to always blow things up out of all proportion.

[iwantanoompaloompa]

I'm a worrier. Always have been.

Except I tend to take a legitimate worry, then inflate it past all rational outcomes to create the worst possible situation.

For example. I'm working on a project at the moment and had to ask another client if they would share some resources.

They will probably say no. However, overnight, as he hasn't got back to me, I've created a situation where they've said no, have been so offended ive even asked they've cancelled their contract and I've been fired.

I've barely slept a wink and can't think straight I've got myself into a pickle.

I do this ALL the time and it's starting to ruin my life a little - I've lost count of the days I've wasted inventing crises which never happened.

oh no! you've been fired?? i'm so sorry. sounds like there are some major underlying issues here. have you ever spoke with a GP about this? or anyone? does it rule your every day life?

No no. Sorry, that came out wrong.

I haven't been fired. None of that has happened, I've just invented the taking offence and firing overnight!

DH's entire family are like this. You need to fix it. In DH's family, those who have tried to deal with it say they are so much happier as a result. In all cases, professional help is needed. One sister is on anti-anxiety medication which helps a lot. Another has had counselling and therapy which also helps. It is not healthy to live like this and I really feel for you. Please go and get help. Just telling yourself to stop is unfortunately, unlikely to be enough.

You sound just like me. Sorry I can't say anything to help, but I do know how you feel.

I have conversations in my head about how I think things will go (badly). I'm usually completely wrong though :)

Oh, one thing I try to do when things keep going round my head in the middle of the night is visualise myself putting the "problem" into a Click-Lock box, and putting the lid on. I often have to visualise myself doing this quite a few times before I relax.
I read about this somewhere and basically what you're doing is putting the problem "somewhere safe" until you are ready to deal with it.

It's not a long term fix but can help in the short term.

It sounds a bit like obsessive thought, which is part of the OCD area of problems. I have the same problem when I get particularly stressed. I just can't turn my head off.

There are a few things that I've found that work.

1. If I am lying in bed, I get up and do something mundane, like Ironing.
2. I don't drink anything caffinated after 5pm. I find that caffine makes the problem worse.
3. I have a game on my phone, that takes a lot of concentration - by putting my mind on that it helps break the cycle of thought.

Lastly, I went to the doctor who prescribed Propanolol for if its gets really bad. It helps by reduding anxiety and that helps stop the repetitive thought.

I do this too. Lots of Rescue Remedy for me. I also try and tell my partner about whatever the worry is, as it never seems so bad once I have told him.

I've been like this since I was a child. I can remember writing something down that was worrying me a flushing it down the loo to try and get rid of it. I must have been 9-10 at the time.

On the plus side, nothing ever turns out as I have imagined it will in my head.

But I wish I knew how to stop this.

I just wrote a big, long reply here which failed to post!

Anyway OP, I would suggest a chat with your GP. Ask about the possibility of being referred for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. I really think it might be helpful for you as it worked wonders for me in helping me control thinking errors like the ones you are describing.

I was also prescribed propanalol for anxiety but didn't find it terribly helpful as it only really affects the physiological symptoms of anxiety...so my mind was still in overdrive! Thats not to say it wouldn't be useful for others, but just not for me.

Hope you get something sorted out soon, it can be absolutely horrible.

My mother is like this and it is really draining for the people around her.

I think she is basically a happy person but in my opinion she has given herself depression several times through escalating normal concerns into enormous problems.
She does this in conversation. We will touch on a subject that she may find worrying and within 10 minutes the end of the world has began and she is in a state of distress.

For example she needs a dental check up. The day before the appointment she decides that the dentist will diagnose advanced gum disease, she will need ALL her teeth removed and need a complete set of dentures. This will affect her appearance. Her whole face will cave in, people will laugh in the street and she will never meet another man. This in turn will cost so much money that she will be bankrupted and will basically be living on the street with a sunken face. Her grandchildren will walk passed her in the street and pretend they don't know her. This is not a joke, she will nearly be crying at this stage.

Sorry that's not helpful but I think lots of people do this. Would CBT help? I bet it would. Once you start derailing in to anxiety you could learn strategies to stop?

BTW - she did not need any dental treatment

Glad on not alone.

The comment about OCD is interesting as I do have a bit of a locking the front door thing. Often have to check and sometimes have been known to go back to the house.

I've been prescribed propanol in the past (short term) for anxiety and have had counselling for other things but never CBT. Maybe that would help.

It tends to be worse when things are going well. Like something is going to come along and ruin it.

Have you ever noticed how nothing ever turns out exactly as you imagined? So if you visualise a situation, the one thing you can guarantee is won't be quite like that?

I recognised this as a child in connection with experiences I was a bit anxious about; it was never that bad, at least in that way. I turned that around, so for example, always visualise planes crashing, as a sort of insurance, as, it then coulndn't happen, like that anyway - you can understand this as probability rather than superstition.

I can see though that whereas for me this is about understanding that things are never as you imagine, almost always better and, if bad, it is better to be there and deal with it, your reaction might be to obsess the other way and think you have to visualise every variation on a bad scenario, in which case sorry I mentioned it!

This is called 'catastrophising'; your thoughts become irrational and you imagine the worst things that could possibly happen. I think CBT could help you; it is all about breaking the thought patterns that you are having so that you do not automatically go into catastrophising mode.

I'm exactly the same and ended up having a panic attack which I thought was a heart attack and ended up in a+e . I've since had cbt and now I can recognise the signs and have learned how to look at a situation and rationalise it. Do go to your GP because you'll work yourself up even more if you leave it.

Also, can you just accept that everyone, including you, sometimes makes mistakes and that everyone else understands this? So if you do the right thing at work most of the time then a rare mistake will be accepted and accommodated, not result in you being fired.

I think if you are able to accept that you are ordinarily fallible and give yourself the freedom to fail or mess up occasionally, that could remove the stress of worrying about it in anticipation.

I have friend a bit like you, who thinks carefully about decisions, acts on them, then worries obsessively about whether they were right. She knows perfectly well that she has thought it through, has reasonable judgement and has the skills to rectify any problem, so i find this worry pointless. My approach would be trust your judgement, once the decision is made it is made, put it aside and recognise there's nothing further you can do until the next stage. Then, if, though unlikely, you did mess up, you then have to deal with it. That's ok. It happens.

CBT is great for this, and yes, voicing the problem (to a sympathetic person) can be great. I am a mostly recovered anxious person - when I start worrying I can now stop myself :)

Ha! I had to actively teach myself NOT to do that iwant.

Beleive me I can conjure the end of the world from losing my watch.

I used to rationalise the problem in my head, take a few deep breaths and then deliberately think about something else. I would visualise a big fence around the 'problem' and a sign that says 'Deal with this TOMORROW'. It did work. Just maturing and becoming more confident in general helped.

Having said that when I get a bout of depression it comes back really badly. Like a swarm of nasty stinging bees.