Cycling home alone

[SuperCycler]

Yesterday I was cycling home from school with DS(8) and DD(6). I wanted to pop into the local shop to get a couple of bits. The DC were not in the mood for a shop. On the basis that the shop is close to home (5 min leisurely walk through residential area), there are only a couple of very quiet roads to cross and DH was at home - I said they could cycle home together and I'd meet them there. (They are both able cyclists - regularly cycle to school a mile+ away and go on 6-10 mile family cycle rides)

That was the AIBU (or WIBU bit)?

In the spirit of not drip feeding I'll now say what happened next.

There was a couple of other people in the shop so I was a good few minutes there. I then cycled home and found the DC were not there (and hadn't been past according to neighbour's children who were playing outside).

There are 2 possible routes shop-home, so I assumed they must have gone the "other" way, so started cycling back that way to see where they were. On my way back, DS came cycling up to tell me that DD had fallen off her bike, and wouldn't cycle any more and a lady was bringing her home. Sure enough, just behind him was DD with a woman who was wheeling her bike. The woman basically repeated DS's story (DD had fallen off her bike, had a cry and wouldn't get on it again) and said she wanted to check she got home safely. I thanked her and that was that. (DD wasn't hurt- just banged her knee, and got straight back on her bike when I met her).

Because something went "wrong" I am now doubting that I should have let them go off alone. Although half of me says that they handled the situation well. DS stayed with DD until he saw me. Worst case scenario was that they could have stayed where they were and I would have found them pretty quickly. (I actually suspect that without an adult there to help, DD would have cycled home anyway once she'd got over her hurt).

Interested in any opinions?

At that age I'd let them walk home, but definitely not cycle.

And I'm pretty laid back about stuff like this.

I agree with sarky - I wouldnt let them but then I dont let DS walk home (only coz there is a big main road to cross).

I know you say they are competent cyclists but IMO they are still pretty young to be cycling on their own.

I would/did let mine do that sort of cycle home at that age. And occasionally things did happen like falling off. But I don't see that as something "going wrong" - it's a little gentle practice for coping with minor incidents. She fell off, hurt herself a bit, but no real harm was done. And as you say if there hadn't been an adult she'd have probably just gone on home.

i wouldn't have a problem with that.

I'd happily let an 8yo walk/cycle home but the sticking point here is the accompanying 6yo. I feel very uncomfortable putting an 8yo child in charge of and resposible for a 6yo. So for that reason I think YABU.

YANBU. You don't suddenly give children free reign to do what they want and go where they want unaccompanied - it all happens gradually. Things do go wrong occasionally. Children need to learn to deal with the unexpected and they can only do that when the unexpected happens.

This is really minor. They were close to home and you knew when to expect them back and where to look for them when they weren't there. Your DS did very well. Six isn't too young to be accompanied for a very short stretch by an eight year old.

Sounds fine to me.

I think 6 is too young to be cycling on their own. Walking is fine, but I think there is just too much than can go wrong when cycling, particularly crossing roads. If on or pushing a bike, you can't jump back onto the pavement if a driver does do something stupid.

I'm not risk averse. My own, extremely sensible daughter started cycling on (london) roads at age 6, but still a year later there are moments when I've had to bellow instructions at her when I've seen there might be a problem ahead. I wouldn't want to put that responsiblity for care onto an 8 year old.

YANBU all perfectly assessed and they dealt really well with this little crisis. All good!

I think yanbu. You know your children and your area well enough to be able to make those calls.

All sounds fine to me. :-)

YANBU

I guess you could have told them which one of the two routes home you wanted them to take. Other than that I think it's been a good lesson learnt for both your children :)

Our rules was that ds couldn't cycle out on the roads until he had taken his cycle course at school - he is 10. That was 6 hours out on busy roads and they didn't pass anyone who wasn't safe.

were not was

I wouldn't let an 8 and 6 year old cycle home on their own. In fact when my DDs were at school. The school advised against any child who hadn't passed a cycle proficiency test cycling to and from school. They took this test at age 10 so no one under 10 cycled on their own.