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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to tell police about weird incident while bf-ing?

24 replies

senoritachiquita · 29/05/2012 18:46

Something weird happened today and I'd appreciate thoughts on whether I should take any action! (sorry it's long!!)

My dd is 5 weeks old and I am breastfeeding her. I've only just started to feel comfortable bfing while out and about. Today we were out on a walk on a route that is pretty well used by other families. It was hot as hell though and dd started crying for a feed, so I turned off into a nearby park. It was fairly quiet so thought this was a good spot to give her a feed. Anyway, this guy walked past, then stopped some distance up the path from me, squatted down, and appeared to be looking out across the park. I didnt think anything of it at first as he didnt seem to be looking at me - I thought he had lost his dog or something. Also, he was far enough away that he couldnt have seen anything especially as I had clothes draped over the boob! But after a while it started to make me uneasy as he was not shifting - but it was still just so hot that i didnt want to interrupt dd's feed before she had finished, plus there were a few other people scattered about so the place wasnt completely deserted - this was about 5pm.

Anyway, eventually he stood up and walked back towards me. He came up to me and said 'Do you live here?' (I was already standing up and gathering my things to leave in reaction) Then he said 'Aren't you scared - it's dangerous here!' SOO creepy. As fast as I could I dumped DD in her pram without even buckling her in, and bolted back to main path where there were more people around. (All this with one boob still hanging out, which luckily i had managed to keep covered with my scarf/cardi!)

I accept I should have gone with my instinct and not stuck around in the park, so in future going to seek out more crowded places and not take the risk to myself and DD of going somewhere quieter for the sake of privacy. But is there any point in reporting to police? Have others had similar experiences? To be fair this would have spooked me out anyway regardless of whether or not i was bfing at the time.

OP posts:
Shagmundfreud · 29/05/2012 18:49

Sounds creepy and worrying.

Please, please report.

jamdonut · 29/05/2012 18:50

Not sure...but Shock very creepy.

dashoflime · 29/05/2012 18:50

Poor you, that sounds horrible :( And yes, report.

TroublesomeEx · 29/05/2012 18:52

I think it would depend on his tone of voice when he asked tbh.

He might have been hanging around because he was concerned about you being there on your own and just alerting you to possible dangers.

He might just have misjudged it but been acting with good intentions...

BabyDubsEverywhere · 29/05/2012 18:53

I really think you should report it. I dont think it has much to do with you feeding either, as he couldnt have seen anything etc. Sounds very odd behaviour, you could give a good description of him to the police which could be of great use if something sinister does happen in the future, not nice to think about i know but true non the less...

agedknees · 29/05/2012 18:53

Can I throw a spanner in the works? Maybe he was concerned for your safety and stayed until you had finished? Then approached you and let you know that area is not safe?

Just a thought.

WorraLiberty · 29/05/2012 18:54

Perhaps there have been attacks/assaults reported in the past?

SleepyFergus · 29/05/2012 18:55

Better to report it than not I think.

wild · 29/05/2012 18:56

definitely report.

OlaRapaceFru · 29/05/2012 18:59

I would report it. I saw a similar thread a couple of days ago on another forum, which is specific to the area where I live (you may be in the same area, although I don't know).

HecateTrivia · 29/05/2012 19:03

Perhaps he knows something about that park that you don't and he was trying to help? But then, why not just come out and say look, X and Y have happened recently, I just thought you should know so that you can decide what you'd prefer to do.

vague "are you scared" stuff is sort of more intimidating than helpful/concerned

senoritachiquita · 29/05/2012 19:05

Thanks a lot everyone. Yes I would say he was definitely creepy rather than trying to give me a genuine warning. I forgot to say that I could see he was just standing still watching me the whole time I was walking away from him.

That was my concern, that though nothing happened to me, something could happen to someone else in future. I just wasn't sure if this is enough for police to take an interest.

OP posts:
senoritachiquita · 29/05/2012 19:06

I'm in east London btw

OP posts:
TroublesomeEx · 29/05/2012 19:07

In that case I'd report it.

They might not do anything, but if they get three or four reports about him then they might then.

If everyone who encounters him decides not to report they'll not know he's there until it's too late. Sad

wild · 29/05/2012 19:07

I reported a man who followed me along a tow path
not sure how much good it did but I felt it was the right thing to do
you have nothing to lose from a phonecall op, and it may be it does some good

maples · 29/05/2012 19:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

skybluepearl · 29/05/2012 19:10

You never know it might be helpful information for the police to have in the future. Try and give a good description.

FeakAndWeeble · 29/05/2012 19:11

Report and give as detailed a description as you can.

senoritachiquita · 29/05/2012 19:14

No it was in Hackney Downs. A shortish guy, 5 foot 4 ish, foreign accent, dark hair mixed with grey, dressed all in black.

Thanks for all the advice, I will def report.

OP posts:
sunshinesue · 29/05/2012 19:17

def report it, it's then up to the police to decide if he's at all a threat or not. Even if he WAS well intentioned (which it doesn't sound like) if he's regularly making women feel threatened/uneasy the police should have a word and let him know he's freaking people out (if they find him).

I had a "weird" encounter fairly recently which was VERY minor and I couldn't figure out what to make of it so didn't bother reporting it but it turned out the same guy had sexually assulted several women that same day (groping rather than something more serious but horrible none the less) Sad

senoritachiquita · 29/05/2012 19:41

god that is horrible sunshine, sorry to hear that.
it's good to get some reassurance tho that minor incidents shouldnt be ignored.

OP posts:
surroundedbyblondes · 29/05/2012 19:46

Report it

Mrspiggy123 · 29/05/2012 19:47

You should report it, the next person might be more vulnerable - please report it

senoritachiquita · 29/05/2012 19:51

Have just reported. They took a note of everything - in fact they advised me it's best to call immediately as and when these things happen so they can send an officer down there.

No indication that anyone else has had problems, but am glad I reported it in any case.

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