Sister in a strop with me, am I actually BU?

[scentednappyhag]

Bit of background- my sister has started to socialise with my friends and I over the last year or so. She never invites me anywhere, but gets very put out if I want to see my friends without her. We always have to go to places she likes, and she will sulk until we give in.

The situation at the moment, my friend and I started planning a night away in June about a month ago. Friend had just gotten out of a long term relationship, I'm tired and feeling rundown with DH on nights and toddler terror DD, so thought we could do with a little break :) we invited my sister, who said she would come.
Then we found out she had booked a week in Greece, flying out on the day we had arranged to go. She then said that we should rearrange our night away for the day before.
I can't do this due to childcare etc, i told her this, so friend and I have booked the hotel for the original night.
Sister is now not speaking to me.
Have I been unreasonable? Should she have everything her way?

No and no.

YANBU - why do you let her dominate your life like this? Was she like this as a child, throwing tantrums and getting her own way as a result?

I hate having her annoyed with me, and she's only 18 so I think I tend to make excuses for her. It's just so wearing having to arrange my social life (or current lack thereof) around her.

yanbu
enjoy you night away!
and show you sis a funny face

Let her stew and you go and have a good time, she's going to Greece ffs. Stop letting her get to you, she needs to know that the world doesn't revolve around her.
We can choose to let these things get to us or choose not to, ultimately you can't control other people's strops. Skip away and have a giggle with your friend.

I know, I know, it drives DH mad that we all pander to her, I'm going to have to break the habit, I can't cope with the stress!

18? So not a child then? I don't know anyone that behaved this spoiled at 18 until I met SIL. Op you do her no favours enabling her spoilt princess attitude, it wins no friends. God forbid but if she ever needed serious help she'd be facing more tumble weed than an old Western.

Why do you think it's ok to make excuses for behavior that is to her detriment? Her behavior is not your fault at all what I mean is why let it go on?

My BF has a sister with Little Princess Syndrome ......and she's 40 now! It's never been any different apparently, with my friend being pushed out and taken advantage of over and over again.

Keep telling my BF to stand up for herself and not be walked over, but I think it is so ingrained now that she keeps giving 'just one more chance' !

She's very different to how I was when I was 18. She lives at home, works casually, sometimes goes into sixth form, is rude and argumentative to my mum, always has money from my dad, expects me to drive her around etc.
I suppose it's just hard to marry that up with being an adult, and therefore still think of her as a child.
You're all right though, I can't carry on babying her. I'll just brazen this situation out, and she'll have to deal with it!
I can't believe she's worrying about missing a night in Birmingham when she's off to Greece all inclusive for a week I won't be able to afford to go abroad for years.

the more you bend to accommodate her, the more she will come to believe that it is her right to have the whole earth revolve around her.

Stick to your plans. It is nice of you to include her. If your plans don't suit her - that's her tough luck.

You are allowing her to dictate to you and to think that she has the right to demand you run everything around her.

You're not doing her any favours by allowing that to continue.

If she doesn't speak to you, then she doesn't speak to you. She'll either get over it or lose a portion of her social life.

That's because in the grand tradition of children everywhere they're allowed to do stuff without you, but you're not allowed to do stuff without them.

And for the love of god, woman, stop being her bloody taxi service!

YANBU but maybe she's lonely.
Or a brat?