Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to feel almost bullied by schools/packed lunches?

136 replies

SufferingSaffy · 09/05/2012 18:05

Generally I'm quite supportive of schools trying to get childrens' lunch boxes in a healthier shape.
My DSs usually contain something like:
wholemeal cheese or ham sandwich
yoghurt
fruit
bread sticks/crackers.

(I used to send a cake bar instead of crackers but it got sent back home so many times for being chocolate)

The school are on yet another healthy lunches mission. This time they want to see all packed lunches contain 2 pieces of fruit/vegetable. They are also encouraging children to eat something other than sandwiches and will award children with an alternative to sandwiches with a certificate for healthy eating.

I personally find my DCs 1 piece of fruit enough. We like sandwiches in this house so why should they discourage it?

*and don't get me started on the ice cream/ cakes they dish up with school dinners.

AIBU? Go on, I can take it probably

OP posts:
CrumpettyTree · 09/05/2012 22:52

Swap over to school dinners so the dc can have ice cream and cakes every day. Simples! :o

ReelAroundTheFountain · 09/05/2012 23:06

I am so fortunate that my ds's school lets you send pretty much anything in as part of packed lunch (only rule - no cans/bottles/sweets) and I would really resent it if someone told me I couldn't send in the odd treat (like a fairy cake/bit of popcorn etc) when I judge it to be ok.

Where these strict rules apply is a typical lowest common denominator approach. Rather than just dealing with the children who have total rubbish in their lunch box every day.

Adversecamber · 09/05/2012 23:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hopandaskip · 09/05/2012 23:55

...wondering what they would do if confronted by a toffee apple.

5Foot5 · 10/05/2012 00:27

I am with ConferencePear on this. We see so many threads on here about school lunch nazis police and I am just astonished that people are prepared to put up with it. Can you not put a note in the DCs lunch box to say that it is NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. Can mumsnet not have a campaign to tell the schools to keep their interfering and often ill-informed noses out of our DCs lunch?

xxmush1983xx · 10/05/2012 01:23

My DD1 is diabetic, so thought I would give her some diet caffiene free cola as a treat one day, it got sent back?? Whereas before her diagnosis she got a sweet once a week, no hassle. I'm obviously aware diet drinks are still bad for your teeth, but I object that I can't give her a sugar free treat but could give her sweets??

sunnydelight · 10/05/2012 03:04

YANBU. My attitude is that it's none of the school's damn business what I put in my kids' lunchboxes (outside of following the "no nuts" policy) as they have no idea what other food they eat in the day. Luckily our school doesn't police lunch boxes.

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief · 10/05/2012 05:21

I'm usually very anti-suing/ "it's a breach of my human rights" moaning, but I would love someone to take this all the way, as I am sure there is no legislation that says that the school has the right to confiscate food and send it back.

There are no such things as good and bad foods, only good and bad diets.

The birthday cake example up thread is an example of how this just goes insane. There are 30 kids in a class, so max 3 birthdays a month. It's not like they're getting a cake every day.

Moderation in everything.

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief · 10/05/2012 05:22

ps, I bet the teachers all get wankered on their birthdays and get a kebab on the way home Grin

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief · 10/05/2012 05:24

......and another thing......a sandwich of say, brown bread, ham and pickle/tomato is a hell of a lot more balanced than their suggestion of potato salad made with blardy mayo.

....god, this gets my goat. I dont even have school aged kids......

BratinghamPalace · 10/05/2012 05:45

Problem with this rubbish is that lunches are treated as though they are the only thing the child eats. The overall diet of the child is important. If mine have oatmeal for breakfast with a bit of fruit, a sambo for lunch and a piece of meat with a few spuds and veg for dinner I get really annoyed when they send home two pieces of chocolate home. ESPECIALLY when they give them bloody apple juice out of a carton that expires in 2112 as a valid alternative. There, thank you for that have been dying to say it for ages!

