to be sick of diets and diet clubs...calling all skinny people to help!!!

[ChocolateBiscuitCake]

I have always been, in the words of Bridget Jones, 'a little bit fat'. Three children in 4 years (and copious amounts of chocolate biscuit cake ), I am fed up of being fat and all the effects that it has on self esteem, energy, fitness etc. I have two stone to lose and am 35.

I have tried every 'diet' going and fallen off the wagon within weeks. I have been to WW and SW. I am sick of them. They are limiting, I feel hungry and then when I can't have something, I want it and the 'diet' falls apart.

I am binning it all.

And I am going to eat a normal, healthy, balanced diet with small portions. I am going to start exercising and moving more (my personal trainer started today to keep me motivated...I am lazy!).

In the park this morning there were hundreds of thin people exercising - I long to be fit, healthy and 'thin'. What I want to know is:

to all you skinny people - what do you actually eat?
how much exercise do you do?
how much alcohol do you drink? (I suspect this may be where I am going wrong!!!)
any other tips?

Hope you don't mind me posting here - I doubt there are many skinny people in the slimming club section!!!!

Being 'fat' is a bit like being an alcoholic!!!
You have to accept that the only reason you are carrying too much weight is all your fault. You cant blame any other reason, genetics, bad back, no time to exercise etc etc are all utter crap. You are overweight simply because you take in more calories than you burn up!
No one is responsible for what goes in your mouth other than you. That includes what you drink which is where a lot of calories come from, wine, tea coffee etc.
Eat less, move more. Sounds simple. IT IS.
It worked for me and I lost 23lb since November.

I wouldn't say it was quite the same...alcoholism has some really unpleasant characteristics which most overweight people don't subject their friends and families to.

Just saying - you make a good point but I didn't want people to be upset by the comparison iyswim

DrCoconut My DH sounds the same as yours. Doesn't get diets and doesnt see the need why people need to diet ever. He also thinks Im fine (Im too 5'5, but I weigh over 12 stone) and does this and moans if I tell him Im trying to watch what Im eating. I am trying to, but without telling him and its hard, especially when he cooks and most nights involves some carbs in some form whether its pasta (like tonight) or potatoes or sometimes rice. Also I can't exactly weigh my portions either so MFP is out the window for me

Eat less, move more. Sounds simple. IT IS
Thats what I need to do, Ive got the move more sorted, its just the eating less. Its really hard when I genuinely dont like food that is good for me like salad. I often buy fruit, but it gets wasted. I have swapped bread for a wrap though.

Seriously the only thing you need to do is change your eating habits..it's not as difficult as it sounds.

Eat little but often, dont deny yourself any treats - it will just make it seem more like a diet, dont eat late at night, drink a lot more water and go out for a walk every day, if you drive, leave the car at home as often as you can.

The weight took time to go on and it will take just as long to take off so dont stress over it, bin the scales..go by your dress size instead. Dump the low fat stuff, you just end up eating more of it becauase it's "low fat and ok".

I know I've said it before and I'll say it again, dont stress over it, yes a little will power may be needed but not as much as you think and if you want that take away, or ice cream or biscuit, just bloody eat it. Food is there to be enjoyed in moderation and not to be used to torture yourself with.

Seeing as you are going to the gym, you will eat more because you are using up more energy...again..dont be daft and not eat anything you will just make yourself ill.

In this weather just be sure to be careful, it's hot at the moment and even in the gym you dont realise how much you need to drink so always keep a bottle of water or squash close to hand.

Am going to write down what my freaky DH does, because he is skinny (10st 5) and has always been skinny.
Breakfast: Mostly doesn't seem to happen. Sometimes he grabs a banana (which he may or may not eat) sometimes a bowl of cornflakes, sometimes just a latte from starbucks. (Unless its the weekend where you can guarantee eggs/toast/beans/bacon will be involved)

Lunch: Sometimes he eats lunch, sometimes he grabs a sandwich at work, and then doesn't get time to eat it, until 4pm, or then turns up with sandwich still in wrapper.

Dinner: Normal. If dinner is not waiting for him he will eat baked beans on a lot of toast (as a preference).

