To want to do my DP serious bodily harm??

[FarelyKnuts]

It's 6.30am! On a Sunday!!
For the past 5 hours I have slept in 5 minute snatches due to the fact that she WON'T STOP FECKING SNORING
I nudged, I gently rolled her off her back, I stuck a pillow over my head.. All to no avail.
I don't believe in nor condone violence in any way,shape or form but I spent quite a significant part of the night in a murderous rage.
To top it all off I gave up a few minutes ago and got up, she woke up and asked why I was getting up so early and when I informed her it was so I didn't suffocate her because she wouldn't stop snoring she informs me that's impossible as she has been awake half the night!!
AIBU to want to kill her now? :o

Flowing?! Is this something I need to be aware of as I thought water misting in the face was bad enough!!

openerofjars I have one of those too. He's on his last warning - one more time and I throw the clock.

gumby somewhere between 1 and 2 every fecking night.

2 is less common but it is always 1 and usually one and a bit

BLOWING not flowing (although pissing on him MIGHT work).

Oh my God, I am so happy (in a murderous way) that it's not just my DH who snores all night then claims he's had a terrible night's sleep! Really? You sound like a fecking steam train while you're awake? Genius!

Countless times I've slept on the sofa, I can still hear him through the (concrete) ceiling sometimes.

My DH has an Olympic gold medal in snoring. Also sleep-twitching, sleep-mumbling, sleep-shouting, sleep-kicking and sleep-flinging-himself-out-of-bed-commando-roll-stylee. His one saving grace (the only reason he's still alive) is because if I wake him up with a judicious elbow to the head ribs he will uncomplainingly go into the spare room. Which is fine, except he'll be asleep and snoring through the wall again before I'm even close to getting back to sleep.

Admittedly, the commando roll over the edge of the bed can be quite amusing to watch.

I have one of them Fireandashes I was pregnant for most of last year and eventually sent him to the spare room because, aside from being unable to sleep beside a chainsaw when the ticking of our clock kept me awake, he grabbed me, rolled me over and pinned me down on my back. Twice. Because I'd fallen down a crevasse. And I had a sizeable bump for him to be lying on and pushing around!

The sleep talking can be fun though, he agrees to lots of things when he sleeps

YANBU mine does sleep talking, mumbling, snoring, twitching, moaning, wanking yes wanking ASLEEP, sometimes he just holds it like a comfort toy

He will feck off to the spare room or sofa when I ask though.

I am 35 weeks pregnant and snore like a train. I even wake myself up. I have to prop myself up on 3 pillows just to be able to breathe. And I wear those "breathe right" nose strips.
So I sleep in the spare room. My DH can hear me through the floor but at least can sleep through it.
He's talking about inviting his brother for the weekend this weekend. I was like "are you going to share a bed with him? because otherwise you will have to share with me!".
No way would I inflict my snoring on him if I don't have to [crosses fingers it will stop when I've had the baby].

Totally understand you wanting to kill your partner.