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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to worry about DD (6yrs) going on school trip

25 replies

charllie · 14/06/2012 11:23

I recieved a permission slip yesterday for the end of year 1 school trip, its to Bournemouth Beach. As soon as i saw that its to the seaside, i started worrying. Not because i dont' trust the school, i guess i just worry too much, i don't know. I don't even like the idea of someone else going swimming with DD and not me. I dont' know anyone thats drowned, so there is no reason, guess because water can be dangerous (i work with children, so have this drummed in quite alot) I also worry that what if she was to wonder off and then gets lost! Its in july, so a busy time for beaches and i wont be there. I feel like i'm being silly, but still can't help the way that i'm feeling. Do any other parents have this same issue or is it just me lol.

OP posts:

Trioofprinces · 14/06/2012 11:25

YABU -schools have risk assessments and lots of adults with the children. It's s hard thing at first to give control of your child to others but they are well prepared. Don't worry about it so much.

TroublesomeEx · 14/06/2012 11:30

YABU.

The teachers won't want anything to happen to your DD any more than you do.

Even if you think that they won't be completely focused on your child for the same reasons as you would be, I can guarantee that they will have absolutely no intention of taking any risks that would result in them having to tell you your DD was injured; facing a possible criminal investigation; having their careers ruined; having the whole incident splashed across national newspapers/TV with their full name, school, and photo included.

I know that accidents happen on school trips, but far more accidents happen with children are with their parents. Because accidents happen, but rarely because the teachers/adults just forgot to look after the children properly.

Your DD will have a fab day. You could offer to go along as a parent helper for the day. My DD is in year 1 - I wish she was going on a seaside trip at the end of the year!

Thatisnotitatall · 14/06/2012 11:30

YABU - although not terribly, as we all worry irrationally, but really is your 6 year old the type to wander off or throw herself into the sea? Those concerns sound more appropriate to a 3 year old, unless she has form for wandering off. (I have a 6 year old too, and I would put the onus on her not to wander off, and speak to her gently about the importance of staying with the group if I was concerned. My 6 yo has also been away with school - actually Kindergarten as we live abroad - when she was 5 - on an overnight stay, and although I worried I knew it was irrational due to the details of the trip, so kept it hidden, and she had so much fun and still talks about it).

It sounds a nice school trip to me :)

WorraLiberty · 14/06/2012 11:31

She's got more chance of swimming the channel with a rubber duck under her arm than getting lost on most school trips nowadays.

The ratio of children to adults is tiny and no-one goes anywhere without thorough risk assessments.

Will they actually be swimming then?

NeverFearWonderWomanIsHere · 14/06/2012 11:32

You probably are being a bit U, but it's understandable. My dd2 goes on her first school trip in July to a nature reserve. She's in reception, and tiny. I'm sure I'll be a nervous wreck the day she goes, I was the same when dd1 went on her first school trip. Now she goes on many school trips, including swimming every week with the school and I'm fine with it. Try not to worry too much, she'll be fine.

imnotmymum · 14/06/2012 11:33

She will be fine our school does a whole school trip to the beach every year and it is lovely for them. YANBU to be worries you are a caring Mum and of course we want to be there all the time for your baby oh it is horrible them growing up but lovely at the same time

Dinosaurhunter · 14/06/2012 11:33

Yanbu - your just a normal mum worrying about your child , but try not tO push these fears onto your little girl and let her have a good time .

BlueEyedPeas · 14/06/2012 11:37

My son went to Skegness (200 miles away) for his school trip last year (yr 2), they coned off a big part of the beach and the children had to stay inside and they took small groups down to paddle and then on a donkey ride. They all got an ice cream. I must admit I was worried but he had a fantastic time.

DeWe · 14/06/2012 11:39

I doubt very much they're going to go swimming in the sea. Health and safety would have a fit and a half. They might paddle, but probably need a lifeguard with them to do even that.

PomBearWithAnOFRS · 14/06/2012 11:40

It will probably be far too cold for them to even contemplate a paddle, let alone a swim! This is England

TantrumsAndBalloons · 14/06/2012 11:44

Speaking from experience of many many school trips, all of mine have come back safely :)

Of course you will worry, it's a long way, it's a first trip, but I'm sure as people have said before the teachers/helpers will have a very close eye on things and she will love it.

veritythebrave · 14/06/2012 11:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Laquitar · 14/06/2012 14:04

Don't worry, it will probably rain

YANBU as long as you try to not show dd how much you worry. I have to put up a great act usually.
On the day she goes come here and chat so you don't bite your nails.

sadsac · 14/06/2012 14:11

YANBU I have exactly the same worry with a trip being organised for our year 1 class. I think what it is for me is that I know what she's capable of (in terms of running off/not doing as told/showing off) - whereas perhaps a helper might not. I know one of my dd's friends is not going on the trip - and as it was quite cheap I think it can only be for safety reasons.

