to be cross with dh

[snowgo00]

Ok so pregnancy not planned. DH not keen but had been ok about it. I am pleased after initial shock. Had bereavementrs in family so feels right. Had some bleeding at 8 weeks. Had an early scan without dh and all well at the time.
Did not fill me with confidence as had mmc at 10 weeks before.
On way to 12 weeks scan dh pretty much said he didn't mind if it went either way. Ie losing it would be no bad thing.
AIBU to be upset about this even some 9 weeks later.

OMG how insensitive!

Why does he feel this way do you think?

Ooh ouch that was a harsh thing to say. :-(

I'm speechless.

Er, no. Is he normally so insensitive?

yanbu to be upset, but you do need to find some way of coming to terms with what hesaid because it will only do you damage.

more

He's very detached, isn't he?

Has he seen the baby on the scan screen?

I guess he's being honest but rather cruel. I mean, he knows what happens when people have sex, right? There's always a risk of pgy and for him to be this flippant about your body, your baby etc is well out of order.

Does he even get the misery of miscarriage?

To be fair YANBU, but then neither is he, he could have put it more tactfully, but it is not unreasonable of him to feel that way. I am sure once the baby arrives all will be well!

The thing is he seems qite happy/almost excited . Got stroppy with me today because he wants to buy a new pushchair. We got rid of ours but I managed to get a perfectly acceptable one on freegle. Ok it is bulky but why spend hundreds of pounds when you don't have to?
Should understand miscarriage as we have been through it.

I think he had detached himself at that point. Having been through it before he prob had disengaged.
I would try to move on unless he is still acting like that.

its still very early days, he probably doesnt feel its real yet

he is being honest at least i suppose

oh my goodness. what a cruel thing to say. or, desperately insensitive. its possible he was trying to reassure you.