FamiliesShareGerms · 10/05/2012 06:04

This thread reminds me why I will not give in to my son's begging for packed lunches rather than the pretty good school dinners he currently has. I would go mad trying to come up with stuff every day that was edible and allowed.

hotheels · 10/05/2012 06:08

Yanbu! Fuck all wrong with a wholemeal sandwich at all!! we are sandwich people too if dd9's school started to send part of her lunch home uneaten there would be word war 3

knitknack · 10/05/2012 06:53

Come in guys you know it's not the TEACHERS that set these silly rules don't you?! teachers are there to TEACH and even then we're subjected to all sorts of rules/paperwork.

knitknack · 10/05/2012 06:53

On

naughtymummy · 10/05/2012 07:09

I don't understand why this is such a big deal on here. Our school is the same. I meet them at 3:15 with my homemade cakes, so what ? Obviously it is different if there are special dietary requirements, but for most kids nothing terrible is going to happen if they don't get their homemade flapjack till teatime. OP I am assuming the school aren't banning sandwiches ? So just send them in....talk about a storm in a teacup

ThisIsANickname · 10/05/2012 07:13

I am sorry, but where are they getting their information on what is healthy anyway? Maybe you should, in your child's school lunch, send a report which shows that lobbying parties have a huge say in what is considered "healthy" and that they are more concerned with their bottom line than with your child's health. Included in that report, you should show that the science on "healthy" is changing constantly, what you have decided is healthy for your DCs (including a fucking chocolate cake if you want to as an occassional treat) and why and you would appreciate them not try to police your parenting.

exoticfruits · 10/05/2012 07:16

It is all to do with healthy schools awards.
The problem is that those who think out these things don't take into account that DCs think differently - mine wanted something to eat quickly every day so they could get out to play and this ruled out a lot. I think that I would just say that it was going to be healthy but boring- it tended to be the same each day and they eat more imaginatively and with more variety at home.

sashh · 10/05/2012 07:33

Put two grapes in, or one grape and one raisin. Replacce the sandwith with a bread roll and seperate ham.

EmmaCate · 10/05/2012 07:35

Damn carb police. What the cocking hell is wrong with sandwiches? I had no idea this even happened. I make nice cake (y'know, with fruit in and everything) and would be well narked if it got 'sent home'.

YANBU... especially if they do serve up the kind of puddings I used to get at school.

catgirl1976 · 10/05/2012 07:38

Oooh DS isn't old enough for me to have experienced this yet but YANBU

The day they start this with me is the day DSs lunchbox will contain a Greggs Sauasage Roll, a Fruit Shoot and a note saying "Jog On"

Healthy eating is great but it sounds like they go waaaaay to far - your lunch box sounds fine.

exoticfruits · 10/05/2012 07:39

Mine are past the age but they generally had the same sandwich everyday and I would just explain that there is no way they were going to eat anything that needed a spoon or fork, it took them too long and they would leave it untouched.I make my own cakes.

littlemachine · 10/05/2012 09:27

I teach Foundation Stage, and have to spout this bollocks to the parents about packed lunches, under instruction of our head. I think it comes from the 'healthy schools' thingy. Don't see what's so good about having this award really

I have in the past raised all the points about the school dinners having cake twice a week, it's not our place to tell parents what to feed their children etc, but I'm told I have to say it. I don't 'police' the lunch boxes, as I'm generally setting up for the afternoon at lunchtime, or sometimes on the yard working on friendship issues or something more important. I think the dinner ladies sometimes send stuff home.

Having this policy doesn't stop some parents only sending in total rubbish (eg the Easter egg example up thread), so then sometimes I will make the child some cheese and crackers or a sandwich from our snack stuff. So that makes the 'policy' a waste of time all in all. I cringe every time I have to talk about it in induction meetings. I feel for you OP. Don't send in the extra fruit if you don't want to. What are they going to do - add a piece in? Hmm

ConferencePear · 10/05/2012 09:27

5foot5 I was so cross about this I was thinking about it in bed last night.
If a child has three meals a day that is twenty-one meals a week. School lunches can never be more than five so each child's lunch consumption is less than a quarter of his/her total intake. How can schools be qualified to make judgements on such a small sample ?

exexe · 10/05/2012 10:53

Stargirl The government is promoting healthy lunches but are not behind all the petty rules surely?
I totally back the healthy lunches drive. I used to get so annoyed when ds1 was at a private nursery and was getting chicken nuggets and chips for lunch. I think its terrible when children have crap in their lunch boxes.

At ds1's school the rules are no sweets, no chocolates and no fizzy drinks. I think thats fair enough.