To hold DS to his word?

[Voidka]

DS is 11.

Yesterday he got a call from a friend who invited him to go to the fun pool with him and his Mum. I said that he would go if he wanted but we would still be going tomorrow (meaning today) as usual. We go swimming every Saturday as a family and while DS2 has his special swimming lesson, DD, DS1, DH and I swim in the other pool. He said that was fine.

This morning we have had tantrums because he doesnt want to go swimming again. DH thinks we should leave him with someone else while we go, but I feel that he promised he would go, and he should start to learn to stick to his word.

We cant leave him at home on his own as he isnt sensible enough (he has AS).

YANBU

Otherwise he will learn that he can make promises he doesn't intend to keep in order to get his own way.

How does his AS affect his ability to understand keeping his word?

He understands needing to keep it I think. We went through the same thing about a year ago when he said he wanted to go out for the day with my Mum (who drove up for 2 hours to get him) then decided he didnt want to. We had a big chat about it then and from then on he has been good at doing things he says he will.

Sounds like you need to be consistent about keeping his word, then. Let him sit on side & kick his legs in water if that's all he wants. Not that much effort, is it?

Hmm its a difficult one, he should stick to his word but if his attitude is going to ruin the swimming for the rest of the family then maybe you should leave him with someone else if you can, I understand wanting to stick to your principal but honestly I would pick my battles and let this one go, it's not that important that he goes swimming today and he will ruin it for DD and DS2.

YANBU.

How miserable is it possible to stay while at a swimming pool? please report back

Take him . If he doesn't want to swim can he sit on the side ?