To not want the lollipop lady at dd's school to talk about my pregnancy / birth to all the other mums?

[Wigglewoo]

I'm really annoyed. I don't think there's much I can do about this except be annoyed but I need to know if I'm being unreasonable.

I'm massively pregnant. I'm 39 weeks and I'm due to have my ds via elective c section on Thursday. The reason I have chosen to have a c section is because I had a terrible labour followed by awful pnd with dd (although it was a fight to get my section granted as my consultant was insistent that I should have a vaginal birth but that's another story).. Dd is aged 9.

Everyday I walk dd to school. We have to cross via the lollipop lady (there is no other way to access the school except via a side road that adds 20 mins longer onto the journey).

Everyday (and I mean everyday, twice a day) this lady has made comments to me about my pregnancy. This is fine, I realise people want to talk to pregnant people - it happens.

The thing that is annoying me is that now I am nearing the end of my pregnancy she will literally stand there with a whole load of mums nattering away and as I approach the crossing she will say (loudly) "here she comes! nearly time! not long now!" etc etc... so loudly I can hear her half way up the road.

This annoys me. I feel I have no privacy.

I have explained to her - in passing as I cross the road - that I know when I will be having the baby as I am having a c section. This was a mistake as now I have all the nosey questions as to why and her now saying "oh poor you, how awful" - no, I CHOSE to have a section.... and then her saying "oh well you never know, baby may come before then!"

Errrr I bloody well hope not as that would be my worst nightmare.

Yes I know I sound like a miserable sod. But obviously I am anxious enough anyway and I just don't want the world and it's announcer sharing my business with everyone.

I actually walked the long way back this morning (adding 20 mins on to my walk home) so I did not have to pass her again.

I am due to see her again at the school run at 3pm. Joy.

YANBU! This sort of thing really annoys me...BUT I think you may have to just grin and bare it, not long to go.

Good Luck and enjoy your new baby when he/she arrives!

Oh poor you. I'd probably have told her to fuck off with her commentary by now, but then I really am a grumpy cow. Good luck with the last bit of the pregnancy.

I think you need to let this one go, it really is not anything important to worry about.

Thanks.. I think I just needed to let off steam about it to be honest...

I appreciate it's not "anything important" as such but if you've really struggled with antenatal depression and pnd and a difficult previous birth, someone going on at you twice a day everyday is enough to drive you insane.

I just think she sees it as her "duty" to inform everyone else about my pregnancy ... like she's a pillar of the community or something.. She's always telling me so and so had her baby and whatever else... I don't even know who so and so is most of the time!!

Sigh. Not long now I know!

YANBU but i do think pregnant women become almost perceived as public property when the bump becomes prominent - annoying as it is

At least she will be interested in your new baby not you when you walk past her in a few weeks. Grit your teeth.

Good luck for Thurs. I had an ELCS and it was absolutely the right choice for me and I recovered quickly, so hopefully you will find things much easier this time. Enjoy your new little one.

I can see how this would be annoying and frustrating for you, but you only have to grin and bear it for 3 more days. As soon as a bump becomes visible, it seems that privacy does go out the window with pregnancy - random people making comments etc. Some people enjoy this part of pregnancy, some people loathe it. If it continues after the birth and she makes comments about your LO every day, then maybe you could have a quiet word if you really feel she is being OTT and indiscreet to the point you have to lengthen your journey to school.

Just smile and nod and envisage beating her to death with her lollipop. She means well, as I'm sure you know, but are allowed to be pissed off at the end of your pregnancy!

That would annoy me. Extremely tedious. Why don't you just tell her to stop it. Alternatively, if you need a bit of support ask a friend to go with you and when the lollipop lady mentions it get your friend to say something along the lines of she's had enough of the commentary and then you look the lollipop lady in the eye and say yes.

YANBU, but unfortunately she thinks she is being nice so there is nothing you can do. However, I am putting a hex on her for you from a distance. I am weaving a Willow-type spell that will put a zip on her mouth. No need to thank me.

Good luck! I am sure all will go very well.

(I HATED all this when I was pg and I can even remember hating it when my mum was pregnant with my brother. He had the temerity to be a couple of days late and the hardcore interrogations I was getting from the dinner ladies made me consider bunking off lunch.)

YANBU, i hate it when people comment on my bump, and having someone scream about it twice a day who you barely know would be my worst nightmare, congratulations on not shoving her lollipop stick up her backside before now!

ive just been asked again when im due, was only packing away my shopping in sainsburys, when i said im due next monday she was horrified that i was even out of the house and dragged another checkout person over to tell her all about the freak that went shopping a week before her due date

Our lollipop-man (as lovely as he is) always says the same thing to me every day. "Hows Smiler (dd2) today?" and "Peace and quiet now" on the way back. I really dont know what to say to him anymore, as i feel i'm just repeating the same thing every day. I've actually started crossing further down so i dont have to speak to him lol.
Good Luck for Thursday :)

I know you are just annoyed and a bit miffed but she sees your every day and is a friendly woman and I find a lot of lollypop people are loud and will shout i know our man does it too , let it go she will be cooing over the baby in a few weeks good luck for your section

Unfortunately at 39 weeks your pregnancy is not something you can keep as a private matter. It announces itself to anyone who sees you.

At least you'll only havea few more days of this to endure, annoying though it may be.

Poor lollipop lady,
Horrible, low paid job,
Trying to be sociable !
Lighten up !!
You're feeling crap, its not her fault !!

She means well bless her. That said I would find it v annoying and at 39wks you could probably get away with telling her to shut up and blaming it on pg hormones

I don't usually mind people I don't know talking about the weather or something. But when it gets into stuff that's personal and none of their business, it's really annoying. There's a woman behind the counter at Boots who always asks how I'm getting on with some medication I take - I find that really nosey. I know she's just trying to be friendly - but it's personal FGS.

Your mistake was to engage with her in the first place. Just tell her plainly to shut up. Well, you can be more tactful than that but be direct.

I was thinking that they probably speak to you as you are the only one who has ever paid any notice at all.

Mistake was to tell her too much.

Yanbu because that is really annoying! But stop telling her stuff - just nod and smile! 'It might come before then' 'Mmm-hmm, you never know' etc.

I think she's trying to be friendly. I can't see what you're getting annoyed about. You don't HAVE to answer anything: "why are you having a section?" could be politely answered with "Ugh, I'd rather not think about all that!"

You could get away with beating her over the head with the lollipop to be honest and blame hormones.

All my sympathy as v annoying, I had a dinner lady at my school who always asked ' oh havnt you had it yet?' from 35 weeks.

I was so tempted to say just fuck the fuck off you stupid cow what the flying fuck do you think ate??? But didn't!!

Good luck Thursday xx

the more I read on here the more irritated I become.
If I become pregnant are people going to be shouting stuff at me and questioning my birth choices? Holy hell.
I need to prepare some responses before this hopefully happens!

yanbu. I thought my pregnancy chat was tedious, asking how far along and if it was a boy/girl/surprise, now I'm worried I'll be fielding questions of a hideous nature.

I might just say I'm fat. Or discuss is great detail medical terms.

Slowest

. Every comment from ' oh your carrying low'!! To ' have you got piles yet I had piles with my last' To ' has your milk come through I leaked for months' yadi yadi yaar.