His family staying

[Bambino81]

My partners mum sister and daughter are coming to stay with us for a week.

I adore his daughter and love when she comes to stay with us. His mum also is no problem, but his sister, omg she's just a nightmare. she just TELLS him when she's coming to stay.

I've not seen her since last year when i went from mine (London) to hers (Manchester) to do her hair, her mums hair and her 4 bridesmaids hair for her wedding. i paid for my own travel and even tho i said she didnt have to pay me i was expecting more then the scabby bunch of half dead flowers she got me from tescos, she never even properly thanked me.

I told my partner after that, that i just didnt like her, shes just not my kind of person and we clash, im not sure if she's aware of it or not and i dont really care.

She told my partner she was coming down with his mum and daughter and he didnt tell me at first cause he knew id hit the roof, when he did tell me, it worked out she'd be down on the date of my driving test, and i hadnt told anyone apart from my partner about it cause i suffer with nerves, so told him that he was going to have to say no to her. He did, and she kicked off, but rearranged anyway.

I feel like a bitch cause she is his sister, but i just cant stand her, she treats my house like her holiday home with personal maid and in house hairdresser (me) My partner HATES conflict and will do anything to avoid it, so i just dont know where to go from here. If it was up to me, i think id just tell her to fuck off, but it would upset my bf alot. he says he feels like hes stuck between me and her, and i dont want him to feel like that so i end up just getting on with it to avoid the dramas.

what would u lot do? sorry this was so long - was kinda nice to vent tho haha.

I would let her come

It's not like you (or he) see her often? It's not a regular occurrence so why the hysteria?

She is his family. You can't exclude just get without losing face and seeming petty, grudge and mean

Imo

And to not expect payment but be that arsey about her not getting you a nicer bunch of flowers is a bit off

And you say she didn't thank you properly... so she did thank you?

You sound a very angry person and I really don't get the vitriol towards her.

You sound very angry and unreasonable.

She thanked you but not in a suitably arse-licky way? And she did get you flowers they were just from Tesco? At least she got you flowers.

She did thank you. She gave you flowers. Fair enough you don't want to wait on house guests - tell your dp to make the tea for his guests. But they're his family and he is entitled to entertain them in his own home. And tbh my family and I tell each other we are coming to visit, we don't wait for invites.

No she didn't say thank u too me, his 9 year old daughter told me she said thank u a month later. I can't stand bad manners specially as I really put myself out to do their hair.

I am sucking it up and letting her come, but to be honest I'd happily not see her again. Lots has gone on between us and I'm always poliet and nice to her, just feel like I've had enough now. I don't know how anyone can be so arrogant...

I don't like the sound of being told that someone is coming to stay family or not. It's rude.

Sounds like it's going to be a long week.

I don't think you can tell your partner who can and can't come to visit him, but at the same time he shouldn't be forcing houseguests on you if you have made it clear you don't like them.

It sound slime it's just a personality clash with you and her, because you haven't said anything specific that she has done wrong. If that's all it is, you should just put up with her for the sake of the man you love, but he he should also know that you are doing something you don't want to for his sake so he should be showing his appreciation of that.

My partner also works self employed so he never takes any time off
So its down to me to look after them and take them out places. This has been going on over 2 years. I loves his mum and daughter and like looking after them, but his sister is so ungrateful. She leaves my house in a tip she doesn't even take out her own dinner plate etc

Why are they staying for so long?

I think you should let her come but on no account let her treat you like a personal maid and don't do her hair. Just say 'sorry I don't have the time'.

However, don't make her uncomfortable and if she's nice to you, definitely be nice back.

Theres no point in holding grudges and lifes so much easier when relatives can be civil and pleasant instead of wasting energy on seething and being angry.

His daughter comes every holiday and I guess his sister just felt like tagging along. She's already said she's skint so either she can't do stuff with us or someone will have to pay for her.

I like ur advice exexe, its easier said then done tho. I booked this week off work to spend time with the kids so she knows I have the time to do it. I think I'm just going to not be as nice as I normally am, like not offer cups of tea all the time and stuff. Maybe I should ask her to make me one lol! I might say I'll do her hair if she takes the kids to the park or something, just to let it hit home that this isn't a free for all.

Its so awkwaaaard!

There must be more to it surely, because you seem to HATE her for what actually seems like nothing much. So, from what youve put id say yabu. She's his sister, so to a degree you will have to suck it up, particularly if this is all shes done.

There's more too it but it all basically boils down to her attitude and ignorance. She's just arrived and has been as nice as pie to me but on her way into the house she saw my new car and said "is this the pile of shit?" To my bf. Prime example of what she's like and in a record time as well - before she's even got into the house.

'Someone will have to pay for her' and she invited herself?

It's sounds like she might be a little envious of you, hence the car comment. She certainly wouldn't have invited herself if she didn't like you. The nicer you are the harder it will be for her to be a bitch. Feel your pain tho!