We are all winner bollocks

[thebody]

So it's sports day. Take mindees and watch, lovely atmosphere and of course lovely weather.

She ran her heart out and won, she came first, cue me whooping and clapping and big well done hug.

Medals given out and EVERYONE gets one.!!!

So her little victory( and she very shy) is not applauded or acknowledged by the school in any way.

I am for teaching children that sometimes you dont win, sometimes you do. I think it's Important to teach children to win or loose( yes loose the race) with grace.

Aibu

A someone said earlier, your child did win, in front of the whole school. And the child who came last was last (ditto). And all the children and parents can see that...

If your school scrapped races altogether and had a non-competitive sports day, well I'd think that was a bit unreasonabl...

But feeling aggrieved because everyone got a medal...? YABU

But my Ds does not excel in class either, he knows he is the slowest at running, the children know who is quickest, sports day would just be another miserable day for him if it was just about the winners

YANBU. And well done to the little one for winning.

At my kids' primary and secondary they are/were split into houses (these are state schools). Normally they compete on behalf of their house. I can't remember if there were individual prizes (there were point awarded) but the winning house would all get a medal - obviously the kids would know who had won the race etc and achieved the most house points. They also had a large number of team events - including obstacle races so even the non athletic could take part and hopefully enjoy themselves.

I agree with you. I was dreadful at sports' day and never had a chance of coming first. (except the time they ran out of eggs for the egg and spoon race and I was given a bean bag ) For some children it was the only chance they had to shine.

I disagree that there was kudos for a 5yo winning in front of everyone. I suspect very few would be able to tell you who won that race within about 10 minutes. More likely to end up with jealous child saying "you didn't win... XX won".

You can celebrate everyone taking part and winners. At the infant school each child has 1 competitive race at which they are given a little card with 1, 2 or 3 on and the rest are house races and at the end they all get a sports' day ribbon with "well done" on.

I have no strong feelings one way or the other, just an observation

At DDs old school when they did a competitive sports day 50% of the Y/6 girls wouldn't take part, but whe they changed to a teams based ' its a knockout style sports day', they all would.

I think particularly as they get older, we have to take notice of what the children want, not just us as parents

I love that quote in the movie 'The Incredibles' -

Mom ''Everybody's special'
Son '' Which is another way of saying nobody is''

My ds2 has physical disabilities and can't run although he can walk fairly slowly. Even I think the non-competitive sports day is daft. Let the sporty children have their moment. As long as DS2 and other children who struggle in this area aren't humiliated. At my seconday school sports day you got a point for turning up to your event and then 1 point for coming 8th, 2 points for coming 7th etc. I was rubbish at sports so I did the discus as hardly anyone wanted to do that so I got a few points while still coming last.

I agree, its unrealistic and doesn't prepare children for real life. You don't pass exams, job interviews, driving test etc just because you 'have taken part'.

I even feel the same about birthday parties, when siblings and cousins get presents too or blow the candles. Fgs, yes sometimes its all about one person, the winner or the birthday girl, and you just have to accept it.

I agree - medals for winners (perhaps second & third too??) and "well done"/participation certificates for the rest.

Love the rosy view that competitive sport teaches us how to be good losers.

Without exception the most successful sportspeople in the world are very, very bad losers.

It's the will to win that makes them such good competitors
but rather less successful as human beings. Ask Tiger Woods' ex-wife and the legions of other people caught up in the orbit of a winner.

Despite that I believe that OP's DD deserves her medal and I speak as someone who runs like she has a broken leg.

In my usual two minds about this one.

I do think that kids deserve their day in the sun and those non-competitive sports days should be used as torture. I'd confess to anything after having to watch kids "participating in modules".

But - I remember when I was at school in the 1970s that sports day was horrible. I was terribly uncoordinated and came last in everything. I went to a small village school and it was so humiliating coming in last by some distance in the running race and some (evil) parents laughing and pointing. It was all made worse by the fact that one year there was a big prize table for winners and runners-up. I remember (this still shames me) bursting into tears because I was the only child with no prize at all. It's all very vivid 40 years later!

As a Mum of a child with physical disabilities who can't run but can walk slowly I would love it as she will likely never 'win' in her own right. A medal for the winner and a sticker for the rest seems more reasonable though.

tiiytapes read gramercy's post to understand why they are not forced to take part!