Not sending dn to a party she hasn't been invited to?

[Muchadoaboutnuthing]

Ds and dd have been invited down to the neighbours this evening, their son has made his communion and they're having a small party, bouncy castle etc. Dhs neice is here, MIL was supposed to be looking after her but decided to leave her here and go and get her hair done instead. Dh thinks we should send all 3 kids down to the party, I think its rude to send dn when she hasn't been invited. AIBU?

I would phone them and explain and see if she is ok to go. Seems a bit unfair to send the other 2 and not even try to see if she can!

I would definitely ask first, but I think it would be unusual for someone to say no under these circumstances.

If you ask the neighbour without your DCs being there (turning up with your DN with puppy dog eyes might be a bit cheeky ) I don't think that'd be rude

This is one of the very few occasions where I think it would be ok to ask

Just explain the situation

For all you know, your neighbour could be very upset that you didn't mention it.

I would phone or visit a few hours before the party and check if it is ok for dn to tag along.

I don't see anyone minding one more at a party, how old is dn and will you be staying?

I'd give them a ring, let them know the situation and ask if she can come along. Maybe offer to help them out with a few extra sandwiches or snacks if that would make you feel better?

Personally if I was the communion child's mum I'd be quite happy with a couple of unexpected children as long as they were well behaved (wouldn't be very Christian to turn them away now would it?)

How were your DCs invited? Phonecall or printed invitation?
Yep, give them a ring out of the DCs earshot.

No i'm not staying but the house is only 2 doors away. I might pop down before the kids and check.
Good idea about sending stuff down, I've actually got some mulitpacks of sweets and crisps from a party a couple of weeks ago. Thanks.