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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that while I appreciate the lift, it would be nice if...

51 replies

GnocchiNineDoors · 05/06/2012 17:45

...we could go faster than 60 miles an hour on the motorway?

We have been away for the weekend and MIL kindly drove as my car is damaged. However on picking us up said she wont go above 60mph as this is the moat fuel efficient speed.

When she last filled up I paid and was so tempted so say "well I dont mind paying for the extra petrol" in the hope shed travel at 70mph.

Its a 150 mile trip. So far, we have travelled 75 miles and have been in the car over 2 hours without stopping.

Our origional eta was 6.10pm and it has now got to 6.45 pm. I feel bad for being frustrated but we are crawling. Doing 57mph up the A1 motorway as we speak.

Not only that but 6mo DD has allready been in the car seat for aaaaggggeeeees. We could have been nearly home by now.

OP posts:
Ephiny · 05/06/2012 18:43

Well she did tell you she wouldn't be going over 60mph, and no one forced you to get in the car if you felt that was either an unacceptably slow way to get home, or an unsafe way to drive on the motorway.

I think you're being a bit nasty by sneering at her on a public board behind her back while she's doing you a favour. How do you think she'd feel if she knew you were posting this?

I can understand you feeling frustrated at the slow progress, but this is not really a very nice thing to do, is it?

JubileeSchmoobilee · 05/06/2012 18:46

My lovely dad does 50mph on the dual carriageway, 55mph on the motorway, he insists it is because he is in no hurry to get anywhere like the other crazy drivers.

It annoys me as seems to take twice as long to get anywhere.

YouOldSlag · 05/06/2012 18:47

Agree with Ephiny- plus OP, your MIl is driving inthe RAIN as well. Not exactly a barrel of laughs for her is it?

SquidgyBiscuits · 05/06/2012 18:51

Bit of a difference between an HGV and a car!

The speed limit in the UK for an HGV is 60 on the motorway. Everybody knows this. They are mahoosive and can be seen from miles away, so it's no surprise when you reach them.

The speed limit for a car is 70. Cars are often hidden amongst lorries etc. most drivers expect a car to be travelling at the speed limit, which despite the many claims to the contrary IS a target speed. To come up on a car travelling slowly will cause people to slam on their breaks, and change lanes last minute, which is where it gets dangerous.

I cannot abide slow drivers. Driving slowly is dangerous, especially on the motorway. The safest way to drive is with the flow of traffic, not against it.

somedayillbesaturdaynite · 05/06/2012 18:59

i was pointing out that travelling at that speed on a motorway isn't 'very dangerous' as previously stated even if the vehicle is a car. yes the limit is 60mph but lorries are also legally required to be fitted with a limiter that allows them only to travel at max of 56mph. it's pretty obvious that a car is different to a lorry but that doesn't make it 'very dangerous' for a car to travel at 56mph either :/

Destrier · 05/06/2012 19:08

If you are going no faster than 70 mph, you shouldn't need to 'slam your breaks on' for someone going at 60.

ChunkyPickle · 05/06/2012 19:13

Goodness. if you have to 'slam your brakes on' or 'change lanes at the last minute' upon coming across a car doing 60, I'd say that you're the dangerous one on the motorway - not the 60 mile an hour driver...

AppleAndBlackberry · 05/06/2012 19:48

My Dad drives at 55 on the basis that it's slower than the lorries so he almost never has to overtake anyone! I have not been in the car with him in about 10 years.

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 05/06/2012 19:51

But it's not just HGVs that are limited is it? Some fleet vans and cars are now fitted with limiters too.

RightBuggerforit · 05/06/2012 20:41

You offered to pay for the 'extra' fuel?! Why aren't you paying for all the fuel - it's being used to kindly get you from A to B. You don't sound grateful at all, imo yabu and need to suck it up.

apricotmonday · 05/06/2012 20:47

As long as she's not hogging the middle lane!

AdventuresWithVoles · 05/06/2012 20:55

I was all set to say YABVU*. And even if she drove at 70 they wouldn't be home that much faster (honestly, do the maths).

