to be annoyed with nursery...and how do I politely-but-firmly get it sorted?

[lurcherlover]

DS is 18mo and goes to nursery 2 days a week. He has sensitive skin and is v prone to nappy rash so I have written many times in his communication book that during nappy changes they need to use cotton wool and water, not baby wipes (which irritate his skin) and to apply nappy cream (if we don't use it he gets sore quickly). Nappies and wipes are provided by nursery, but I always send him with plenty of cotton wool in his bag, and have left them a big tub of sudocrem. I am fed up though of these instructions being ignored - when I write it in his book, on that day he will come home with cream on his bum, but it seems it's never logged centrally as being a need so the next time he won't. On Friday he came home with his bottom red raw (wasn't like that when I dropped him off in the morning), no cream on it, and he has been so sore this weekend that he has screamed in pain every time I've changed his nappy. I don't think they leave him sitting around in poo or anything like that - they log in his book when he has his nappy changed and it's always at least 3 times a day - I think they just use wipes on him and no cream. So IANBU to be annoyed, am I? It's surely not precious to expect them to use cotton wool and water instead of wipes when I provide it myself, and to stick a bit of cream on afterwards?

Next question - how do I get across to them that I am sick of this being ignored? I have written it half a dozen times in his book. I really like the staff and don't want to cause a rift with them but I need them to start following my instructions. I'm thinking of writing a letter explaining clearly what needs to happen when they change his nappy, pointing out that I have asked repeatedly for this to be done and it hasn't been, and asking that all staff are informed and that it is entered on ds' nursery file if necessary. Is this OK or too heavy-handed?

Have a chat with the room supervisor first and ask her to ensure that it's done. If no joy, then a letter to the manager will sort it. It should be on his file anyway.

I would try the letter approach.

Your poor DS, he must be very uncomfortable.

If you can't solve it with them, I'd be looking for a different childcare provider for him.

they need to follow your instruction on this, it is leaving a child uncomfortable and sore.

perhaps get them to put a notice in the changing room X needs cream to be applied every nappy change.

Yes ask again but tbh I can see how this might be an issue with nursery if they have different staff who don't know.

Also have you tried using weleda calendula changing cream- miles better than Sudocrem at soothing red raw type /sensitive skin nappy rash.

I'd change to a childminder or different nursery
Sounds awful

Are the staff not very approachable? It just seems odd that you have written it down but not actually spoken face to face with anyone about it.
I would start by speaking to his key person first and making sure that she knows about your request. It is a perfectly reasonable request to make and they should be following your requests.
Ask about their nappy changing policy- some nurseries operate so that the child's key person does their nappies. Some nurseries have a rota system so that one person does it in the morning, someone else in the afternoon etc, depending on which shift they are on. Some nurseries (mine included) record each nappy change, along with who changed it on a sheet that is kept and the daily sheets/books are filled in from this.
It might be that the person who reads and fills in the book is not the same as the person who changes the nappies.
If, after you have spoken to them, it still happens then I would consider writing a letter of complaint to the manager.

Sorry, should have said - I have told them about it verbally too, just write it in his book in case a different staff member doesn't know. I know they have a rota system for nappies so it will be a different person who changes him from one time to the next. I really don't want to change nursery as this is my only gripe with them - in every other way they have been really flexible (happy to do BLW, really trying to fit in with ds' nap routine rather than making him conform to theirs etc) and ds loves going. They have an Oustanding rating and are really good in terms of staff-children ratios and so on. If they can get this sorted I will have no complaints at all, but it is getting me down I must admit.

Gigondas - I have the weleda cream, which is fine on a day to day basis when he's not sore - but I find as soon as he has any soreness sudocrem or metanium are the only things that are any good. He's needed steroid cream from the dr before now as it's been so bad

Poor boy. And lurched put post better than I did (they should be doing what you ask but I wondered If message doesn't always get through).

I had this problem with DD1 - I spoke to staff several times, left notes etc. As others have advised speak to key worker & whoever is in charge of the room - ask them what information they need in writing to ensure that your dc is being properly cared for & do not hesitate to go over their heads if they do not comply.

