though you're open to the reasons why she did it rather than just a general steaming in telling her off kind of thing.

I'd find out how many "friends" she has and if you're comfortable with that number of people seeing these pics ask her to change her security settings so that friends only can see them. Having them public is just not on at all, especially without permission. I made my mother do this recently (my settings were already private) after an ex stalker of mine (pretty nasty stuff, police involved etc) had contacted her on FB and had obviously gone through all her pics and seen my DD. Spine chilling stuff.

Im not sure she would understand why im annoyed if im honest, she sees my mum as competition iyswim, so whenever I say I dont like something she is never very happy and thinks im trying to 'push her out' but seriously I really dont apreticate pictures of me in my most vunerable state and my newborn baby boy being posted all over facebook for just anyone to see.
I have no idea why she took photos of me in labour, at the time I had no idea she had done it, which makes me even more uncomfortable with the situation

im going to ask her in the morning to remove them I think, if she doesnt what can I do? Op u said I can report the pictures, how do I do this and can I do it if im not on faceboook?

I think it pays to be a little paranoid when it comes to real life and the internet coming together verity, it means something different to being paranoid in real life because the possibilities are less limited as to what could happen.

Bloody hell - she took photos of you when you were in labour, without your consent??? That is beyond bizarre/intrusive. For most people, that's a really private time.

Sorry I can't offer you any help on how to get them removed, but good luck and hopefully somebody a bit more knowledgeable can help you.

www.facebook.com/help/?page=204546626249212

You need to 'help' her understand why this means so much to you, how the random coming up to you in the park made you feel (although that could feasibly happen just in real life, someone seeing you with your MIL and knowing you know her, but it's the intimacy (and at her taking the piccys without asking) that makes the difference).

She might not be bothered by it happening to her, but she shouldn't devalue how you feel.

Are there any other options apart from going down the fb official route if she won't take them down? Because that might affect your relationship for a long time. Your DH or her DH having a word maybe?

Thanx msvestibule, least im nota lone in thinking it was intrusive, I would b less annoyed about it if she had shown me/given me copies of the pictures instead of posting them all over the internet! On one of the comments someone (again someone I have never met) has said 'oh she doesnt look happy, everything go ok'
if I had facebook I would write back, yes everything is ok, but ive just pushed a baby out, been through hous of painful labour and the midwife is still currently removing my placenta, so excuse me if I dont look my best but im fucking exhausted! Argh, sorry people im very pissed of :-)

Thanx msvestibule, least im nota lone in thinking it was intrusive, I would b less annoyed about it if she had shown me/given me copies of the pictures instead of posting them all over the internet! On one of the comments someone (again someone I have never met) has said 'oh she doesnt look happy, everything go ok'
if I had facebook I would write back, yes everything is ok, but ive just pushed a baby out, been through hous of painful labour and the midwife is still currently removing my placenta, so excuse me if I dont look my best but im fucking exhausted! Argh, sorry people im very pissed of :-)

Oops didnt mean to post that twice, and apologies for the terrible spelling im on a phone with teeny tiny keypad and I am useless with technology :-)

Actually what she has done is shocking, I'd demand that she removes them all, straight away, and make sure your dp backs you up. Disgraceful behaviour.

She knows full well what she's done is wrong, she'd have had to tick a box that says she has permission to post those pics. She's ticked it without permission.

why do people think strangers are going to see or care that there are pictures of other people. And why do peopl care that other people may see an image of themselves or their children.

people dont hide themselves or their kids away when they are out and about with peopl looking at them.

But even with the profile settings, with the choice of them being private/public, surely she should have asked me, coz I would have told her no. I dont feel comfortable with alot of the pictures being there, I dont mind some of them, the ones where he iss fully dressed, and ones of me when I am not in labour/giving birth, I just wished she had asked me.
she doesnt seem to respect my privicy at all if im honest, she had random people come over to see the baby at my house withing days of me having him, so I doubt she will do anything if I ask. Is there anyway of removing them if she refuses?

I definately think that labour pictures posted on the internet is too far.

And no offence meant (am sure you looked great during labour) but why would anyone other than your partner want to see you during it? Is a weird thing to take pictures of, let alone post them for the world to see.

Minimisscheif, its not about me caring about people seeing an image of me or ds, its just that I was giving birth and im upset that she thinks its ok put it on the internet without asking