I am letting mine go but am going to drum into her some safety rules before she goes.

In my defence somebody died on a trip from my school when I was young.

DumSpiroSpero · 14/06/2012 14:15

I was prepared to jump on and say YABU but I know what you mean with the water thing.

My DD went to her first 'swimming party' recently. Even though the parents of the child whose party it was were perfectly nice and responsible, they were in a single depth pool and DD can swim I still felt a bit wibbly about it which is not like me at all.

Having said that I work at a nursery that runs an annual beach trip and I know that at our place every i is dotted and every t is crossed (in triplicate - I've done the admin the last two years and it is a nightmare!).

fortifiedwithtea · 14/06/2012 15:09

YANBU. I would worry too. I have the sort of kids who get soaked head to toe in a puddle, no joke. DD1 is 13 and should know better, DD2 is 9 and has SEN, can't swim, tendancy to wander off, has poor sence of danger. Trips to the beach for us always involve 2 sets of top clothes for both kids and we can't relax and that's on a one to one ratio.

Offering to be a parent volunteer sounds a good idea.

Original poster

charllie · 18/06/2012 22:14

i spoke to her teacher on Friday and feel much better about it. The part of the beach that they're going to is quiet. Teacher said that this is the 4th time they've gone there and each time up to now, they've only seen a hand full of people when there. The ratios are alot lower and they have lots of staff going, plus parents to help. I'd love to go, but am a working mum and as i work term time only, i can't have time off in term time. I know on the day, i'll still be nervous, but will deal with it. Don't want DD missing out, just because her mummy is a worrier lol. And certainly wont be letter on to her about my worries :) Thank you all for your advice and kind words :D

OP posts:

lovebunny · 18/06/2012 22:17

hope all goes well. i would have encouraged you not to let her go, but if you've made your decision, and it seems very reasonable, i'll go with it!

Original poster

charllie · 23/06/2012 20:46

Thanks lovebunny :) going to let her go, she's so excited about it bless her and all of her friends are going too. Don't want to let her down, just because i'm feeling anxious about it

OP posts:

Noqontrol · 23/06/2012 20:58

It's perfectly normal to feel anxious. My 4 yr old just went on her first school trip and I was really anxious too. My dd is the type to wander off, but really the school had the whole thing in hand. It put it in to perspective for me when one of the other mums said she was never allowed on any school trips as a child, as her mum worried too much. Anyway my dd had the best time ever and so will yours. But it's completely natural to worry, that's what we do!

Original poster

charllie · 23/06/2012 21:05

Thank you Noqontrol, that has helped. I don't want to be the sort of mum who stops her child from doing things like this, i loved school trips when i was a child. So need to smile and let her go, then worry when she's there haha

OP posts:

Goofymum · 23/06/2012 21:10

I understand you being anxious too, it's perfectly normal. I was a parent helper on my DD's first trip to the beach aged 5. There was a ratio of 2 or 3 children to every adult and everything was very well organised and monitored. The kids had a blast. Hope your DD has a lovely time.

bigbluebus · 23/06/2012 21:59

I went on a school trip to the seaside once with a Yr 2 class (I was a parent helper).
We went to a quiet part of the beach. As soon as we arrived the teacher drew a long line in the sand along the beach(between the children and the sea) and told the children that they were not to cross that line without an adult. They did sandcastle building competitions and shell collecting. A specific time was designated for paddling and it was a ratio of one adult to two children in the water. The children had to hold the adults hand at all times in the water and they were not allowed to go in further than knee deep in the water.
Like others have said, the trip will have been risk assessed to within an inch of the teachers life.
Hope your DD has a lovely time and that the sun shines - although not too much as they will spend all day making sure they have enough sun cream on and not enough time for fun!!!!

edwinbear · 23/06/2012 22:40

YANBU to worry. DS (2.9) came home with a letter last week advising me that he is going on a nursery day trip to the Natural History Museum in a couple of weeks, involving a trip on the tube. I am a nervous wreck, but I am doing my best to just suck it up and deal with it. Hope she has a great time and you manage to distract yourself whilst she's there so you don't stew too much!

enimmead · 23/06/2012 22:53

I've organised loads of school trips including the beach one with reception and y1 / 2. I think we almost had 1 -1 ratio of parents to younger children. Children were allowed in very small and heavily supervised trips to paddle.

Loads of paperwork. Loads of head counts. And loads of whinging from my year 3 / 4 class when we had to walk along the beach path back to the park. A whole 1/ 2 mile.

School trips are great fun - but I hate being the adult in charge. You have all those parents watching you, probably gossiping about you and you are the one with all the responsibility.

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