I ended up writing to the owners threatening ofsted & early years team but it got my point across!

This is ridiculous. Go in and tell them that unless they follow this request you will make a compain and remove your son from their nursery. I'm a nursery nurse and I wouldn't dream of doing this. All our children have little specific things that parents have requested and although the odd thing may slip through on occasion it doesn't happen very often. No good enough.

definitely speak to them and ask what they suggest re: communication issues.
They are causing harm to your lo.
Coul you pin a notice onto his clothes to the effect 'please use cottonwool and sudocream as my bottom gets really sore with wipes ' and see how that goes.

*complaint

Could you try sending him in with some washable cotton wipes instead of cotton wool? They might be more willing to use them then?

We use these as ds has sensitive skin too but cotton wool was the biggest pain in the arse ever (no pun intended ) especially when cleaning up poos! Cotton wipes are so much easier.

Maybe also ask for it to be logged who, by name, changes him, at what time, and for that to be given to you in writing when you pick him up each day, so that you can 'work out if there's a pattern and then give useful advice to whoever is needing it'

Being identifiable, and accountable, can do wonders for people's conscientiousness, I reckon.

it sounds horrible for your DS - why can the nursery not grasp that he needs no wipes and lots of cream?!

The nursery my DS goes to (also Outstanding) has a chart next to the nappy change area, which requirements for each child written on it - so 'no Sudocrem' for some kids, 'only use own cream' on others - and on the nappy shelf, each child has a pile of nappies and, where apt, cream too. So not sure why your nursery can't have similar?

I would assume they could cope with a child with allergies, or specific dietary requirements, and if so, they can cope with this issue too. If not, it is not an outstanding nursery, IMO.

print out, in large letters something like 'johnny needs nappy cream at every nappy change + do not use wipes'
2 copies, laminate them and put one up above the changing area and one in his room.
we had the same prob when dc2 was little, very prone to nappy rash...

Print them out a sheet to stick up in the nappy change area detailing what you want with your son's name in big letters and put a little sticker on your DS's top saying "Please use cotton wool, water and sudocrem when changing my nappy." That'll get the message across.

p.s. I took in large cotton pads and weleda lotion for cleaning and weleda nappy cream for red bum, metanium for raw bum.

No advice for the nursery dilemma but wondered whether you had tried organic nappies? My niece has terrible problems with nappy rash, really sore and painful on a daily basis until someone suggested to her mum to try organics; shes never had a problem since. You can buy them in Sainsburys apparently.

I would talk to manager and ask for a sign to be put up in changing area with ds photos and clear instructions on what he needs. We had that in my work with kids with allergies

in the nursery where my ds went, they have an A4 sheet up above the changing table with each child's name and next to it they have a note whether there are any instructions for changing the baby's nappy. some spaces are left blank because they ont need special creams or cotton wool and water etc but those that do have it beside their name and each time the nappy is changed the staff member checks the list to see what to use.

could you suggest something similar for your Ds's nursery?

Some babies are very prone to nappy rash, even if they are washed with cotton wool and water. One thing springs to mind is whether the nursery are taking care to pat dry your little one with a towel after each change.

Cotton wool is revolting to use. Prehaps a compromise would be to provide washable wipes. You would get the washable wipes back and then you would KNOW that they were using them. (Ie. some of washable wipes will be covered in sh!t or smell a bit of wee) You can make washable wipes cheaply out of an old bit of fleece. Do you provide the nursey with a towel. I found that terry nappies made a great small towel for nursery.

If your baby is suffering hellishly from nappy rash then its worth seeing the health visitor. Get her to note down instructions in the little red book which you can then photocopy and give to the nursery.

Op which nappies do you use?
We have exactly same probs with ds but have found as he's got older and teething made issue worse the pampers baby dry hugely improve things (active fit etc not nearly as good)
Just wondered if they provide the nappies whether it's a cheap brand one not suited to sensitive skin?
Btw my nursery v quick to ask for cream etc & comment on redness etc

Eh - cotton wool is revolting to use, ReallyTired?! Matter of taste / custom surely: I like cotton wool much better than wipes generally, and especially for cleaning up poo!