To think my cousin is very foolish

[Amber76]

My cousin had her first baby last December by emergency c-section due to problems with a low lying placenta - baby was born at 33 weeks and seems to be fine now. She has now announced that she is two months pregnant - and this was planned. So, she got pregant less than 2 months after having a premature baby - new baby due in early November. She wanted 2 babies before she was 40 and doesn't seem to care about any advice regarding waiting 12 months before trying again.
I think she is putting this new baby and herself at massive risk. Am I wrong? Surely the section scar won't have healed sufficiently to carry another pregnancy so quickly?

It does seem very quick - but she's an adult, and up to her to make her own decisions (presumably together with her DP!). Maybe she was concerned about her age, and leaving it too long?

Hope all goes well for her.

It's risky and not something I would do but it's her body to do it with. I hope it works out well for her.

Yes, of course she is but you know that and she will have been/will receive plenty of lectures from HCPs on the inadvisability of her choice. Unless she is completely dippy, she will also be aware of the risks she is taking.

However, you also need to support her. This pregnancy may be a rough ride and another happy ending may not be quite so straightforward. Show her your concern and love and keep your fingers crossed. It wasn't a rational decision (but then I'm not sure having children is ever an entirely rational idea )

If she's getting close to 40 it might be a correct call that the increased risk of being older is greater than the risk associated to being pregnant again.

What exactly is the risk ? Personally, I'd never heard the "waiting 12 months" thing - is it specific to cesearean birth ?

It's the risk of the scar rupturing, I was told 2 years though not one.

Ahh but did she announce her 'plans' before or after the pregnancy?

Some people just won't admit they fell pregnant by accident (not saying she did..but she might have) and prefer to claim the baby was planned or the condom broke etc.

Either way, she's pregnant now and will need all the support she can get I imagine.

I suspect it wasn't planned, and is saving face.

She's either very brave, are made a mistake.

@Fondlewithcare. Ah. I see. Just out of interest, what is the percentage risk of scar rupturing with early pregnancy ? Because a 40 year old who waits an extra 2 years almost doubles her risk of Down's syndrome and sees the risk of miscarriage go up by a scary amount.

YANBU but what can you do? It's done now fingers crossed and mouth closed methinks

Crazy, I'd have stuck with one child myself! But I'm a planner. What does her doctor say? Assume she's acting on doctor's advice.
After my EMCS my midwife said to wait two years before trying again. I did have a huge scar though, bigger than most.

I've had three CS's- my youngest two are close together and my obstetrician said the scar is as healed as its ever going to be three months after the original section, so no benefit to waiting any longer than that (scar-healing wise).
My mum was told to wait two years after having her first thru EMCS and waited only a few months and had VB no problems.
I would say if she has healed without any problems age would be a more worrying factor for me and i can see why she hasn't waited long.

It was definitely planned - she used to say it while she was pregnant with the first one that she was going to start trying as soon as possible. We're not close at all and I wouldn't talk to her about it but I think it was such a selfish thing to do. I think, given her history, that there is a high chance of this baby being born prematurely. I had placenta previa myself and I know the risks associated with it - she has an increased chance of this and so many other complications given the fact that her c section scar is so recent.
Apparently her doctor just said "it's done now and we'll keep a close eye on you". What else can he say? I wonder if some doctors just want to slap silly, irresponsible mothers who put their own interests first instead of the health of the baby?

I'm not sure of the numbers, it's not a massive increase in risk of rupture though. It also increases the risk of a premature delivery and having placenta praevia once means she's at higher risk of that again. It's not ideal and I hope it goes well but you may be right that the risks are lower than the risks associated with her age.

OK, however unwise your cousin may have been, it is her body. And as for wanting to slap pregnant women........

I'm not surprised you are not close.

I hope everything goes well with her pregnancy.

@Amber. And if she waits then she has an increased risk of (long scary list of things more likely to happen to older women in pregnancy, particularly those over 40).

Which of those increased risks is greater? I have no clue. Do you?

So you want to slap a pregnant women over something that is really none of your business.

Right.

Sorry you're actually suggesting that a medically qualified professional doctor should slap a pregnant woman.

There are risks to having a baby quickly after a c-section, but there are risks to having a baby as an older mother too. Should the Dr be slapping anyone who isn't a healthy 25 year old?

I didn't know about waiting a year or two. Maybe she didn't either. I fell pregnant 8 months after my csection. Sadly I lost it but when I asked if it was too soon i was told no. Presumably she will be able to have a planned section this time so hopefully risk of rupture will be low.

i was told to wait 6 months after the first two (over a decade ago) and 12 months after the third

i am sure she will be fine anyway

Nobody ever mentioned waiting before another pregnancy after my emcs, if she is nearing 40 she really doesn't have time to wait. The risk of never being able to get pregnant again is probably far greater than any risk from being pregnant so recently after a emcs.

she may well have had the second close together due to shock and wanted to get another over and done with. It sounds very traumatic what she went through, try not to judge her so much.