to be upset at ds being dumped by friend?

[Fossil]

For the past two years ds (9) and friend have been joined at the hip. Then one day at half term, out of the blue, friend started playing with boy over the road who ds doesn't get on with, partly because said kid has always been quite hostile towards ds. Since then friend has been over there for a sleepover, and they play outside this kid's house in full view of ds, but friend no longer calls on ds. DS insists "it's fine", and dh says I'm making a fuss about nothing and "kids do this" (he has had kids before), but I feel like going over there and punching their lights out. I want to cry, and last night I was awake from 4.30 a.m. thinking about it. I just feel so upset on behalf of DS. AIBU?

In a word, yes.
I know it's hard to just stand by while your precious DC "suffers" but honestly, children have ways of working these things out, and as long as the others aren't actually bullying/being mean to/taunting your DS, stand back and let it go. This will happen again, and again, and again...

Tough on your DS, but yes, kids do this and so do teenagers, and so too do adults, but they are (usually) more subtle about it.

YAB very U to think about punching their lights out.

YANBU to be sad that your child is going through this.

YABU to be obsessing about it - it's all part of growing up, and they have to negotiate their own friendships.
As long as the other boys aren't bullying your son, you just have to let the friendships run their natural course.

He'll find another friend soon enough.

It's horrible to watch though, so I do feel for you.

I agree with pinkpyjamas.

We've been through it, your heart could break for them, but you just need to encourage other friendships. Invite another friend round of ds's choice.

Has ds got other friends? Yabu and Yanbu...it IS hard....when kids have one special friend to the exclusion of others, this often happens when they get to 9 or 10 and begin to grow a little.

Encourage DS to find other kids to play with...maybe ask someone from school over.

People make other friendships and move on in life.

It's a valuable lesson for him, and he sounds like he is handling it a lot better than you are.

Be upset for him by all means, but lying awake from 4.30am fretting about it is a tad dramatic.

He will make new friends, as you do in life. And if his ex friend finds it so easy to ditch him, he is better off as he is now.

yabu, wanting to punch a Childs light out, really?
These things happen. Encourage as to make more friends.
You can't force a child to be friends with your child. Its awful to see your child sad, but he is dealing with it in a more adult way.

Encourage ds not 'as'.

Probably the punching lights out bit was an unfortunatel choice of words. Sorry if its upset anyone, of course I wouldn't do such thing, but then you don't know me, I'm quite sane really. Good night everyone.

I feel for you. Could your DS join a new club? Invite his other friends over for tea? I feel this is more about you than your DS. Maybe this has triggered memories from your own past?

I feel for you, it's awful.

This happened with dd a few months ago. Her best friend and her two other close friends fell out with her over an argument over pegs in the cloakroom. I thought they'd sort it but it's obvious now they won't as this was at Easter. They've been quite nasty to be honest, telling her to go away, telling her she can't play with them, turning their backs on her, etc.

Dd has made new friends now. I don't think they're as close as her old group but they seem to be getting on ok. She was sad for a long time about her old friends but seems better now.

She's starting secondary school in sept and I'm looking forward to her meeting and mixing with a bigger group.