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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that DH could have done this another evening? (warning PMS rated ranting level high)

19 replies

SconeInSixtySeconds · 22/06/2012 11:40

DH is currently working away in Perth, Western Australia. The DC and I are in Brisbane. He comes back for the weekend every other week (ie, we see him for 4 days a month).

I've missed him. It's been like this for 3 months and it's crap. I'm from the UK so I have no family of any kind here, and friends who are still at the pretty superficial stage as we've only lived here for just over a year.

We speak on the phone most evenings, although often too late to talk to the dc (Perth is 2 hours behind Brisbane, he's still at work when the dc go to bed, and thou shalt never contact him at work he's not obtainable by me in work hours.

So tonight (cos that's what it is here - 8.30pm) I schlep with the kids to the airport and he basically stumbles off the plane because he's drunk so much.

To the point that I had to hold onto him as he went up the up travelator as he was stumbling backwards. Very Blush

He's gone to bed. I'm sitting here in tears with my plans for catching up totally ruined. Ah yes. He's started snoring, and that means there is no point me going to bed tonight as he'll snore all night at a volume which is unbearable.

This is very self pitying of me isn't it. I'd just missed him and wished that he could have drunk his bodyweight in wine on a night when he was in Perth. Sad.

OP posts:
tryingtonotfeckup · 22/06/2012 11:42

YANBU, make him pay tomorrow.

Have some wine yourself. Wine

Cockwomble · 22/06/2012 11:43

I would be FUMING, and he'd be getting an ear bashing very loudly into his hungover ears the selfish twunt. no tolerance

Flobbadobs · 22/06/2012 11:43

Not self pitying at all! It was a twatty thing to do, god knows what he was thinking.
I would rip my DH a new one if he behaved like that!
YANBU xx

BatCave · 22/06/2012 11:44

Yanbu, get him up at the crack of dawn. And if you sleep downstairs, nick the duvet.

hermionestranger · 22/06/2012 11:44

I'd be fucking furious! Make sure that he gets no special treatment and load the kids with sugar! Grrr on your behalf.

fruitysummer · 22/06/2012 11:45

YANBU

Send the kids in first thing in the morning to wake him up and make sure he has a very busy day with them tomorrow. And that he takes you all out for a lovely meal somewhere.

Not self pitying, I'd be bloody livid.

PoppyWearer · 22/06/2012 11:45

He's taking the early shift with the DCs in the morning then! Whilst you have a lie-in or a nice soaky bath with a magazine, or a manicure....the possibilities are endless really!

ExitPursuedByABear · 22/06/2012 11:46

You have every right to be fuming. I would certainly be making him pay.

SconeInSixtySeconds · 22/06/2012 11:47

Thing is, I'm not even angry. I'm just really fucking hurt. And there is no way he'll be up early tomorrow. 6am when the kids get up is 4am Perth time (and he sticks to that as he'll be back there Sunday night).

OP posts:
Oogaballoo · 22/06/2012 12:34

I'm not surprised that you're so hurt. Why would he drink so much when he was meeting you and the children(!) at the airport? It's not on. I'd be having firm words and asking what made him do that. I sympathise, especially because you'll have to wait and wait until he's sober and conscious before you can even talk to him about it.

MardyArsedMidlander · 22/06/2012 12:42

There used to be an old saying by the wives of sheep shearers:
'Friday Night too tired; Saturday night too drunk; Sunday night too far away'.....

ScroobiousPip · 22/06/2012 12:47

Blimey, that's well out of order. Suggest you take yourself off to the spare room and have a lie in tomorrow. The children will know where he is and will make sure he wakes up. Let him have some 'quality time' with them.

Btw, a 2 hour time difference is perfectly manageable for a weekend. When exDH was working night shifts he would still manage a normal weekend - and that was a 12 hour time difference. He needs a serious rethink.

carabos · 22/06/2012 13:00

Off the point a bit, but why have you moved halfway round the world to then live halfway across the continent from each other?

MyLittleMiracles · 22/06/2012 13:11

YADNBU, Hope he gets an earful tomorrow, he deserves it, and i would be having aabsolutely no sympathy for his hangover and maybe "lose" the headache tablets "accidentally" on purpose but i of course would never have been mean enough to do that lying cow

wheredidiputit · 22/06/2012 13:18

I hope you spell it out to him how unacceptable his behaviour is.

I would be getting him up at a reasonable time say 8am and not letting him sleep.

I would also spell it out that if he comes next time drunk then he can stay at the airport and get the next plane back to Perth.

GnocchiNineDoors · 22/06/2012 13:18

Gosh its almost not worth you all living in the same country for four days a week, especially as you have no support the reat of the time. No family and friends around is a very high price to pay to spend 48 days a year with your dh who, it seems, doesnt treasure these times the way you do

Sad
GnocchiNineDoors · 22/06/2012 13:19

four days a month sorry

5Foot5 · 22/06/2012 13:28

I can understand why you are so upset but I don't suppose he planned to get so drunk. He could have been just winding down after a fortnight away and got carried away.

Personally I would say don't give him an ear bashing because that will just spoil the two days you have together. Try to enjoy yourself but have a quiet word before he goes back, when you are both in a good mood, to say how much you miss him and how upset you were that the first night was spoiled and hope that he gets the message and is more careful next time.

manicbmc · 22/06/2012 13:31

Send the kids in and then get the hoover out and let the kids be as noisy as possible. Sod that he'll be tired and have a hangover.

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