Yesterday I had a new friend and her DS round for lunch and a play in the garden (was nice weather for all of half an hour 
)
I also invited another friend and her DS's round who I have known for a bit longer. I basically want to know if how I reacted yesterday was unreasonable or not and if it was how should I handle it in future.
My new friends DS was quite horrid to my DD2 and to my other friends DS's, snatching toys, pushing, throwing wooden bricks inside the house, he even ran into the dog with the toy pushchair.
I had to remove a toy off him that he had snatched off my DD, who was actively playing with it, and give it back to her as his mum wasn't able to get him to give it back. Was I U doing that? I felt terrible for taking it off him but also felt bad for DD as well.
When we came back in, he had a huge meltdown, screaming and shouting, biting & kicking his mum. I didn't know what to do so asked if she wanted any help in calming him down, she said no, but I was unsure if I should have stepped in and helped anyway. Once he had calmed down and I had made another cuppa I thought that maybe putting the TV on for the kids for a bit would help keep him calm. It didn't work.
He then ran the toy pushchair into my dog while she was laid in the corner of the room, at which point I told him off, I didn't shout, just used my stern voice and told him not to do that as it is not very nice. His mum said nothing. Was I U for telling him off for that? I had waited a few seconds after it happened thinking his mum would say something but she didn't.
Then he started chucking bricks around the room (wooden stacking ones) at which point I thought his mum might actually step in and tell him not to, she didn't, so I did and I confess I shouted 
I know I am U for shouting but TBH I was fed up pissed off by this point and told him not to do that. I then asked the kids to tidy the toys away, all of them helped baring my new friends DS.
So was I U to have told him off if his mum wasn't going to. Was I U for taking the toy off him that he had snatched of my DD (while she was playing with it)?
Another thing that kinda annoyed me was that his mum kept saying to him that if he doesn't do as he is told then StandingAlone will tell him off and smack him! I wouldn't have smacked him, I don't smack my DD's I certainly wont smack someone else's child. There are many other things he did that I didn't do anything about (neither did his mum).
I feel a bit horrid now that I told him off and I feel horrid for not helping my new friend when her DS was having a tantrum.
If you think I was U how do I deal with this in future as there are likely to be lots more times we get together with our DC's, and I really like my new friend she is funny, nice and kind.
Thanks for reading this far.