to wish there was an accurate way of predicting exactly when labour will kick off?

[Kveta]

we can time conception dates to within a few hours by scans etc, can tell who the father is by DNA testing (or in DS's case, by looking at him next to DH), can in some cases accurately predict the birth weight by scans, can diagnose all sorts of anatomical issues in utero, but somehow there is no fool proof way of telling when baby will actually bloody arrive (unless you have a ELCS, of course).

why can't the body have some obvious sign, like belly button popping out 24 hours before labour starts, or fingernails changing colour, or SOMETHING. or some nice hormone changes that piss sticks could pick up on?

rather than niggly cramps for weeks on fecking end, which may mean something, but probably don't.

not that I am pissed off at the moment, oh no

Find the one day that's really inconvenient - no child care, for example, or partner in Paris.... that kind of thing. You can be absolutely sure that you will go into labour on that particular day.

can tell who the father is by DNA testing

This is generally done after birth. So tell you what, you go ahead and have your baby and then I will tell you what time you had it, down to the last minute.

When are /were you due?

Helpfully, it always starts at the end of pregnancy. Ta-daa.

ah, you have clearly read the 'things to say to piss off a heavily pregnant woman' manual that all the women at playgroup were reciting today :o

And I was talking more about scientific breakthroughs than just ante-natal testing knowitall :)

jeee that would be today, so of course feck all has happened. am only 39+3 but had mc immediately before this pg, so have been pg for 46 weeks it seems :o

In my case I never did (induced for three flipping days before a CS). It would have been nice to know exactly when DD was planning to arrive.

Oh I know the feeling, we're so used to generally having control of our lives but this very important thing has us playing guessing games. I do sympathise with your frustration.

I knew I'd go into Labour on a Saturday afternoon. The hospital was next to the footy ground.

I did.

Spend £200 on Tesco.com ( then chuck it all out a week later).
Organise a really lovely expensive non refundable weekend away.

there is ... contractions!!

There is. It's called elcs