He claims not to like cake (unless its lemon) does have a weakness for choc. digestives and crisps but out-of-sight truly is out of mind. He does not like cream/creamy things but will scoff a doughnut. He does mostly prefer savoury though; he will scoff epic amounts of shepherds pie/roast dinners. If he's hungover or feeling a bit ill that totally puts him off food whereas I head straight for food to feel better

Currently he's not doing any exercise whatsoever, when he does exercise, he tends to eat more.

I would conclude that most of the time he undereats (occasionally overeating, and doesn't crave sweet stuff - he NEVER eats dessert in a restaurant; too full/ doesn't fancy it

I on the other hand almost never undereat and cannot stop binging on sugar, so despite being more active and eating more green stuff, am fat.

Oh and like flightty he doesn't do set meal times. It drives me mad when he has filled up on toast at 10am - ensuring HE doesn't need to eat until at least 2:30/3pm, when the children will be starving at 12:30 and we are going out for the day

TBH I'm thin lanky but I'm not healthy. I don't do any exercise apart from walking. That's only because I can't drive.

Regards to food I just don't eat much. I do cook almost every night but I never pay any attention to what goes in to food.

I walk everywhere and eat only when I'm hungry. A couple of slices of toast or bowl of muesli in the morning, soup or leftovers for lunch (fairly large portion), packet of crisps or perhaps 1/4 chocolate bar in the afternoon, light evening meal, apple. I eat more throughout the day and less at night.

The point about just eating less is fundamental. It doesn't matter how healthy your food is, if you eat a lot of it you will put on weight. Even super skinny people find that out as they get older.

I totally agree with this from CloversMama:

How are you going to feel after you have eaten it? Previously I didn't feel satisfied unless I felt stuffed after eating. Now I realise that it's actually nicer to go out for dinner, choose something lighter, and leave feeling full but not so full that I wanted to unzip my trousers and lay on the sofa for an hour.

Last year I cut out processed food. Basically anything that has an ingredient in the list that I wouldn't find in my own kitchen. I make all my own bread, treats (ice cream, biscuits, cakes, etc). This approach has had a massive impact on how healthy I feel - even if I'm a bit larger than I was a few years ago my body feels much, much better (though am still slim - 5'8 and size 10/12)

I also know that if I eat shop bought cake or similar I will feel like utter shit afterwards.

Everyone's given you lots of good tips on diet, exercise, etc, so I would just add (from your original questions) that going easy on alcohol does seem a common thread amongst us slimmer people. I probably drink one or two alcohol drinks a week but certainly don't miss it if I don't have any.

Why not start by having a 'dry' month? Drinking also makes you crave junk food/reduces will power...

I haven't read it, but I've heard that Fat is a Feminist Issue is a really good book, really enlightening. Some friends of mine were discussing it and it's all related to the way food is so different for (many) men and women. It was interesting to me because I've never thought about "good" or "bad" foods, eating sugar or fat being "naughty", or self-control being in any way related to food, I don't get the whole "Oh, aren't you good!" thing if I say no to a cake, if I say no it's because I don't feel like eating cake! I guess this is more because I'm slim, my mother is slim, all of the women in my family are so I haven't had that role model. Actually as it happens I'm aware I ought to be more aware of my diet to prevent energy crashes from low blood sugar, and to help me keep weight on as I tend to lose badly at times of stress.

The book can apparently help to see the roots behind these kinds of thinking patterns around food and turn them around.

Eat slowly. Absolutely don't eat standing up, while you're preparing food, absentmindedly. Take supplements BUT NOT IF THEY'RE MARKETED AS WEIGHT LOSS AIDS. However, you may be deficient in some minerals and vitamins which affect your blood sugar control and appetite. Chromium and cinammon are supposed to be good.

Also green tea!

I have been desperately trying to lose weight since DD entered the scene. I was underweight pre-pg and 1 month post had gone up 4 stone

DP who is so thin that he dissappears when he turns sideways has been suggesting cutting out one food group or mealtime after another and I am miserable and fatter. This thread has inspired me to accept that I don't need to throw myself at diets in a wild panic. I was underweight from doing what everyone has outlined above - eating little and often and what I wanted. I started running last week and am trying to go everyday. And as from NOW I am binning diets and all other crap.

