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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to leave the baby in the car while I pay for petrol?

99 replies

GnocchiNineDoors · 01/06/2012 22:21

Light on...needed petrol sharpish. The only pay at pump (which is what I usually use) was miles away and it was rush hour.

Dd was asleep in her carseat.

I parked in the patrol bay right outside the shop (when you walk out of the shop you have to walk around the car in bay one to get passed) and locked her in. There was no queue and i could keep my eyes on her the whole time.

Im now not sure if I did the right thing

OP posts:

minimisschief · 02/06/2012 01:25

makes me laugh because there was a thread other week about someone leaving a child at home while they hopped across a road to the school opposite the house and the responses were exactly the opposite but the same dangers are present

takes longer than expected
unexpected fire
mum ran over

what is the actual difference?

nightowlmostly · 02/06/2012 01:40

I have a 7 week old ds and this crossed my mind the other day, nearly started a thread to ask if it was ok!

The other day I went with the baby shopping and found myself in a pay and display carpark. I hadn't really thought it through as an issue, but came to the conclusion that he'd be ok for 2 minutes while I went for a ticket. I think there's a lot of paranoia these days about this stuff when really, what could possibly happen?

pinkyp · 02/06/2012 01:46

I've never seen anyone take their children's out of cars when they pay for petrol. Never. I always leave mine in and lock the doors- you can always see them through the big glass windows

Akermanis · 02/06/2012 01:47

I would never do it, when I was overseas read a story about a baby that died in the car because the mother passed out in the petrol station on a hot day, It gets very hot in cars very quickly.

Birdsgottafly · 02/06/2012 01:50

"when I was overseas"

There is the key sentence, it wouldn't happen in the UK, the emergency services would attend and people would use common sense, get the keys and hold the child until the police came.

Every petrol station has camera's.

Noqontrol · 02/06/2012 01:50

I guess the difference is minimiss that if something happened to you between leaving the car at the pump and entering the petrol station, is that a member of staff might just notice that a car had been parked at the pump for longer than normal Bearing in mind that if something happened to you in the petrol station it would be the staff calling the ambulance and all that. As opposed to leaving your kids alone in the house and buggering off to the school where people might not know you'd left your kids at home alone. Whaddya think?

Noqontrol · 02/06/2012 01:52

And again, agree with birds, you take in to consideration your environment as well don't you?

Noqontrol · 02/06/2012 01:53

That was to akermanis btw.

Birdsgottafly · 02/06/2012 01:53

what is the actual difference?

The child is in view of others (see above) and it is illegal to abandon your child in a locked building. It would be illegal to leave the garage, just in case you are wondering.

The isn't any risk involved, if in the UK and the car is locked.

Birdsgottafly · 02/06/2012 01:59

All of the UK's petrol stations have clear camera's on entry, exit and at the pumps. The attendant watches like a hawk who comes and goes.

If anything happened you would have your keys in your hand.

Petrol stations are on premimum response time, a child wouldn't have time to even become distressed before being freed from the car.

PineCones · 02/06/2012 02:24

Umm where does the over thinking end then? Chances of passing out in the petrol station are probably as high as having a stroke or heart attack or fit behind the wheel.

CheshireDing · 02/06/2012 03:53

Interesting because I have done both with DD (nearly 8 months).

Mostly I now try and go to Morrisons because it's cheaper and has a pay at pump.If I use our local petrol station though I take the car seat in because I can't see the car from the till and it's quite rural so could be the only car there.

I worry about someone pulling up to nick the car. I know I am probably being silly but that's what works for me.

maddening · 02/06/2012 06:59

it's all about assessing risk - in the area I live in there is a low crime rate - so leaving ds in a locked car is safer than taking him on the forecourt - he is strapped in with nothing that poses a choking hazard and I will be 2 mins at the max - if others assess their risk differently so be it but there is no cause for you to feel uabu and personally I would do as you have

Proudnscary · 02/06/2012 07:55

I also do this. You sound very lovely and sensible and I wouldn't think about this a second longer

ErikNorseman · 02/06/2012 08:02

Totally fine.

Mrskbpw · 02/06/2012 08:03

I also used to worry about this and never left my baby in the car. I didn't think the car would catch fire or be stolen but just in case he wanted me and I wouldn't be there. But now i've got two I leave them in the car.

Just out of interest has anyone ever been run over on a petrol station forecourt?! Seems much less dangerous than crossing the road.

SootySweepandSue · 02/06/2012 08:27

Only problem I've had with this is locking the door. I'm not happy leaving the door unlocked but if you lock it in my car the alarm is on automatically so if they move then the alarm goes off and terrifies them.

Brandnewbrighttomorrow · 02/06/2012 08:42

I've never taken any of mine out of the car while getting petrol, can't see any reason why you would! I regularly go to the bakers and leave them out front in the car. Mind you the odds of anyone wanting to nick my car are non-existent slim

sensuallettuce · 02/06/2012 08:54

YABU to lock her in the car, if there was a fire (which IMO is more likely at a petrol station than someone snatching her) anyone trying to help wouldn't have been able to get her out.

People are way too paranoid.

KitCat26 · 02/06/2012 09:06

I always leave mine in the car and always have. I do lock the doors though, I think someone trying to nick the car is more likely than a fire (or someone trying to snatch the children).

DH was horrified that I left DD1 in the car when I first filled up after having her. He soon got over it when he had to fill up .

LeeCoakley · 02/06/2012 09:20

You use your common sense because that is what parenting is all about. It's only on Mumsnet where everyone is so fucking judgemental that people lose confidence in their own decisions. Of course it's ok to leave a baby in a car on a forecourt and you don't even have to justify it (I could see it, only for a minute, was asleep etc) Grrr....

Rabbitee · 02/06/2012 09:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JubileeSchmoobilee · 02/06/2012 09:39

Heck if someone did steal my car with my three DC in the back they would sharp bring them back!

knowitallstrikesagain · 02/06/2012 09:54

YANBU.

As for car theft, someone could come and push you out of the way while you are filling up and drive off with your car. So to be really, really, really safe you should take baby out of the car and hold her in one arm as you fill up. Otherwise you are a bad mother.

LittlePandaBear · 02/06/2012 09:54

I'm obviously in the complete minority but I've always taken my daughter (18 months) out of the car with me when paying for petrol, it never occured to me not to! It's just the same as going into a shop and parking outside/down the road, it's natural that she'd come with me. I know it will be a very small risk to leave her but I'd be more worried about someone trying to steal her or the car!

However at my local petrol station takes forever to pay as there's always about 10 people in the queue/buying groceries and 1 person at the till.

Although I normally try to buy petrol when I can go without her.

Actually I feel guilty enough when I take my supermarket trolley back while she's in the car. Yes she is my PFB

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