AIBU to think...

[AltruisticEnigma]

My friend from London is going to stay with my other friend who lives near me. They haven't seen eachother in a while. My other friend who lives near me and his girlfriend are putting up my friend for 4 days and asked for him to come down.

The girlfriend of my friend asked my London friend if he could put £10 towards the electricity meter. My AIBU is.

1. Am I being unreasonable to think that if you invite someone down to stay at yours, you are doing it out of the kindness of your heart and are therefore offering to let them stay there rent free so to speak. Sure they will pay for any meals you have outisde the house but I am wondering if you asked that person to specifically come down to see you, if you should ask them to pay for anything towards the house... Especially if they are only staying for 3 or 4 days.

1. If I am being unreasonable - is it still unreasonable to ask them to pay for £10, which is about 8 or 9 days worth of electricity when that person is only stayed for 4 days? (this is the bit that I think is a bit unfair).

Perhaps it's a case that it depends completely on the person you ask whether this is normal or not. I can get onboard perhaps with number one, but number two seems a little bit unfair, considering.

AIBU to think that this friend shouldn't have to pay towards their bills, even if it is a small amount?

It does seem strange to have a friend to visit for a few days and ask them for cash toward bills. I'd buy meals out, bring wine, or whatever, but wouldn't really think to pay toward electric, though if it were a pre-pay card thingy then I'd maybe buy a card.
If you invite guests to stay then you certainly don't expect them to bring more than their company.

YANBU. That's ridiculous. Isn't he putting towards water too? I'm sure they could work out pro rata what he's used and double it.

It's a bit odd to ask someone to pay for your utilities when you've invited them, a contribution to food/drink if you're skint is okay but surely the visiter isn't going to use up much more electric than when you are alone, so yes, I think it is weird. What does the visiting friend think?

HA ha, that is completely ridiculous!!

Or, is the visiter coming for some event/holiday and using them as a base to save on alternative accomodation costs. Maybe they feel they're going to be used as an hotel and want to cash in on this.

if you have an electricity meter it is likely that you are a low inciome household. it is bloody horrible when the thing runs out.. and you have to go into the celar in the pitch black to find the meter and press the emergency button, then worry all night that the lecky wioll go off again before you can get another card.

if that is the only way to be able to afford to have people to stay, so what. it is between them.

I have an Electric meter, and i still wouldn't charge my friends. Also £10, is a huge charge, currently we pay around £30 a month, so really it sounds like they are ripping their friends off.

LMAO @ kittyandthefontanelles

larks35 My friend was a bit stunned but politely agreed as he just appreciates being able to visit us down South, as he hasn't seen us in a few years. No, he's coming to visit us because he hasn't seen us in a few years and has just got some time off his University course so thought it would be nice to come down. Friend offered accomodation as our place is a bit hectic at the moment.

walkingonhotcoals I thought that. They also mentioned it to him when I was there, which is why I had an opinion mainly. Wouldn't you also talk to them about it before they arrived and not infront of others? Yeah they spend about the same as you £7 or £8 a week themselves, sometimes even less as there is just the 2 of them. To ask their friend to pay for just over a week for them (double his stay) seems really, really harsh to me.

redwhiteandblueeyedsusan I know what you mean. They are fairly low income. The girl has been in debt before but they spend a lot on holidays (2 or 3 a year) and neither of them work, so I think they should be fair on the friend. I don't think he'd mind putting some cash towards some food if they were struggling, it would make sense as he'd be directly using that.

That is a bit off, yes. You don't invite someone to your house and then charge them for the privilege...

If I fly to America and spend 4 days of my holiday with family they expect me to buy my own food to cook in their house which they eat too. We don't make them do that when they come over.

Each to their own I guess :)

I would bring food to friends' houses and gladly cook if staying with them. I was taught to never turn up empty handed. However I would draw the line at paying someone else's utility bills for them. OP YANBU! Perhaps your friend may decide to develop a very limiting mental health problem where they insist on keeping every single light & appliance in the house running for the entire duration of their stay?!

They are either very tightfisted, or very skint.

horace Haha yes. I reckon that's what my friend who was staying will be doing next time I think. Have his own little disco in the living room whilst they sleep :)

wanda or both, of course. :)

I think your friends GF has an utter cheek to be honest. I wouldn't dream of asking a friend who was visiting for a couple days. It's enough for me that they have decided to visit and spend time with me.

Your friends GF comes across as being quite grabby and materialistic.

YANBU. It's very rude and grabby.

Hex- tee hee!

goingeversoslowlymad I think the problem is she was in debt before. But then, if that's such a big issue why does she spend £1,500 on a trip to the US? Wouldn't you be oh so careful then? I don't know, it's just how I would be. But she's a bossy individual and I have said to my friend just off the record - that she seems a little bit 'controlling' but he says she doesn't mean to be. I'm not sure I just would tell my DP if he wanted money off my friends for something like that (he wouldn't) that I'd make up the relevant costs. But I know he wouldn't and he knows I wouldn't do that to his friends or family, either.

XD oh well we can't all be the greatest of hosts, can we?