Thank you

I'm a size 8 (although slightly heavier atm as I put a bit on just after pg due to pigging out on take aways for a month)
I walk everywhere (minimum 2 miles a day).
I do the majority of the house work.
I don't really exercise, but I have a set of weights so I do a small amount 3/4 times a week (arm curls, hammer curls, squats, lunges, shoulder presses & a few others).

I don't drink...and I have around 6 pints of water a day.

I normally miss a meal (more often than not it's lunch) as I'm still full up from one before. If it's hot I only do liquids (nesquik, protein shakes, herbal teas, soup)...can't stand eating when it's like this!
I don't deny myself junk food.

My DH used to be one one of those bastards who used to be able to eat what he likes but still looks like a jockeys whip...but he hit his mid30's & his metabolism has gone mad & he gained about 20lbs in a couple of months. So I guess you've got to be sensible about it all when it comes to your age?

It's the way you live life rather than a diet for a set amount of time (IYSWIM?).

Good luck OP!

Two things I didnt mention:

first I dont't weigh myself more than about 5 times a year. If my clothes fit and I look Ok that's fine. And if they start to feel tight there's usually a reason for that, and I know it'll go up a bit, come down a bit, whatever - it doesn't matter much.

Second thing is my family. I think I developed the listening to my body thing partly as a result of being among a family who eats far too much - there was always food hanging around, whether it was wanted or not, at my grandparents' house, which made me feel ill, and always constant pressure to eat something all the time even if you said you were full.
So I rebelled.
My parents and sister were not like this, however they still to this day will force themselves to eat when they are full, just because the food is nice, or they don't want to appear rude, or they just want to eat something even if they don't need to.
So when we go out for a meal together it is quite difficult for me to watch my mother saying 'does anyone want some of this, it is huge' and no one wants any so she finishes it though it is a struggle - and my sister saying 'I am totally full, but this pudding looks brilliant so I think I will order it'

That to me just doesn't make sense. I end up not wanting anything because they are stuffing themselves so much, it's offputting. I like people to be comfortable, not to go past their comfort level, it's like watching someone hit themselves on the head with a hammer.

Really strange.

to all you skinny people - what do you actually eat?

I eat all types of food whenever I am hungry.

how much exercise do you do?

I walk no car probably betwee 10 - 20 miles a week average.

how much alcohol do you drink? (I suspect this may be where I am going wrong!!!)

I have never had a pint I drink halfs of cider and get pissed in about 4 of them. I am a massive lightweight but Im only slim so to be expected I supposed.

I don't drink at all btw, if that helps.

Also I dont eat any oats, seeds, lots of healthy styff etc. I just eat whatever I want its about portion size.

I will add dh and db are 5 foot 10 and one is 10 stone the other 10 and a half. They eat whatever they like and as much as they like (mostly junk!) You can eat whatever you like if you are in an active job/have an active lifestyle so if you like food just exercise loads more and you wont need to cut anything out

I am 5'2 and weigh 7 stone 7lbs. This is a normal weight for me, not skinny, but slim.

I eat:
Breakfast - lots of fruit, yoghurt, or porridge
Lunch - varies a lot from day to day. No sandwiches though.
Snacks - fruit, biscuits, bit of cake etc
Dinner - home made meal with fish or meat or sometimes veggie, lots of veg and wholegrain rice or pasta, or wholewheat couscous.

I don't drive and I walk a lot. I have 2 small DCs, and I'm still BFing the younger one. I go to Zumba twice a week.

I think for me the key is that I don't drive, so walk a lot. I know that if I were to have a car I'd be putting on weight for sure.

DH is 6 foot and weights 10lbs. He eats like a horse. But he exercises a LOT. He cycles 5 days a week to week, 20 miles a day. He plays squash a couple of time a week, and he runs half marathons and a marathon recently. He doesn't drive either.

I have pudding after dinner too, a few pieces of chocolate, some ice-cream or some yoghurt and fruit.

DH weighs 10 stone rather!

I don't drive either and walk everywhere.

I really do think this is a bigger factor than a lot of people realise.

If you have a 20 minute/half an hour walk ahead of you and a car sitting on the drive, I imagine it's just too tempting.

Your dh is 6 foot and weighs 10 pounds choceyes he is slim