To be annoyed that ex BF won't return expensive boxset

[ComeonAndy]

I was seeing a guy for a few months. All going well. I bought an expensive DVD boxset for us to watch which I left at his apartment.

Two weeks later he broke up with me out of the blue (he took a lot of drugs and I think he finished with me on a drugs comedown - yes, I know; bit of a catch). I asked if he could post the boxset back to me and he said he would (he doesn't live that near). Two months later, he still hadn't so I posted him a stamped, addressed jiffy bag so he could return it easily. I couldn't have made it easier other than driving there myself and putting it in the bag for him and putting it in a postbox!

That was 2 weeks ago and I still haven't had it.

I know I should let it go but it's really annoying especially as it cost me a lot of money! He didn't treat me very well so I think it's the least he could bloody well do!

I'm really pissed off, partly because I just want to cut ties with him and waiting for him to return this is keeping me connected to him.

AIBU?

I have an ex's CD of The Magic Flute (full version) and his x2 converter for a SLR camera. Fills me with guilt every time I see them. Time's moved on, though (20 years), and I'm not likely to return them now.

Let the box-set, and the ex, go.

My solicitor told me once about being instructed to send a letter which cost the client £40 to ask for the return of an £8 Simply Red cd. Solicitor said he'd buy her the CD rather than send the letter but she insisted.

You remind me of her a bit. You've lost sight of the wood for the trees...or something. Just thank your lucky stars you are not longer humping seeing a druggy.

I hope he doesn't think I want to get back together because I don't - he hurt me too much.

I lost a holiday when I kicked the previous EA ex out. But I didn't care about that. I just wanted rid of him.

I don't know why this is bothering me so much. I think I don't want him having anything of mine. I suspect he's got back together with his ex now and I don't want them watching something of mine. I never would have left it if I'd known he was going to finish it. I don't think he was expecting to finish it either but that's what a drugs comedown does for you...

You remind me of what I was like with my druggy ex.

For your own sake and sanity, forget the DVD and him. Move on.

In what way Whitewidow? And any tips for getting over him?!

Jus with the thins you're saying, and it seems you would like to get back with him. I used to make excuses like I WANT MY SHOES BACK or whatever without realising that it was to keep a connection. What was worse is that I didn't want him, I just didn't want anyone else having him. Weird I know!

I can't give you any tips but all I can say it please don't. It never gets any better. I was with my ex from being 16 and he ruined my life. Drugs will always come first. Especially when it's 'ohh it's only a line love' and it ends up being much more than that, to the point of stealing money, 'forgetting' birthdays, selling your things and the massive one: cheating when they're 'off it'. That comes with the cliche phrase ' I didnt know what I was doing'.

Thanks Whitewidow. Sorry to hear about your experiences and thanks for sharing. I think mine may have gone back to his ex and I really don't want to know. He said that he wanted to be friends and I said no. No contact is what I want (well, what I need).

I honestly don't want him back because he really hurt me. Led me on then finished with me out of the blue. It just annoys me that he is benefitting from something I bought & that he said he would return to me. I left it at his and he finished with me only a few days later.

It will annoy you, I used to be close to tears with anger because I'd left something there. But it wasn't that it was overly arsed about the item, it's the fact HE had it.
You just have to forget it, think of it as a small price to pay to get rid of the fuckwit.

I can share my experiences because if they hadn't of happened, I wouldn't be with the amazing person I am now. :o cringe alert hahshs.

Hope you stay well away and get over him, I'd never go back to someone who'd finished with me for nothing. You're worth more than that :)

But it wasn't that it was overly arsed about the item, it's the fact HE had it.

Yes - that's it....I don't want him to have anything of mine. I bought it for us to watch together and he asked me to leave it at his. If I'd had any idea that that would have been the last time I saw him again I wouldn't have left it. When he finished with me, I asked him to post it back and he said he would and then couldn't be bothered.

...think of it as a small price to pay to get rid of the fuckwit.
I know that's how I should think of it but I didn't actually want to get rid of him....Stupid, I know. That's why it helps to hear your experiences because it will reinforce to me that I'm better off without him (which is what I have to keep telling myself otherwise I won't ever get over him).

Glad to hear that you're with someone much better now.