*until I saw the bit about the baby in carseat.
tbh, with children in the car, especially babies, I tend to drive as fast as I dare.

Hope OP has safely arrived by now!

CrispyCod · 05/06/2012 20:59

I always thought there was a MINIMUM speed limit (50mph) on the motorway but apparently not. Unless the speed is illuminated in a red ring. I've been driving for over 20 yrs. Best read that highway code again!

COCKadoodledooo · 05/06/2012 21:48

YANBU to be miffed that it's taking a long time, but YABU otherwise - her car, her fuel economy.

You can set a TomTom to a limited speed btw. I always set mine to 60 and then am pleasantly surprised when I arrive early. It's the small things for me..

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 05/06/2012 21:56

I want to agree with you. But dh has recently decided to conduct a little experiment during his 50 minute each way drive to work every day. He seems to think he has definatly saved money on petrol and had to fill up less often by driving more conservatively than he would normally.

LRDtheFeministDragon · 05/06/2012 22:23

Whether or not 60 is the most economical depends on the car she drives (obviously), so there's no point us speculating about that unless we know what she drives and are familiar with it.

That aside, I think it's her decision and 60 is not so slow as to be dangerous, so I am on her side. If she were driving slowly because she could not manage faster, or if she were driving so slowly as to be a danger on the motorway, I'd think you had a point, but you are just being impatient so far as I can see, and I think that is rude and does come across as if you really don't properly appreciate the lift.

chunkythighs · 05/06/2012 23:52

Oh my God, your Op reminded me of the time when my in-laws offered to drive us up to the airport to get our flight home......Given that I am obsessive about being on time they (not us) got organised 15 minutes after we were standing at the door, and then drove on the motorway at 40 (fucking) mph. Halfway there my Mil suggested that we phone the desk at Ryanair and tell them we will only be 10 minutes late Hmm. .........We so missed that flight. My blood pressure took days to recover.

Latara · 06/06/2012 00:20

OP - you are lucky, trust me.. my Dad lives in a town filled with old people - & it really IS dangerous. They regularly: brake over 20 feet before traffic lights, slow down if the lights turn green (WHY??), hit the accelerator 0-60mph in 2 seconds in car parks just as someone walks past (ouch), drive at 20mph in fast lanes in the most expensive largest top-of-the range 2 litre engined car you can get, speed up if anyone tries to overtake, drink LOTS of cheap beer at the Legion then veer from kerb to white line & back ALL DOWN THE HILL (where are the police ffs?); & continue driving even with severe cognitive & mental impairments.... THEN don't get me started on the KILLER MOBILITY SCOOTERS!!!!

EchoBitch · 06/06/2012 00:24

Are you there yet? Grin

TheDetective · 06/06/2012 00:36

I drive economically. For my car that is around 60mph on the motorway, and to the speed limit on 30/40/50mph roads. I rarely need to use the brake, and instead use engine braking. Planning ahead, and being observant makes for much better drivers.

I used to drive at 70-90mph on the motorway.

I learned my lesson.

I save LOTS of money with my new eco driving, and have been driving this way for 2 years now with no problems.

So, yes, YABU.

geegee888 · 06/06/2012 00:42

I remember once hiring a van that was electronically limited to 57mph and constantly overtaking cars on nearly empty the motorway doing slower than that. Bloody dangerous, driving that slow. Some of them must be doing around 45mph at times. IMHO driving a bit faster makes you concentrate.

Birdsgottafly · 06/06/2012 00:43

I think that 60 is acceptable as it is the speed limit when pulling a trailer, which i do frequently, any slower and it can be annoying.

I have had drivers try to get me to go faster, because i don't think that they realise that there is a different speed limit for trailers and caravans.

scuzy · 06/06/2012 00:46

think there is an up and coming for bumper stickers to remind warn other drivers of these economical drivers. i call them "sunday drivers".

scuzy · 06/06/2012 00:46

up and coming *market

kittyandthefontanelles · 06/06/2012 05:57

Actually its 56mph so she WBU

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