To get pissed off at dp and this whole phone malarkey

[GetTheeToANunnery]

Dp keeps getting wound up cos I don't always answer my phone straight away, sometimes he has to ring 2-3 times before I'll find it and pick up. Other times I haven't heard it go at all and I ring back once I've realised. I don't like making sure my phone is on me 24/7, I hardly get any calls anyway.
Anyway, we had a huge silly row about it the other day as other family members have mentioned (in jest) how hard it can be to get hold of me sometimes and how I should really make sure it's on me ALL THE TIME.

I get pissed off cos I will sometimes text him in the morning or whatever and not get a reply till he comes home and I ask him if he got my message. I've given up getting wound up about that though as he's a busy man and if I really need him I can ring his work phone.

Am I really being unreasonable to not agree to make sure my phone goes everywhere with me? I'm a sahm btw if that makes a difference.

Argh it's all so silly and petty but it's driving me nuts

YANBU not to have your phone on all the time and be at his beck and call however I suggests he finds someone else to be his 'in case of emergency' contact

As long as there isn't a school desperately trying to get hold of you YANBU.
I often find a couple of messages on the home phone and some missed calls and texts on my mobile.

Nope, no school. Most of the time when he rings it's to tell me he's on his way home. Big wow, thanks for ringing 50 million times to let me know!

Don't tempt me cassette

You say if you really need him you can get hold of him on his work phone. What happens if he REALLY needs you from that angle I can see his point. I am the same though I dont take my phone everywhere and constantly miss calls as it is usually on silent.

How on earth did we survive before mobile phones?

I find it useful to keep my phone on me so that I can be contacted in a genuine emergency.

OTOH I would resent any expectation that I would be expected to drop whatever I was doing and instantly answer any and every call. That, IMO, is disrespectful of my time and implies that I have nothing more important to do.

Seriously - what is so urgent that everyone has the right to expect an instant response? Life threatening situations are not that frequent in your family, surely?

Many years ago when mobiles were only just taking off my then employer insisted that she had my mobile number. She would then have a go at me because it wasn't switched on/I didn't answer when she tried to call me to ask me to come in earlier or work on a day off!

Exactly 3litlefrogs! It all blew up when I was cleaning the guinea pigs out t'other day. I could hear my phone ringing but thought it can wait till I'm done.
If it was a real emergency then he could ring the house phone or his mum who lives 5 mins from us.

Sometimes I just simply cba to speak to anyone, is that not allowed now?

I carry a mobile phone for work. The voice mail message states quite clearly that it is a messaging service, and calls will be answered at certain times on certain days. It also gives a number for urgent calls.

If I answered it every time it rang I would get nothing done.

Everybody wants everything instantly nowadays. It creates an awful lot of stress. It isn't against the law to not answer the phone or the doorbell if you are busy.

I think yanbu - it's rude for someone to assume that just because they want to speak to you, that you are equally wanting to speak to them right at that precise moment. No one has a right to commandeer your time and expect you to drop everything to be at their beck and call.

My df used to ring before he came home. He had an agreement with dm that he would let it ring 4 times then hang up, so she knew it was him, but he didn't have to pay for a call. Of course that was with a phone box not a mobile. Could you suggest he does the same?