To have not take the bananas to Guides?

[ExitPursuedByABear]

Last week, DD phoned after her father had dropped her at Guides to say that she had forgotten they was having a water fight and she needed a change of clothes so could I just pop up with a change of clothes. No said I. Cue much tooing and froing on the phone until eventually DH went and picked her up and brought her home to get a change of clothes for herself and her friend . Tonight she announced that they were having another water fight but she was not bothering to join in as it is cold and she couldn't be hassled with having to get changed. So DH takes her to Guides, I cook DH's omelette. DH returns home, I am just serving up when DD phones to announce that they are having a fondue and can I just drive up with a couple of bananas. No said I. So we have had several texts and phone calls begging us to take the bananas but I have stood firm and refused. We have spent years running backwards and forwards to school with stuff she has forgotten and I feel we have to make a stand some time. She is 12.

But I feel like a complete heel.

Thanks Jen - I have met you on a previous Guide thread.

Trouble is, the Guide leader has had a personal tragedy so is not there at the moment - but I am making excuses aren't I?

Must toughen up.

Lend a Hand is Brownies. Guides is Be Prepared

www.angelfire.com/ga/redfernwaterlooguide/nfpromisemottoandlaw.html

Um ...No. It's Be Prepared

Brownies is Lend a Hand

I was a Brownie , Guide, Ranger, Young leader and a Guider.(For a short while) I think I know what I'm talking about.

"If the mountain won't come to Mohammed, then Mohammed must come to the mountain."

Mountains/bananas, it's all the same once you get metaphorical.

hth :)

www.girlguides.org.sg/cos/o.x?c=/ggs/pagetree&func=view&rid=4595

This is a better link...as you can see Exit, lots of laws being broken , lol !

I am struggling here... fgs that was for singapore...I was trying to do it too qickly...but I think the english one is not dissimilar!!

YANBU, but my softy of a DH probably would have taken them.
Anyway bananas are vile.

If it is a ten minute walk, at 12 she should be able to jog it in 5 minutes and come and get her own banana!

Another GG leader here. She should learn to be prepared. If there's no consequences she won't learn.

We're a tough bunch, aren't we redexpat :o

JenFraggle and redexpat

Please believe me, there are thousands of parents out there that are in absolutely awe of what you do with our daughters.

I respect and love you all. going to GG is the highlight of my daughter's week.

A few lines here on MN does not begin to explain my gratitude.

you need to stop running round after your DD for her sake.

"I just think she needs to learn we are not here to run about after her. But perhaps we are..."
Yes, she does. No, you're not. If you keep pandering to her supposed bad memory, how will it ever change? Will she still be like this at 14? 16? 18? 25? Stop it now and she could be cured by 13!

You would do far better as a parent if, instead of running around after her whenever she forgets stuff you taught her how to organise herself. For forgetful kids, routines, lists, electronic reminders on their phone, post-it notes are invaluable.

If she has a poor memory, she needs to learn to compensate for it.

You are all right. But that is why I end up blaming myself becasue I have failed to teach her to be organised. Sigh. Parenting is so difficult sometimes. Just when you have mastered one phase, whoosh, they grow up into the next one and you have to change tack.

It's a bananana FFS, nothing important.
My DD would have gone banananless if it had been me

Exit, stop blaming yourself for failing to teach her to be organised and start teaching her to be organised. And the first thing to do is to get her to realise that being disorganised has consequences. Then she'll more likely want to address the problem.

"But that is why I end up blaming myself "
We all do that - for everything. It doesn't mean we actually are to blame. How does that saying go - "a mother's place is in the wrong"? Children are not blank clay that we mould from scratch - they come pre-formed, we can hope only to influence them (at best).

Another Guide leader here. These could well be items the patrols have organised themselves, not something organised by the leaders. As a result, the girls are expected to remember for themselves and the leaders wouldn't be sending a letter home.

The rest of the patrol being annoyed with her for forgetting will probably be the best way for her to learn.