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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this was totally and utterly ridiculous.

36 replies

hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:14

take DD swimming to the local pool. It has male and female changing areas.

The utter faff that some poor woman had to go through to get her big teenaged son with learning difficulties changed was ridiculous.

She had to :

Get out of the pool.

Get him out of the pool.

Both in cozzies dripping wet.

Walk all the way through the female changing (where the only ones getting changed).

All the way out to the desk.

Get the receptionist to call an attendant.

Walk back to changing room.

Wait for attendant.

Who then got the key for the disabled changing room.

The the mum and her son had to walk all the way back through the female changing and round the corner to the disabled changing.

I got talking to her as she waited for the attendant and because he was over 8 there had been complaints and she'd been told not to change him in the female changing.

OP posts:
Debsbear · 18/04/2012 15:16

YANBU!

hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:17

Damn.

"where the only ones getting changed were me and DD and I wouldn't have had a problem with it and I would have made DD just deal with it if she'd said a word"

Blush
OP posts:
TeacupTempest · 18/04/2012 15:17

Well I can see the point of not having a teenage boy getting changes in the female changing room. Does seem a right faff though. Why weren't the disabled changing rooms open?

nickelhasababy · 18/04/2012 15:18

YANBU.

Do they really not have family changing at your pool?

that's shockingly bad customer service :( Angry

hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:18

They keep them locked apparently because they don't have lockers so there's nowhere to store stuff safely.

OP posts:
hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:19

Family changing rooms are only in the ladies changing and there are only 2.

OP posts:
nickelhasababy · 18/04/2012 15:19

Teacup - it's to stop non-disabled people using them as family rooms, i guess

hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:19

There are cubicles in the changing but they are tiny and the woman said she couldn't manage to change her son in them.

OP posts:
VickityBoo · 18/04/2012 15:20

I admire her for still taking him swimming with that messing about. Our pools have family changing rooms for mums, dads, mixed sex children. I just assumed they all would.

nickelhasababy · 18/04/2012 15:20

sorry x-posts.

that's just wrong.

in our pool, the "group" changing is separate from ladies' and men's changing areas.
so anyone can use them. they're a good size, too, and the lockers are in a central area, on the way to/from the showers.

stealthsquiggle · 18/04/2012 15:21

Isn't there a pool attendant, or someone, who could call reception from the pool and ask them to open the disabled changing room Confused?

hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:22

I don't know - I didn't ask her - there are lifeguards but they are up on the big high chairs.

I suppose maybe that would compromise safety in the pool, if they left to get an attendant?

OP posts:
nickelhasababy · 18/04/2012 15:22

good idea, stealth.

you need to write in to complain and request that they review their quite-frankly outdated changing rooms.

WilsonFrickett · 18/04/2012 15:22

They really need a better system and in terms of their disability access it's not on. If the female changing rooms were busier other people may have felt uncomfortable.

Why can't they have a system where person who needs disabled changing arrives and says 'we will be swimming for approx x minutes' and someone goes and unlocks the changing room at that time? Or why can't they give their disabled users a key on a wrist band? It's not very dignified for everyone the way that it is.

Can you suggest some changes? it's not good practice to lock disabled facilities

fluffiphlox · 18/04/2012 15:23

It's a shame that the lifeguard couldn't hold the key. Seems mad to make them go to reception.
I can see why people may have complained. I have had not so small boys gawping at me in communal changing rooms. (Not talking about kids with LD). I'm sure these Mummies wouldn't want similarly aged girls go into male communal changing rooms with their Dads. Sorry wandered off-piste then.

Would agree the pool wants to find a better solution for this lady and her son.

hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:23

I honestly hadn't thought of it as an issue until I met that lady that day Blush

It's terrible isn't it?

OP posts:
nickelhasababy · 18/04/2012 15:23

yes, a key on a wristband would work - like the lockers are.
the key lives in the door, then if you need that room, you take the key band.

hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:24

It just seemed like such a total and utter palaver that didn't need to be.

OP posts:
hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:25

It's quite an old leisure centre though - not that that's an excuse.

OP posts:
supernannyisace · 18/04/2012 15:28

Not quite the same scenario but when my DS was 10 I wanted to buy him a new suit for my wedding.

Went to BHS -I obviously wanted to help him change into it - and see how it all fitted. I knew we couldn't go inthe mens - but when I asked to take him into the women's fitting room the assistant made a real fuss.

she said that she would have to close the fitting rooms in case any other women complained ? It is all individual curtained off areas - no one would be seen? In the end I took him in anyway as wanted to buy him the suit. I wouldn't have minded but it was empty - it was a really quiet time - like 3pm on a monday aftern oon or something.

Crazy rules.

Your lady should write to the pool man agement and see if they are aware of how difficult it is making it for them to swim.

TheEternalOptimist · 18/04/2012 15:46

That is ridiculous.

The woman and her son must have been cold with all that wandering about getting keys. The leisure centre really should make provisions for people with SN and their carers.

hathorkicksass · 18/04/2012 15:49
Grin

I think I have a unanimous YANBU

OP posts:
DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 18/04/2012 15:51

I can see why some people wouldn't be happy about a teenage boy in the ladies changing room, SN or not, but that sounds a right faff for this lady and her son, as well as others, particularly those with physical disabilities.

There must be a better way to do things. Extra keys, one at repection desk, others near the pool with the lifeguards for example?

TheEternalOptimist · 18/04/2012 15:54

Desperately
Are most leisure centres not individual cubicles anyway though? It is not as if women are wandering about in the nude. It has been a while since I was in a UK pool, in Germany they only had unisex changing rooms.

Kladdkaka · 18/04/2012 15:57

It's a common problem for people with disabilities. They make adjustments in one area and create other problems in the process. Try flying with free disabled assistance and you'll see what I mean.