To be pissed off that this child ....

[Bokkanikkaglory]

..... Keeps stealing eating my DD's school snack - literally grabbing it out of her hands and scoffing it in front of her?

Thinking it is funny.

This child is barely 7.

My DD is very upset about it - I've told her to tell the teachers next time it happens.

Should I approach other child's mother or speak to offending child myself?

I agree with seeker

I was approached on the playground by a very angry mum who insisted that my DD had been horrible to hers. I spoke to the teacher, to DD and to the parent of another pupil that phoned me up as she'd witnessed the other mother having a go at me, and it turned out it was her DD being unkind to mine and trying to bully her, rather than the other way round.

I would let the teachers deal with it; chances are this child has form for doing other sneaky unkind things so it won't come as a surprise to him/her

rip if you approached a child you would probably have her Mother to deal with in turn...why bother when that's the teachers job?

Please don't do anything stupid like a mustard sandwich! We're talking 7 year olds here- would you really do that to a 7 year old? Particularly when you've only got one si of the story? Who's the adult here?

Ooh yes graham or pop some chilli powder on a nice fresh bun....iced in hot pink of course.

seeker wont hurt a child...lesson learned! Taking someone's food isn't something a child would make up!

It's bullying, imo, and needs addressing. I would talk to the teachers, say you consider it to be bullying behaviour and that it needs to stop.

Oh FGS!

fgs what?

Snatching someone's food from them repeatedly and scoffing it in front of them is bullying behaviour.

Not saying the child made it up. But it could have only happened once. It could have been a joke that went too far. It could have been this child retaliating for something the op's child did. The offending child could have special needs.

Or the offending child could be a very nasty and unpleasant bully. And giving her a mustard sandwich is going to stop her bullying the op's child exactly how?

I'm sorry, that wasn't meant about you, Hecate. . Your comment is one I very much agree with.

Talk to the teacher, of course, but also teach your child to stand up for themselves? You say it keeps happening - didn't she tell the teacher? I'd worry that a child so unassertive could be a targent for further bullying.

ah, ok. The old cross-post disaster. Fair enough.

At least you know who is stealing it! Someone kept taking stuff out of DS's lunchbox last term until I left a note in there telling them to leave off. It's annoying that you go to the trouble of selecting nice healthy treats for your own child and they don't get to eat them. It does make you wonder why they do it though.

You need to speak to the teacher. I would be annoyed if my child's snack was getting stolen. But since it's happening on the school's watch, it's their responsibility to deal with. It would not be a good idea to approach the mother or the child imo.

Thanks everyone - the teacher it is then.

But seeker, surely the other child could only be on the receiving end of the mustard sandwich if she took it from OP's DD? Which negates the 'only happened once'. I'm not advocating this approach, but it has in its support that the bad thing can only happen as a direct consequence of the bad behaviour. Surely the natural way for us to learn (e.g. hot things burn = avoid next time)

Tempting as the mustard sandwich is, I would talk to the teacher.

But I wish someone had suggested the mustard sarnie when I was working with a surgeon who would eat other people's food - for example, the sandwiches put aside for Theatre staff who had worked without a break for most of the day, scrubbed up, assisting with major surgery. I'd have happily fed him a red chilli and mustard buttie - it might have taught him a lesson!

SDTG, we had one of thoes, a fridge raider. Strangly enough also a surgeon. . and only raided the nursing staffs fridge

He would be out of theater before the rest of us and could be quite blatant about it

Stole my dinner twice, would never admit it.

What he didn't know was that I didn't bring in what I would normally eat at home, that is as we were sharing a small office to eat in and a microwave I never brought in my normal very spicy food as I thought it would be rude to stink the place out.

Made some chapati and Daal with scotch bonnet chillis (alot less common back then). Got to a level where even OH commented it was a bit much but it was a slow burn so you would have been on the second bite before it hit you.

Wrapped it up, put my name and do not touch on it.

Sadly didn't get to see the actual event, just bumped in to him in the kitchen as he tried to set a record of getting milk down his throat, I just asked him mildly if something had disagreed with him?

All the nursing staff took to labeling their food with my name after that.

Sorry for Hijack OP

I vote go to the teacher first too

There was a child at my daughters school whose mother refused to give her child a bottle of water. The child ended up "taking" other childrens water bottles because she was thirsty.

Also when I was at primary school. There was a child that continously stole food from lunchboxes. I didn't know at the time, but it turns out the child was neglected and abused.

I would talk to the teacher really. I'm not saying it is the case, but there could be problems at home.

Arf @ SmellsLikeCatsPee Genius!

I'd go to the teacher.

SmellsLikeCatsPee My mum did something similar. My BIL was staying with us while him and my sister were doing up their flat before their wedding. My mum made him nice doorstep sandwiches but BIL kept complaining his were being pinched. My mum made him a doorstep sandwich which went in a pal's locker and BIL put one my mum had made specially with raw chilli's and black pepper. Outed the thief in minutes and the family still laugh about it.

Speak to the teacher.

You should tell the teacher.

Either the child is bullying or being deliberately hurtful to your DD (in which case the child needs to deal with it) , or genuinely underfed (in which case the teacher needs to know that appropriate steps can be taken to support the child).

dS has poor impulse control & might do rubbish like that. I would prefer you approach teacher who would then approach me if they felt it necessary.

Have a word with the teacher and ask her/him to keep an eye on it and let the lunch time staff know as well.