Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

snippy bossy sil and unsupportive DH

29 replies

Shelly32 · 24/06/2012 21:13

DH sis has always been highly strung and hard to get on with. She has strong opinions (so do I) and I'd like to get on with her but find that we rub each other up the wrong way on almost every occasion. I have twins. Just afterthey were born, she confronted me and said that she felt 'I thought she had it easy' She has three boys (her choice ) and is a SAHM. I never thought that and never voiced that. I felt she was trying to put me in my place for some reason.. God knows why. We've clashed on a few occasions but I'm getting fed up with teh way my DH tries to say 'It's just women' He has always put up with her over bearing ways and I try and bite my tongue when she's bossy and snippy with him but can't seem to do it when she's like it with me.
Her dog crapped in someone else's graden the other day and I tried to keep my girls away from it. She did pick teh offending item up bt I still didn't want them playing near the area. She took real offense and snapped 'I've thrown it waay'. I snapped back but then she had the nerve to ask me why I snapped at her.. It sounds petty, I know but she's so odd and weird to be around. It's causing friction with me and DH, who takes her side. Maybe it's me..I don't know AIBU?

OP posts:
NarkedRaspberry · 25/06/2012 18:16

It's a bit like they were handed out family roles as children and they all accept that as normal. There's the quiet one, the drama queen, the bossy one, the baby ...

AThingInYourLife · 25/06/2012 18:39

I'm the eldest bossy-boots opinionated sister.

My DBro is the baby, so he has two big sisters with an opinion on everything he does. Plus an Irish mammy. Poor fucker :o

I think it helps that there are two of us to pull each other up when we're being way too big-sistery. Plus our SIL is assertive and fun, so we'd never get away with throwing our weight around.

It does sound a little like your DH has married someone like his big sister - not that you sound opinionated or awful, but that you two might share some qualities. :)

If he just refuses to get involved in criticising her over things like dog poo rows, then there's no need to feel hurt. I'm sure he wouldn't be any more interested in hearing her bitch about you.

LurkingAndLearningForNow · 25/06/2012 18:43

I think he should stand up for his wife. If my DP's brother treated me this way I'd be extremely hurt if he just wiped his hands and sad 'nahh, not my business.' Seems cowardly.

Shelly32 · 25/06/2012 19:50

lol , Yep, maybe we do have similarities. I admit I can be opinionated but also try not to cause trouble where there doesn't need to be any.
LurkingALFN I would like a bit more support. It's not that he takes her side, he just says nothing and puts it down to women having the ability to be catty. I think he's worried she'll raise hell if he gets involved and that something that is an issue between myself and SIl will turn into a family war. He is quite placid and peaceloving when sometimes I think I could do with a warrior!!

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page