Just pissed off

[madasa]

I know I am probably being unreasonable and over sensitive but I just need to get it out.

My lovely dad died 7 months ago and I'm really struggling. I'm having counselling and am on anti depressants. That said I am doing everything possible to make myself feel better and am keeping busy, still going to work etc.

My sister knows I am struggling (and I'm sure she is too) although I haven't burdened her with how I am feeling.
A few weeks ago we made a specific date next Wednesday to go out. We were to meet half way early evening and go out for a meal ...just her and me.

Tonight speaking to her on the phone I asked if she was still ok for Wednesday and she just casually told me that she'd have to take a rain check as she was going out Friday eve, Saturday eve and during the day Monday and it would be too much. She presumably made these arrangements after we had arranged to go out.

I don't even know what I expect posting this but I just feel like I don't even bloody matter......and breathe...

Maybe she didn't quite appreciate how much it meant to you. I can understand why you would feel upset in the circumstances - not BU

Thank you Marshy....I think you are probably right. I don't want to fall out with her, hence my post on here.
I had fillings and a tooth extraction under sedation yesterday so think I am probably just feeling extra sorry for myself.
Will go and find chocolate...

Sounds like you deserve a treat. Are you going to rearrange with your sister - maybe let her know that you are looking forward to a catch up with her?

We will rearrange I guess. I am seeing her on Monday as we have a big family gathering happening.
She has a heart of gold and would probably be horrified if she thought she'd upset me.
Think it just caught me on a down moment....am sure it will pale into insignificance tomorrow.
Just thought a post on MN was less damaging than a pissed off text to my sister

Off to bed now madasa - hope the chocolate was nice and you're feeling a bit better

X posts.............def post here than pissed off text - good decision!

sorry for the loss of your father, hope you enjoy Monday with your family and in the meantime rant all you want

I think I would also be upset if my sister cancelled plans with me saying she had too many other social events to attend. I would feel as if I came last on the list of her priorities.

However, if you have a good relationship with your sister and this is not a regular occurance, i would assume that she just felt she could be honest with you [that she is not up to going out Wed as well] and that you would reschedule at a later time.

Could you tell her how you feel and that it is important to you that you have some time together?

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your Dad. You are very entitled to be feeling raw and sensitive at the moment. Please use us to vent at if it is at all helpful.

McHappy thank you...am looking forward to Monday

*RaPaPa it isn't a regular occurrence....but that's because we hardly ever go out together! I guess I could tell her how I feel but I feel like such a coiled spring at the moment I'm afraid I would just get overly upset. I think I should maybe just try to let it go.

Funny how typing things out and seeing them in black and white helps to unravel the muddle that is my mind at the moment