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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to ask for some money back

27 replies

thatisall · 20/04/2012 13:05

This should maybe be in the money section but i only really read and comment in AIBU so here goes.
I got married last week and hired two vintage cars, one for myself and Dad and another to drive my now dh and his groomsmen to the church, before coming to get my bridesmaids.

Upon entering the church grounds with my dh, the car got caught on a speed bump of some sort and was damaged, spilling oil all over the grounds.

My dh told him to stop as he was spilling oil everywhere but the driver wouldn't listen and drove right up to the Church door before circling back round and coming to a halt.

This meant that there was oil EVERYWHERE and that guests and later my bridesmaids and I would have to walk through it just to get to the Church.

My car then had to do two trips, collecting the bridesmaids and then coming back for my Dad and I. The changes meant that I was 40 mins late for the ceremony and so 40 min late for the reception and everything that followed.

My dress was covered in oil as I walked down the aisle despite our best efforts. My shoes are ruined as are the bridesmaids little ballet pump stye shoes and the groomsman's suits which were purchased and not hired, have oil on them. None of the guests have raised issues about their shoes and outfits but i suspect that's just good manners.

When we kept the church as husband nd wife, the car company were there with a huge pick-up truck collecting the car. We and our guests had to wait for them to move it. At the time I laughed about this and dh and guests, took their cue from me and laughed too, but I think that was terrible.

It cost 500 for both cars as we were given a discount of 40 because the owner knows my friend.

This same friend thinks we should not ask for any money as they had already given us a discount.

My best man thinks we should ask for it all back as it will cost more than 500 to replace all the shoes and have the suits (which unlike my dress could have been worn again) cleaned, and not to mention my dress and the inconvenience.

My dh thinks we should send them the bill for all cleaning, and replacement but not inconvenience as the cleaning etc will probably be more than 500.

Part of me just wants to bury my head about it as I hate this sort of thing :-S

What do you think? and how do we go about this without upsetting friend. We won't have the need to hire from them again, but I don't want to cause a rift between them and my friend.

OP posts:

Lac365 · 20/04/2012 13:08

You just got married. Be happy.

Sometimes shit just happens. It's not the end of the world.

Go forth, multiply and have a great life together!

HexagonalQueenOfTheSummer · 20/04/2012 13:08

Surely the car firm have insurance for this kind of thing? I don't think I'd just let it go tbh and would try to get a partial refund of some sort.

Original poster

thatisall · 20/04/2012 13:11

Lac365 know what you're saying but 500 is ALOT of money as will be the cost of sorting these suits etc. Plus because everyone keeps asking about it....its kinda hard to just let it go :-S

OP posts:

ChaosTrulyReigns · 20/04/2012 13:13

If he had have stopped as your dad advised you would have still been late wouldn't you?

And why on earth did you walk through the oil in potentially the most expensive dress you will ever wear?

That said, congratulations on your marriage.

Oh and you are allowed to venture out of AIBU you know, you won't get lynched.

ArtVandelay · 20/04/2012 13:14

An accident can happen, but it was silly of the driver to not stop the car and prevent the oil spill from happening. I do think that the company are to blame in that respect. In your position I would send them a bill. As for your friend - well, they should keep out of it IMO. I also would be claiming only for cleaning/replacements, not for the poor service/inconvinience as thats harder to define.

I'd probably threaten them with small claims - its not like they are a normal taxi firm or a bus company. A wedding is a specific event which requires specific treatment and behaviour. So YANBU.

ArtVandelay · 20/04/2012 13:16

Chaos - good point. How much oil was there? Like a flood?

diddl · 20/04/2012 13:18

I don´t think that you should have to pay for the second car at all tbh.

But I´m confused as to why you had to walk through oil to get to the church when you were married & that you had oil on your dress to walk down the aisle?

MrsShitty · 20/04/2012 13:19

I don't understand why people walked right through the oil either! Not nit picking OP but surely people could have walked around it? One of the groomsmen could have stood and warned people.

Original poster

thatisall · 20/04/2012 13:24

The oil went right up to the door as the driver of the first car insisted that he HAD to drop the men there. It sort of ran down the grounds aswell and because he circled round, made a right mess, probably 4m across that you had to pass to get to the Church door. It wasn't deep, obviously, and I was holding up my dress as best I could as did the men with their trouser legs, but somehow there they were 3 big splurges on a beautiful silk dress and a pair of 100 pound shoes ruined.

OP posts:

diddl · 20/04/2012 13:30

Sorry I misread the op- I thought that you & your husband arrived together & confused myself

Sounds as if your driver was just as bad tbh-I would have refused to get out!

Is it unusual for a car to be able to get right up to the door?

Original poster

thatisall · 20/04/2012 13:33

Its the way this church is situated. Theres a separate car park and then a sweeping driveway that's usually locked but of course was open for the wedding cars. I think the drivers were worried about the weather as it was raining???? Stupid! We'd much rather have been wet than oily.

