To think its sometimes better to just say nothing...

[Fedupateaster]

twice this weekend I've spoken out when friends family have said or done something that I feel is out of order or unfair. I thought I would feel better for saying how I feel and being honest.

However, the reality is I feel like a moaner and now have a strained relationship with my good friend, which may take some to heal.

AIBU to think that it's better to inwardly moan but smile and say nothing?

Well it very much depends on what's been said or done. But generally I do try to keep just bite my lip for the sake of harmony.

Depends on what it is.

Examples:
If it is something like you hate the hair cut they just got or are considering... Say nothing

If they are being mean/ racist etc always say something

Everybody being honest with each other all teh time is a recipe for disharmony :)

I think one learns to pick one's battles.

Depends on what was said and reasons.

If someone asks if their bum looks big - the answer is always 'no'

But if someone goes off on one being racist/homophobic/disablist then they deserve a slap.

As everybody else said, it very much depends on what was said. Bigotry or complete rudeness shouldn't be allowed to go unchallenged but inconsequential things or something where honesty would be hurtful can be let go.

It was more just being honest. My friend was being really off with me when I told her about a holiday we had booked and more or less said 'how can you afford that and I can't' - they (her and DH) collectively earn a lot more than DP and I but we spend less, prioritise different things etc. I am a good economiser/saver.

I would normally let her remarks pass me by, but this time I challenged it - pointed out that her comments were out of order and if she was a good friend she should just be happy for me, instead of turning it into a competition.

Queue huffs and puffs and comments like 'oh, you're touchy', must be PMT. now she's not speaking to me.

She was the one being touchy. You just put her straight. If she can't manage her own money then that's up to her. She should be glad for you.