To chase those who haven't rsvp'd to party

[Dizzydalek]

I am having a 4th birthday party for DC,first one I have ever done so this is all new to me. Still waiting on 14 to get back to me (the rsvp date was yesterday).AIBU to ask nursery staff if they could ask the parents of those that haven't replied if their child is coming? Or I could write a little reminder note for each parent and pop my contact details on again,and nursery staff could put it in the child's draw? What do you think is best? There is potentially 3 that I might be able to ask myself at drop off/pick up time,but I don't know any of the others. 14 is quite a few children not to know if they are coming or not!!

YABU to expect the nursery to chase parents up for you.

I'd imagine they wouldn't have much of an issue with you popping a note into the trays, though.

FTR, party RSVPs are the bane of most parents lives. I hope you hear back from some of the non-repliers.

I wouldn't bother the Nursery staff

When's the party?

do you not realise this is the great guessing game of childrens parties.. ie how many will arrive.. I wouldn't do anything tbh - do you really need to know, will it make any difference to your arrangements etc

I always do reminders just before the party for those I haven't heard from - mostly because I myself am AWFUL at remembering to RSVP and need to be reminded!

I just say something along the lines of "Just a reminder that Acorn's party is at 12pm on Saturday, and we would love to see you there! Let me know if you will be able to make it!"

The party is in 2 week,venue needs to know numbers a week before(they are providing food).So I have given myself a week to chase those who havn't replied,I expected I would have this problem,but thought it would be 4 or 5 not 14!! Is it safe to assume those who don't contact me after the reminder will not turn up?

Sadly it seems perfectly acceptable to some rude bastards parents not to bother to RSVP. Tis bloody annoying.

YANBU to chase, but it is quite a lot of work for you to expect the nursery staff to do it I'm afraid

No, some will turn up who never got back to you, some who got back to you with a yes won't turn up, some will turn up who said they wouldn't, etc.

Welcome to the minefield of birthday parties.

Yes, I would reckon so Dizzydalek. Although if a couple do turn up they can generally be squeezed in - most party places are quite understanding.

You need to do it in person surely you just find the parents at drop off and ask them (didn't use a nursery but this is what we do at school). Don't trouble the staff its nothing to do with them they have enough to do without arranging your social events!

I have a toddler party next week, all the children invited are relatives. I haven't had one RSVP. We have had this every year with ds1 as well, when I chase they say they "don't know", it makes it impossible to organise anything.

Kerala Unfortunately the children at nursery start and finish at different times.I would rather ask them myself but I will only see about 3 of the parents, and that's if I'm lucky.

Oh - have no experience of this. I only invited friends DC to parties when mine were tiny if I didn't know the parents they didn't get an invite.

I wouldn't ask nursery staff to ask parents but i'm guessing if they put the initial invitations in the children's drawers they may not mind putting a reminder in for you. Kids parties are terrible for this as some parents are downright rude.