neighbours climbing over the wall ....

[EndOfTheRoad2011]

AIBU when I say that I am geting fed up of the next door neighbours kids climbing over the wall to get their balls whenever they fancy?? We throw them back over whenever we can but now it has got to the stage they just climb on over and scare the crap out of me when I see something (someone!!) darting across our garden. I know its summer and ball games are a must but feel they could at least ask!

Some great ideas here, thanks guys glad to know that I am not being Unreasonable!

can you put some trellis or something along the top of the wall? it will maybe stop the balls coming over, and if it doesn't at least it would stop them climbing over the wall.

hearts being 8ish is no excuse for rudeness! My DD is 7 and would never in a million years enter someone elses garden...that's because I have taught her boundries...from a very young age...it begins when they go to pick a flower in a garden as you pass...or attempt to walk on someone elses low wall...you explain..."No...that's someone's garden.."

Simple.

OP yanbu of course...I would put trellis up and a creeping plant.

Mine climb right over the trellis.

*This is into next door's garden when invited to play with their DD.
**DH built the trellis which means a few gorillas could hang on it & it still wouldn't break.

Not sure if OP can put up a trellis unless she has responsibility for that boundary wall.

I am duly impressed if I am the only one who ever hiked over walls as a child to nick fruit retrieve a ball. What a lot of dull good-two-shoes you all were.

Tell, dont ask. Next time you see a ball in your garden (you will have to keep an eye out during half term) take it round to the neighbours and talk to the parents.

• Tell them that the children need to knock at the door to get their ball back
• Tell them that after 5pm they will have to wait until the balls are returned at your convenience later on in the evening/following morning. Explain why.

As you say the children are old enough to know better. Dont be rude but do be clear that they arent doing you a favour by not coming into your garden uninvited.

adventures, we used to as well! but we had kids next door of a similar age and it was just a given that we'd climb into each others gardens.

Exactly thisis

I'm sure my football mad DS has kicked a few wrong-uns in his time. And TBH my garden was always so full of kids, a few more made no difference, plus I knew them all. DH was football coach, so he was probably more responsible than most for the bad passing.

Very rude of them, Our next doors kids kick their ball over, I let the dogs out and the dogs eat it since the little buggers kept climbing the fence, our dogs are also on tie downs (gives the dogs plenty of run) right next to their fence now so would love to see them climb over into the faces of to German shepherd dogs!

We live between two families with five football and cricket-mad boys between them, and I had always assumed it was normal for their kids to climb into our garden to get their footballs/cricket balls/basket balls back rather than all the fuss of ringing the doorbell and asking me. But then my neighbours don't mind my kids climbing into their gardens to fetch balls (or just to see what is going on when they get bored...).

I prefer it that way - IMO gardens are there to be used and played in, and the neighbours children are more than welcome in mine.

Houseonthecorner: I totally agree the OP is right, especially as her daughter is being adversely affected. The parents of the children should sort it out.

My only quibble would be that children playing ball games might be thoughtless and loud ... but at least they are out doing healthy things which is a good thing. If it is just that they are thoughtless then coming down with a heavy hand will just alienate them. An agreement would be better for them all in the long run.

If they don't go along with it would be the time to borrow a large dog or plant a prickly hedge

Megalosaurus

Really like your rule of leaving ball till they throw it back.

I am also fed up of next doors ball, I have lots of little knick knacks in my decking, garden, that I dont want smashed by the blighters ball. He tried to force his way through the fence the other day that my DH had spent two hours reparining.

At first I had no prob with it - but now its about two balls every bloody day. I hear Mum saying dont kick the ball but he doesnt listen.

If my child was a repeat ball over wall offender - i would take balll away - SIMPLES!

tHE THING is - when you also add ball over fence to her cats leaving all my pots covered in deep DEEP cat SHIT, as well as her smoke flooding into my bedroom window at night - the constant shouting at the kids, the other sides smoke, music - it becomes too invasie

DH and I discussed it last night and have decided to not go ott about it but just mention dd is finding it a little scary that there are people in our garden when they shouldn't be and that every evening we would throw all balls back over ready for the next day :o that due to dd's needs we are not able to throw them over straight away but prefer if the children didn't come over themselves ... also because our garden is a bit of a building site at the moment due to be landscaped in a few months and that it is quite dangerous with piles of bricks, scaffolding etc around so hopefullly parents will understand where we are coming from. Thanks for all the great advice.

I think what we are finding difficult is by not dealing with it now eventually when our garden is complete and dd can get her wheelchair out there will she be safe of flying balls - a hard tennis ball is something she will not be able to defend off !

I hate bad mannered children so I'd roar at the little darlings and scare the shit out of them. They wouldn't come back into my garden!

YANBU, I wouldn't want kids climbing over my wall. On a serious note, it sounds daft but if they fell off your wall and sustained an injury you would no doubt be held responsible. My own children would never have been allowed to climb over a wall to fetch their ball, they had to wait for the neighbours to throw it back (it taught them to be more careful). The only exception was my next door neighbour on one side, who was very elderly and they were allowed (after me asking her permission) to walk up her path and pick up their ball without knocking and disturbing her. However, I would then confiscate the ball for the rest of the day. It didn't take long before they learnt not to throw or kick it so high.

instead of borrowing a dog can we borrow you Major ? ;)

My step dad used to burst the balls of repeat offenders and then chuck the deflated ball back over.

This is exactly why my boys do not have footballs in the back garden. I really like my neighbors and they have the most beautiful garden, I would hate for them to ruin something.

The footballs stay in the cupboard, most days in the summer they go to the park to play.

I don't think DCs and footballs in back Garden are a good idea unless you have a much larger than average garden.

Of course, EndOfTheRoad. I do charge, but the currency's only tea so as long as you've plenty of English Breakfast I'll get the job done in no time.

YANBU - however, I think I would be more annoyed by the doorbell going every 2 seconds!!! When our ball goes over I tell my children to play with something else until the neighbours pass it over. This discourages them from getting too excited with the ball as it doesn't get passed back until the next time the neighbours are in the garden. They always pass it back though eventually.

kettle's on :o