To expect to be consulted on planning major family events...?

[siriusly]

If a major event was happening in your family, hatches, matches, dispatches, etc would you expect the organiser to ask you first if day was ok before sending out invites? i would - just did a big family day out for 20 for Aunt's 80th, and asked all parties beforehand to send an email with dates that were non-negotiable so that I could plan event. Everyone co-operated - day went well. Now, my sibling, has planned a communion and not asked anyone beforehand and is pissed off that we, and others, can't attend. AIBU or AIHighly and perhaps too Overorganised??

So it's a christening, not a communion then? First communion only happens when you're around 7 I think.

Dispatches cant be planned that much- often depends when the vicar/crematorium's got a free slot.

YAB (a bit) U but so is she.

I wouldn't expect the organiser to ask me first if the day was OK, but equally (assuming they hadn't done so) I wouldn't expect him/her to be pissed off if I couldn't attend.

Some churches only do baptisms 4x a year.

1st Communion is once a year at the most and not at all if you are 9 months old

You plan deaths in your family OP?

And even if you mean funerals they still have to be up to the minister/crematorium/church etc.

.

U don't get on do u???

Unless she's booked it for 13 years hence? In which case she's right to be peed off you're busy! -

That made me laugh out loud!

i like the idea of a planned dispatch.....

We try and be flexible when it comes to sorting a date for Baptisms, but when you have lots of requests as a Vicar you have to ask families to agree on the same Sunday or it would be baptisms every week.

There is no way everyone in everyone's families will be available, so we know people will be upset at some point.

As for Confirmations, we have to book the Bishop months, if not a year ahead. Expect it's the same for first communions.

However a family party for Great Aunt Mabel is just as hard to arrange as so many of our family works Sundays!

I must be overly organised and emotionally sensitive to needs of my family

I don't ever say this, but ROFL! If I was consulted on every event in my family I would spend my life never doing anything else, ever. Check with the really important people, everyone else will come if they can.

YABothBU

So do I idealism ...

YABU.

We're planning DDs christening. We've checked with grandparents and godparents. That's all. Everyone else will just get a invite.

i like the idea of a planned dispatch.....

"Hi, sorry for the mass email. I'm thinking of dying soon. Can you email me and let me know which of these three dates you can make so I can plan my funeral. It will be in Central London and there will be drinks and canapes afterwards. TIA"

And then fond relative showing up with lethal injection "Look, don't be so unreasonable -- you know the only day everyone can make for your funeral is Thursday week, and we need to allow enough time for the funeral directors to get everything sorted..."

And let's not forget the "planned hatches" either!

Everything timed to military precision.

Casey - the fond relative would no doubt start an AIBU thread.

I wish I could plan a hatch!! Can I book June 5th please? About midday, lasting roughly an hour and pretty painfree. Thanks

I'll just organise that for you then McKayz

Thank you!!

McKayz, I can't make that day. How about September 3rd? I know it's a bit later than you wanted, but on the plus side the weather is normally lovely at that time of year.

If I'm still pregnant on September 3rd I might dispatch myself!!

Casey - it's been organised and I've consulted relatives and it's on The Spreadsheet!

It's not my fault you had a defective spreadsheet...

I woul not ask peoples availabiliry, but then if I wasn't giving much notice to people I would not be annoyed if they couldn't make it.