DH and I are having one on one classes with the midwife covering different aspects of the birth. This is because we are the only people pregnant at the moment so no one else needs to attend.
This week is about pain relief. I imagine they will cover epidural, water birth (which I want), breathing techniques (and how DH should help with that) and side effects of pethedine, epidural etc so we can make an informed decision and know what crosses the placenta etc.
DH is poorly. He has sore head and dodgy tummy this morning and the class is at 2pm. I hoped this morning he would feel better by 2pm but he has gone up to bed. I went to see him to find out if he thought he would get better or if was going to phone our midwife and reschedule. His (grumpy) answer is that he isn't going. I can go alone.
I don't want to go alone. I want to feel, for once, that he has some interest in this pregnancy (which we both planned) I want him to WANT to help me in labour. To know whatever thie breathing techniques are. To know the side effects of certain drugs so that when I'm off my rocker with pain he can make informed decisions about pethadine or whatever.
His attitude is that he will be useless at the birth, what can he do? Why does he even need to know these things? I feel unsupported, abandoned, and like he has resigned himself to being useless and almost like he isn't sure what use he would even be at the birth!
So I said to him "if it gets to 2pm" and you turn around and say you're not coming ut you haven't phoned midwife (he has the number in his phone) to reschedule I'll be so cross. He started shouting why didn't I reschedule if I cared? Surely though if HE thinks he is going to be too poorly with a dicky tummy to come, he should reschedule? Why is it all on me?
I'm 39 weeks, hormonal, tired and fat. I accept I may be being utterly unreasonable. I suspect this comes down to more about my feelings that he just doesn't care rather than the actual phoning or not phoning the midwife.