Long and ranty.
Is this justifiable or is it pregnancy hormones?
I will keep this as short as possible.
I am heavily pregnant with my second child... due by elcs in 2 weeks time. I have a dd who is nearly 9. This is dh's first baby. I have had an easy pregnancy physically but mentally it has been hard as I have suffered antenatal depression linked to previous birth trauma. All that has been mostly sorted now and I am feeling (thankfully) reasonably more positive about the baby etc.
During the pregnancy my mum has moved out to her own house (she used to live with us, in the house that me and dh own). My mum and I have a very strained relationship at the best of times and she will not make any effort to come and see me at my house now - meaning that if I want to see her I have to go to her house. She does live a short car ride away but point being that I don't see why - as a young 63yr old, physically fit and able and still working - she cannot make the effort to come to see me! Since she has moved out I have been for dinner at her house, and she still sees dd regularly (as she was looking after dd 2 afternoons a week when I was working and I have carried on with these arrangements - on maternity leave so dd gets to spend time with Granny and my mum gets to see dd)....
She will pick dd up from school and then i will go and pick dd up from hers. But every time I suggest coming to our house for a tea / dinner she will make excuses and either not turn up or just say no! (She says that it's because she used to live here and it "feels too weird"... I realise it must be strange for her, but we're talking months now... Am I being unreasonable here???)... What is she going to do when I've had the baby and my elcs? Is she not going to bother to come and see me at all? I feel really sad about it. We used to be very close. It's got to the point where I've invited her round for roast dinner, spent £12 on a massive pork joint and literally been about to dish up and she's said no she's not coming.
Then there's my dh and driving... My dh can't drive. We live very rurally. He gets the train to work in our nearest big town, it takes 30 mins. He is learning to drive and I understand he gets very nervous (I am supportive). He says he can only cope with 1 hour lesson at a time, which basically means he is plodding around the rural country roads for an hour, gaining no busy road experience at all. And he's not just started - he's done 35 hours of lessons now. I've told him that in order to expect to pass his test he really would be better to get an instructor to pick him up from his place of work (in the city he would be taking his test in) and do 2 hours lessons of there. As driving around like miss daisy in the countryside is basically lining the pockets of his instructor and not getting him anywhere. He says he is too nervous! I feel like saying (although I won't) well don't spent the £23 a week doing it then and just stop! It's just a waste of money! - I do know how difficult nerves can be, it took me 3 goes to pass myself but seriously he just doesn't understand that he will never be up to test standard just pottering round our local village at 10mph.... (God I sound like such a bitch).
The reason this is probably pissing me off more than it should be is that this week I have effectively been a glorified taxi driver for both him and my ex (taking dd to his mum and dads for him at the weekend, while they didn't offer to do any of the 1 hour and a half drive either way, and my ex doesn't drive either) this weekend. On Sunday there was a road accident so we spent 2 and a half hours in the car driving there and another 2 and a half hours driving back. Only to find exes mum and dad both had their cars in the driveway (so both in!) and neither made any offer to bring dd back even one of the ways for me!
Then yesterday I had to drive dh to a course in town earlier than the trains started so that took 1 hour there, and another hour back (2 hours for me in the car, in the intense heat in a non air conditioned car, pelvis hurting etc- of course dh only had to sit in the car for an hour). I drove home to get a text from him saying that his work colleague (who had a car) basically wouldn't drive him to the train station at the end as he'd hoped so I needed to come and pick him up again!! So 3.30pm and I'm driving for another 2 fucking hours. My dh kept saying "oh I could've got the bus to the train station" and was very apologetic when he realised how flustered I was - but that was WHEN i was there to get him so too bloody late!
So today my dh has gone to get the train to work this morning and he rang me to say that his train is cancelled! - basically hinting at me driving him again! Okay this doesn't happen often - the trains are usually very reliable but I just can't face any more bloody driving. So I said no and he said I seemed annoyed with him. I said I'm not annoyed I'm just knackered and fed up and need to stay home and rest. I asked when the next train is due and it's 30 mins time, so he will be a bit late to work - for the first time ever.... Even if I jumped in the car and drove him he'd be a bit late. Everyone's bloody late occasionally....!!
Am I being a massive moaning moo bag?? Just feeling so fed up with everyone and don't feel anyone is being very sympathetic towards me right now!! I'm even annoyed with dh's work colleague who he's good friends with and knows how heavily pregnant I am not offering to drive him to the (reasonably) nearby train station to save me 2 hours of driving!
Roll on the elcs when I won't be able to fucking drive. I've had enough.