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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

4 Bed Semi or 3 Bed Detached???

75 replies

littledetails · 16/05/2012 19:33

My partner and I are looking to purchase a house together, but cant decide on what to buy. Ideally we would like a 4 bed detached but finances wont stretch to this.

My partner has two dd's aged 6 (who he see's every other weekend) and I have a dd aged 7 and a ds aged 4. My partner would prefer a 4 bed semi so that his dd's get a bedroom to themselves. I however would prefer a 3 bed detached and have all the girls share, which they prefer to do when they sleep at my partners house (he has a 4 bed house and my dd has her own room when we stay).

My partner is concerned that as the girls grow up they will want more space and wont want to share. I think if we buy a house with an attached garage that we could easily convert the garage into a bedroom for either my dd or his dd's or even convert the lost if money allows.

I personally think a detatched house would have a greater selling value than a semi. We also have an active (and noisy, when we dont have the children)!!!! sex life and I think this would become very limited in a semi, as most semi's are mirror image and bedrooms back on to one another.

Would really appreciate any view/comments.

Thanks

OP posts:
jazzchickens · 16/05/2012 20:42

Having experienced nightmare neighbours in the past - I would definitely go detached.

ivykaty44 · 16/05/2012 20:48

I would go for a 4 bed house with three teen girls and the possability of one or both wanting to come and live with you (this wouldn't be uncommon) it would be a squash in a three bed semi.

What I would have though was just as important was the space down stairs so that the 6 of you are not on top of each others and have some space to go to.

A 4 bed semi wouldn't be difficult to sell as there will always be larger families of one kind or another that will not worry about the fact it is a semi over room inside

Jinsei · 16/05/2012 21:11

Detached. You can extend it.

sue52 · 16/05/2012 21:20

Detached with scope for an extension or loft conversion.

BeeInMyBonnet · 16/05/2012 21:21

Def detached. I'm feeling sorry for your potential neighbours and the noisy sex. I hate to ask...actually I dont think I willGrin

ScarlettAlexandra · 16/05/2012 21:24

i live in a four bed detached and being new there is no room at all to extend.

the three bed detached are same on the development. so its not always an option to extend.

anyfuckersfanjo · 16/05/2012 21:27

If you are noisy while having sex please buy a detached. My neighbours are so loud every night its Embarrassing.

MsVestibule · 16/05/2012 21:33

I've lived in terraced houses for 20 years and only had one set of noisy neighbours. I really don't think they're as prevalent as people think.

Under your circumstances, I'd go for the 4 bedroom semi. I guess this will mean more downstairs space too; is that a consideration? And seriously, why is the resale factor even an issue? You sound as though you're planning on staying there for a number of years, so surely your requirements are far more important than how easy it may/may not be to sell in 2025?

Oh, and soundproof your bedroom.

ifeelloved · 16/05/2012 21:36

I think you need to look at both. There will be some 4 bed semis that will be better than a 3 bed detached. Just look at both and then you will get the right house.

ScarlettAlexandra · 16/05/2012 21:37

you could always get a ball gag lmao Wink

lilbreeze · 16/05/2012 21:50

I have a 4 bed semi and no way would I swap for a 3 bed detached. We very rarely hear our neighbours even though they have 2 noisy children - I think the amount of noise will depend on the age and construction of the house.

peanutbutter38 · 16/05/2012 22:10

Detached, without a doubt. We moved from a semi to a detached about five years ago and it's fantastic. I was always paranoid about the neihbours hearing our kids, our telly, our music etc. and it's very nice to know that the kids can get up early on a Sunday morning and make a racket without bothering the neighbours. And the total lack of noise from surrounding walls is bliss. I sleep better and I'm happier. Always buy detached if you can.

marriedinwhite · 16/05/2012 22:28

I'd go for the one you fall in love with and make it into a home, providing it has the scope to provide enough space for the teenage girls all of you as the girls get bigger.

Not sure about the sex life - doesn't it concern you that the girls will hear you as much as or more than the neighbours. In which case, what does it matter if it's detached or a semi.

A lot depends on the type/age of the house. We live in a semi that's so close to the next pair it's more of a terrace anyway - and I don't have the cheek to refer to it as a semi. There isn't space to get a broom between the houses.

marriedinwhite · 16/05/2012 22:29

Oh, and I meant to say - we don't hear our neighbours and they don't hear us and we ds and his teenage chums can be noisy.

porcamiseria · 16/05/2012 22:35

you are even asking? get/make room for his kids too. 4 bed

mynewpassion · 16/05/2012 22:36

Would your converted garage have heating and air conditioning? Sorry but your need a 4 bedroom.

DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 16/05/2012 22:38

4 beds. While it's ok for the 3 girls to share now, in a few years time they'll be really cramped all sharing one bedroom and that's hardly fair, given you have a choice.

Also thanks for oversharing, you horndog, you Grin

Pooka · 16/05/2012 22:42

4 bed semi.

We have one. Actually also have a loft bedroom.

They are halls adjoining. Upstairs the smallest bedroom and the bathroom are attached. The other rooms aren't. We're in the loft, so a whole floor away from dcs and no neighbour (neighbours haven't converted).

FairyPenguin · 16/05/2012 22:49

Unless you have specific properties in mind, then I would view any that look good and then compare. Houses vary so much in terms of room size, layout, etc. Also, if you get a fixed idea in your head of what you're looking for, it'll be harder to find IYSWIM. Look for any semis or detached with at least 3 beds in your area, then take it from there. Hopefully, you'll know the right one when you see it, and you'll both agree on it too! Good luck.

smalltown · 16/05/2012 22:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CallMeAl · 16/05/2012 22:54

yabu

Devora · 16/05/2012 23:07

4 bed semi. Like mine - I luuuurve my neighbours Smile

bobbledunk · 16/05/2012 23:19

Go detached, it's more private and you can always extend it. Most people may be fine but you have no control over who your neighbours will be, it would be a nightmare to get stuck next to a drummer or people who have all night loud parties every night.

Then there's your noisy sex life, you want to be able to continue that...Grin

LadyKooKoo · 17/05/2012 08:14

Why has no one mentioned your DP's children in response? How are they meant to feel knowing that they are relegated to a campbed in your DD's bedroom when they come to visit every other weekend? What happens if they decide they want to live with DP as they get older? It is all very well saying you could extend into the loft, at the back, over the garage but any one of these could take you another five years to save the money for. Stop being selfish and go for the 4 bed.

Mishy1234 · 17/05/2012 08:20

Having been held at the mercy of annoying (not necessarily bad) neighbours in the past, I would say detached without a doubt. I can't abide internal noise and no matter how old the house, you always seem to get it to some degree. Also, if there's enough land around the house you can always extend it to get the extra room you want when/if the money becomes available.