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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Baby in pram with bottle in his mouth?

72 replies

mythical · 16/04/2012 01:08

That's it really, he was in his (carrycot) pram with a bottle in his mouth. He couldn't have been older than 3-4 months. His mum was looking at someone's stuff ( we were at a car boot sale)
Bottle was just sort of balanced... In his mouth.
Wibu to do a double take? Or am I completely out of the loop and it's a perfectly normal thing to do?

OP posts:

BertieBotts · 16/04/2012 08:27

Um, it's a choking risk.

But is fairly common - I see it a few times a week. Am surprised it's not one of the things HVs are instructed to warn you about direly.

I don't like it at all, you should hold your baby while feeding them, however you do it. They don't need your full attention, but they do need touch and someone to notice (immediately) if they have had enough/have finished/are not wanting the milk/a bit is going down the wrong way.

BertieBotts · 16/04/2012 08:28

Babies can still hold their own bottles while in your lap, or being watched.

Twins are a bit different, but still, I wouldn't want to leave them because of the choking thing.

Original poster

mythical · 16/04/2012 08:34

Eh, I wish people would read subsequent posts too, I'm not getting my knickers in a twist about anything, I was just curious because the baby was so little and I've never seen it before with such a small baby :)

OP posts:

AwkwardMaryHadAnEasterLamb · 16/04/2012 08:36

Diddl but not for EVERY feed surely?

Original poster

mythical · 16/04/2012 08:36

He wasn't holding anything, his hands and rest of his body were all wrapped up, only head poking out.

OP posts:

kirsty75005 · 16/04/2012 08:43

@Billy. But doesn't the child actually have to be sucking on a newborn bottle for anything to come out ? At least that was the impression I got with mine - the teat was quite stiff and wouldn't let anything pass if it was just held upside down.

Is my bottle unusual in that respect ? And if not, what is the choking risk ?

fishybits · 16/04/2012 08:54

DD at 12 weeks can hold the bottle herself but only in my arms as that's where tend to I feed her. I did prop feed her in her car seat last week for about a minute as she was having a feed me meltdown and both dogs had rolled in something unspeakable and were trying to jump into the car. Perhaps a MNer hoiked her judgy pants and made a cats bum face at me but I missed it.

BillyBollyBandy · 16/04/2012 09:09

link here kirsty

I am amazed at all these tinies holding a bottle! I'm not sure if my dd's are lazy or physically weak, but they have both been on the 91st percentile from birth and while dd2 has the strength to hold the bottle, she drops it. Can use a beaker though.

Mrsjay · 16/04/2012 09:12

Didnt you call SS

Im sure the mum knew what she was doing I never prop fed mine but I dont see it as a major form of neglect ,

Original poster

mythical · 16/04/2012 09:13

If the little one was holding it or wasn't lying completely flat I don't think I would even notice it, I just remember thinking "that can't be comfy"
Maybe I just don't know how babies work!

OP posts:

kirsty75005 · 16/04/2012 09:16

@Billy. Thanks for that. Do you know whether there have been cases of babies actually dying this way, and if so, how often? (I've seen a lot of things that we're told are dangerous where after further checking the risk turns out to be theoretical or only applies in certain circumstances...)

BillyBollyBandy · 16/04/2012 09:20

I am not a leading expert in this field Kirsty Have a look on google like I did

It just isn't something I would do, not bothered what other people do particularly

Original poster

mythical · 16/04/2012 09:21

And I never said it was a major form of neglect, I've just never heard of it before (as I've already mentioned) and was just wondering if it's something completely normal to do, and it seems so! I never expressed an opinion on it ( you would see that if you read any of my posts)

OP posts:

CamperWidow · 16/04/2012 09:25

I do it. I have 6 month DD who looks 4months and a very active 2.7 yr old. If we are out and about I will have to push the buggy, hold DD1s' hand and feed DD2, so I sometimes prop here bottle on her blankets. She is starting to hold it now though. It could have been me you saw yesterday at a car boot sale. If it was I'm glad you didn't say anything.

Get over it.

pigletmania · 16/04/2012 09:27

Oh dear I have done that once whilst trying to settle ds in his Moses basket. I propped the bottle up on a small toy so he would get used to self settling. Oh the bottle had my BM in it, is tat ok

pigletmania · 16/04/2012 09:28

I was always there looking into Moses basket, would never leave ds like that

lemmein · 16/04/2012 09:34

I used to occasionally do this with my youngest. I had two DDs under 18 month -with the best will in the world it wasnt always possible to sit for half hour feeding. I never left the room though when propping just incase, but often sat alongside her feeding getting her DSis ready. I don't think its a big deal really as long as they're supervised. I didnt do it every feed either.

diddl · 16/04/2012 09:36

"Diddl but not for EVERY feed surely?"

Well yes as I bfed.

I can´t think that it would have been different if I hadn´t.

OK, so this mum was out & about-but if I was I had to find somewhere to sit & feed.

Can´t imagine not bothering to do that.

Whatmeworry · 16/04/2012 09:39

Did the bottle have coke in it?

You're over-worrying OP.....

CamperWidow · 16/04/2012 14:52

Diddl It's not about being bothered. It sometimes isn't practical. I was outdoors, it was cold, I had a toddler, there was no-where to sit. It doesn't mean I don't love my DD2 any less and I object to your inference that it makes me a lazy unloving parent because there were no seats.

diddl · 16/04/2012 15:01

Well as I bfed-I had to find somewhere to sit down as I never mastered it standing.

At a car boot I would have sat on the ground.

Just seems odd to me to not sit & feed your baby-but that´s just my opinion based on my experience.

I wouldn´t for a moment think that someone who didn´t do the same as me wasn´t a good parent or didn´t love their child.

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 16/04/2012 15:16

YANBU - It's a choking hazard and if she was distracted she might not notice at all.

MrsTerryPratchett · 16/04/2012 15:33

I have asked around about this because I work with young, vulnerable mothers as part of my job and, yes, it is dangerous and not advised. As well as this, on every BF versus FF thread when bonding is brought up, the FFing mothers always say that they hold and look at their DCs while FFing. All fine and dandy and I couldn't give a shit whether people FF or BF but if they are prop feeding, there is not the same cuddling involved in feeding. If they can hold their own bottle, I can't imagine it is as dangerous.

notso · 16/04/2012 15:49

Was in town once with DH there was a baby in a carseat on a pram outside a phonebox with a bottle propped on blankets, he was purple in the face and spluttering.
DH moved the bottle and knocked on the window to the woman in the phonebox saying your "baby is choking", she flew out the door and told him to "fuck off and mind your own business".

kitcatcandy · 16/04/2012 16:00

It's only safe if you use gaffer tape and put fanta in the bottle

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