AIBU to not want SIL at DS2's 1st Birthday Party?

[2Old2BeABluePeterPresenter]

Help I need some advice. At DS1's 1st Birthday Party SIL had a screaming fit tantrum at my husband when he stopped DN from hurting DS1, this was in front of all my family and my Best friend, I am loathe to have Birthday Parties for my DC untill they ask for them that is, as I couldn't stand her doing it in front of my friends. She has never apologised to me, AIBU to not invite her? Every time I think of DS1's party it upsets me as that's the first thing I remember!

Don't invite her.

But surely this behaviour isn't exclusive to birthday parties?

Forewarned is firearmed - think of different strategies to deal with it if it happens again.

Of course you can choose not to invite her if you don't want to. It's your decision.

My top strategy would be not to invite her. The last thing the OP wants/needs is to be on edge at her DS2's party waiting for SIL to kick off.

YANBU

No it's not Chaos, she's a PITA, we generally try and avoid her and her H. Even DH said 'christ, they're like the chav family everyone avoids' when we were forced to go on holiday with them :(

How can you be forced to go on holiday with them? Anyway unless this was a one off I wouldn't invite her.

have you not addressed the issue since?

Does she know there is a problem?

YANBU

She knows there us a problem.

Holiday happened when PIL wanted help finding a holiday home. They wanted some opinion on the few they had found. We all went, I was 7 months pregnant with DS1. We had all just got over the shock of finding out BIL had had an affair, she took him back. It was not fun watching DH and FIL trying not to hit him. Was all arranged before it came out, DH said we had to go to stop FIL killing BIL.