to not want to move (house)?

[GoblinPrincess]

We lived in hubby's home town (Wales) for years b4 DCs came along and it was ok. bit rough but good and cheap for 2 20somethings out a lot. We moved a couple of hours away (England) four years ago for his work. Hubby is not happy. Doesn't like our little village. Wants to go "home" to Wales and live near all his family again. He really misses social and family life as we are up here on our own.

Our village is not perfect but is clean, fairly crime-free, has good schools and playgroups and we know lots of nice people in the area. Eldest DC has some good friends he's grown up with. As I said, dhs home town is a bit rough, crime problems, low aspirctions, features highly on the deprivation scale. Good for him being near family but bad for DCs and their chances in life. I want to stay put despite his unhappiness.

AIBU? and WWYD? thanks!

Hmmmm
What about his work?
Is he intending to restart pre-DC social life?
Given that he grew up there (I assume) he seems to have done alright so is it that much of a step back?

onetiredmummy

1. he was offered a good job nearer home b4 we moved but couldn't take it up at the time due to security issues, now resolved. this company would welcome him again so i think that's his plan re work
2. we both have good friends in the town so he sees it as both us haiving a break and maybe going out more cos friends will be available and grandparents or aunties will babysit happily as our DCs are little angels

1. REALLY GOOD QUESTION and I don't know the answer. My husband was one of 20 in his Sixth Form. I was one of 70. Similar sized schools, different catchment areas. He did well as he is massively intelligent in sciences. What if DC are not massively intelligent? What if they are average and thus do much worse in a bad school? This is the thing that gets me, I feel that by moving there, I am letting them down, despite the advantages of having loving family around

YANBU. Where are your family? Two hours isn't that far away, but I can sympathise with wanting to be closer. Personally there is no way I would want to move back to a socially deprived and high crime area though when there are so many nice, clean and pleasant areas to live in. Is there a nicer town closer where he could commute from?

samandi

My family are really not in the picture for reasons very long and boring to explain! In some ways, moving back is tempting cos we would get more help and that would help us have more social time....but it just feels like making my life easier at the expense of my DCs