Refusing to get out while I was already 40mins late for my wedding with dh waiting inside....never crossed my mind. I just wanted to get to him.

OP posts:

ArtVandelay · 20/04/2012 13:34

They pretty much got everything wrong that they could have, really... You probably would have been safer in a mini-cab :( I'd push for the money, send copies of the receipts - be really thorough and keep at them.

As for your friend thats the intermediery - it sounds like you risk other friendships if you aren't seen to be acting and if she can't see your point of view, can you really say she's a good friend? If I was that person, I'd be at least "I'm staying well out of this" and not comment to either party.

HexagonalQueenOfTheSummer · 20/04/2012 13:38

Ditto what ArtVandelay said.

Why should you keep schtum about this just to keep your friend happy?

Flowe · 20/04/2012 13:46

We had a problem with a wedding car breakdown and the company repaid the whole amount without us even asking. That's despite them going to a huge amount of extra trouble to minimise the impact on the day (they delivered the vintage one on a breakdown truck so we could have pics taken)
We would and have recommended them to others.
Deal direct with car company and get a full refund
walking in the oil seems a little silly though so don't hold your breath on compensation for that.

Original poster

thatisall · 20/04/2012 13:55

I must sound mad for walking on it!! lol.

Honestly MNers because the car circled round whilst spilling oil....I HAD to walk through it to get to the Church door....there was no other way. Even if I'd gone through a side door, I would still have had to walk through it. You couldn't go around it. There were at least 4m of oil between me and the door and it had spread sideways up to the Church ground walls.

Really, i mean it, we weren't just being stupid. lol

OP posts:

ArtVandelay · 20/04/2012 14:00

Wasn't the Vicar furious? At the church where I grew up, there was such a list of things you could and couldn't do - confetti, rice etc. Our Vicar would have had the driver by the throat against a gravestone for an oil spill in his churchyard. What if there were people getting married afterwards? The more you write, the more I think that this firm are very rubbish indeed.

PandaWatch · 20/04/2012 14:04

Anyone providing services for weddings has massively inflated prices, because they take advantage of the fact that you want it to be the most perfect day. It all sounds like a right fuck up and I think at the very least they should refund you the full amount you paid.

I hope it doesn't in anyway sour the memories of your wedding day though OP. I don't think I've ever been to a wedding (ours included!) where everything has run completely smoothly!

And congratulations!

Original poster

thatisall · 20/04/2012 14:07

Thanks guys...it didn't ruin the wedding...thanks in no small part to our wedding party and the fab photographer who encouraged us to see the funny side and even took photos of dh and I on the pick up truck.

ArtVandelay...this was a 'petals only' confetti situation and yes the priest hit the roof!! He was shovelling sawdust on it all as we were leaving with a face like thunder. :-S

OP posts:

Tabliope · 20/04/2012 14:09

Sorry but I'm finding this really hard to visualise - so there was 4m of oil for you to walk through that had also spread up the sides of the church walls? How? Was it spraying out? Usually if there is an oil leak isn't it just a trail of oil about a couple of inches wide? Something you can lift your dress up and walk over? I can't quite understand the 4m of oil (presuming that you mean 4 metres) as I've never known a car to do it. Couldn't you just walk round the car to the other side? Any photos to make it clearer?

ArtVandelay · 20/04/2012 14:13

Okay - then maybe the Priest can also back you up with an email or a letter. This firm is a joke.

Original poster

thatisall · 20/04/2012 14:19

Tabilope. I wasn't there when it all came out as it was carrying the groomsmen, I don't think it came out as a spray, my dh describes it as pouring out and the grounds have a slight incline and maybe the rain made it spread. Dh says the driver did a full circle of the grounds before he decided to stop the car. why? i don't know.
I don't know how it got that bad, it was shocking.

It wasn't so much the volume as how much of an area it covered.

I know it's hard to visualise and although I have pics, I haven't got any of the floor lol.

OP posts:

diddl · 20/04/2012 14:57

I think that you shouldn´t have to pay the car firm anything & they should pay for any cleaning of suits that you have done tbh.

Let´s face it-the first driver didn´t listen to your husband-nothing was done to clean/absorb any of the oil before you got there, you were a car down...!

Original poster

thatisall · 20/04/2012 15:04

paid in advance guys :=S

OP posts:

LaurieFairyCake · 20/04/2012 15:09

I think you should contact a specialist dry cleaner for your dress and the suits, they may also try to clean your shoes. Then I would send the car company a copy of the invoice for payment.

If they didn't pay I would just claim in the small claims court online.

for me it's not about not paying for the car but instead restitution for the damages.

diddl · 20/04/2012 15:11

I think that you should get a full refund.

Have the firm contacted you at all with apologies/offers of a partial/full refund at all?

If not they should be named and shamed on herehang their heads in shame.

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