DH does not want me to take DS to a baby group. Is he being...

[Snusmumriken]

DH does not want me to take our 6 month old to a mother/baby group because several of the other babies that will be there are not vaccinated.

He read an article about whooping cough in the Guardian this morning and is worried DS will contract something.

Is he being unreasonable?

Thank you so much for the link HecateTrivia- I will read it asap.

I have been taking DS to groups, they have been a life saver. DH has a problem with this particular group only because several of the other mothers told me that their babies/toddlers were not vaccinated.

But is there evidence of this or is it scare mongering like the mmr jab caucus austism

I just read that Guardian article half an hour ago. Did you read it through OP? It didn't say that vaccinated babies could catch it. It says:

But it could also be because immunity from the vaccine wears off more quickly than doctors thought. A study from California of 15,000 children found that it seemed to wane after as little as three years.

It's nothing like that.

It's about vaccinated children losing immunity and therefore being effectively like unvaccinated children - able to contract and pass on whooping cough.

Or at least the link I read said that. But I may have missed something else.

Nothing like the mmr issue I mean.

Here is a link to the article he read:

www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/apr/22/who-needs-whooping-cough-jab?INTCMP=SRCH

Nonsense, I do understand about not vaccinating children.

My youngest dd caught ut at 2 weeks from an obviously in vaccinated child and was very ill even though i bf her. Very scary.

I belive unvaccinated children shouldn't be allowed to attend nursery or school tbh.

Your dh is being a bit Pfb, u need to mix with other mums anyway for your sanity so go...

He could get it from someone you walk past in the street. You can't live your life worrying about such things.

I know a girl who never let her child go near another child until she went to school. Same child has spent half her school life ill and off sick. She's permanently got something wrong with her.

If she'd been allowed to mix and mingle I doubt she'd ever be ill now.

Tell your oh he's being silly children are not fully vaccinated until their about 5 so unless he is planning not to send your child to school also

Very silly chikdren can't be fully vaccinated because their not due until diffrent ages shame for you child to miss out because you oh is being paranoid

He is being unreasonable. Babies need to socialise, they don't want plastic bubbles of isolation.

Thanks for all the responses. DH and I will have a think about it!

indeed. i take it this is your first born?

by the time you have two, you find the sight of your newborn with its siblings grubby hands all over it endearing, rather than a threat of imminent infection.

aside from that you can't hide inside forever! There is always 'something doing the rounds'.

Yes- we are first time parents. I am sure you can tell from a mile away, but I should point out that we are very social with DS.

DH is worried about a one of the many groups we go to because we know that several of the children that attend it are not vaccinated.

Thanks again for all your thoughts!

I am off to bed.

I don't think the other thread is saying that vaccinated children are passing it on. It is saying that there is a rise in cases, and that those who choose not to vaccinate cannot be blamed for this, as many cases are amongst the fully immunised.

A new formulation for the Pertussis part of DPT was introduced (in 2004, according to a poster on the other thread). As pointed out in the Guardian article, there are now questions about whether the protection from the current jab is actually good enough or perhaps wears off earlier than expected. however most children who have been immunised get the disease in mild form.

So the message is; be aware of the symptoms (good links in the other thread) and see your GP if you think you or DC have an unusual cough which has lasted over the typical 3 weeks they cite for miscellaneous viruses.

Tell your dh that he might be confusing whooping cough with whoopee cushions, and that getting whoopee cushions can be quite fun!

Sorry, that was probably a bit flippant. He is a bit precious and unreasonable.

I had whooping cough as a baby - no big deal apparently (according to my DM) - still here with no side effects.

(Not helpful at all, I know!!)

God, so much misinformation, half-baked ideas, and 'I think I read somewhere that...' nonsense comes up on threads like these...

Vaccines aren't fool proof and often don't work. Not sure what I'd do OP but your husband might have a point and certainly should be considered.

Vaccinated children can indeed pass the disease on, just because the vaccine is not transmittable doesn't mean that people who have the disease are not contagious. That isn't good logic.

In my county in 2010 2/3s of the people who contracted WC were vaccinated. Better stay away from all those people too.

Whooping cough can be a huge deal as a baby- my brother had it. Having said that I would go to groups.

I don't think that describing whooping cough as 'no big deal' helps anyone at all, and may encourage people not to vaccinate.

Your DS is vaccinated. Take him out.

My sister and I were not vaccinated since my dad was allergic to the vaccine, my parents did not want to take the risk. My sister was only a few months old when she got it, I was 3.

I have a friend whose DS got a viral infection at a couple of months old and had a short stay in hospital for it. It was never 'life threatening' but was poorly enough. She was convinced he caught it at playgroup (maybe/maybe not, just as likely at weigh clinic, Dr waiting room etc)

Anyway, when her dc2 was born she didn't take the baby out of the house for 4 months. The older child went to nursery, the grandmother did a lot of the work.

Most people don't have this option, for a lot of people, their 2nd/3rd/4th babies first trip out is the school run at a couple of days old with snotty nosed kids poking it. Somehow they survive.

I can understand the wanting to keep baby wrapped up in cotton wool, but in reality it is just impractical (and likrl to cause a lot of stress and anxiety)

OP

if its any consolation DP would NOT let me take DS1 on public transport until he was vaccinated, seriously he was v PFB. so for 12 weeks I walked everywhere!

ridiculous, but sourced from love

TBH, my DD was 4 months when I first went to a group at a church and she was ill after the first visit. She wasn't sitting up and I did regret taking her as they are much more vulnerable at the age. Lying flat with congested nose, projectile vomiting lying flat- not nice. I feel I could've avoided it a bit longer especially as I don't like baby groups! At 6 months though it is different if they're sitting up.

I don't agree that babies need other babies at 6 months. The mother's mental health is a different matter. Saying that I took both my DC to these groups and it made me feel even more stressed as you're trying to get to know people, sometimes with wailing baby, sometimes half concentrating on conversation as you are look out for your crawling baby. Toddler stage you're making sure they're not snatching etc.