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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put my 11 year old on the train alone

50 replies

olgafromthevolga · 09/04/2012 10:00

Ds is going to spend a few days with his grandma and I am considering putting him on the train alone to go there. It is one and a half hours with 2 stops and she will collect him at the other end. He is a very sensible boy and is happy to do it, but I am not sure whether it is reasonable or not.

OP posts:
Flisspaps · 09/04/2012 10:01

YANBU.

Plenty big enough to go on the train by himself, especially as he's being seen off and met at the other end!

ClaireAll · 09/04/2012 10:01

Can't see the problem.

LindyHemming · 09/04/2012 10:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

scurryfunge · 09/04/2012 10:02

So long as he knows what to do if there are delays or cancellation, it should fine.

Chundle · 09/04/2012 10:02

I was put on a flight from edinburgh to London at age 11 on my own. I think he's old enough, just pack him up lots of food stuff to occupy him and maybe a pay as you go fone!

viktoria · 09/04/2012 10:03

YANBU - presumably your Ds goes to school by himself. It's good for children to have some independence.

JambalayaCodfishPie · 09/04/2012 10:03

11year old, as in Yr6 at primary, or 11year old Yr7 at secondary?

I think confidence wise there would be a massive difference.

What is the journey usually like? Is it a quieter local line, or a mainline route where they could potentially spend the journey surrounded by a pissed up stag do?

mrspnut · 09/04/2012 10:03

My DD1 started doing this when she was 11, I put her on the train at Newark and her grandparents collect her at Stevenage. I have always booked her a first class ticket because it is less crowded and she gets free food and drink brought to her seat.

FallenCaryatid · 09/04/2012 10:04

No changes?
Phone and food. I used to come home from boarding school unaccompanied other than by my younger sister every 6/8 weeks at that age, with no mobiles available,

RandomMess · 09/04/2012 10:05

Give him a mobile phone and he'll be fine.

Does he have much luggage?

Littleplasticpeople · 09/04/2012 10:05

Absolutely fine, I'd be worried if a (NT) 11 year old couldn't cope with this.

FamiliesShareGerms · 09/04/2012 10:06

Depends on the kid - if they're happy to go it alone, why not? But if they are anxious about it, then not yet.

Original poster
olgafromthevolga · 09/04/2012 10:17

He is Yr 6 at primary and is pretty confident. Small rucksack and no changes. I think he will be fine but First class is a good idea.

OP posts:
CecilyP · 09/04/2012 10:23

He should be fine with no changes and being met at the other end. With a mobile phone, should there be any delays, there should be no problems at all.

ToryLovell · 09/04/2012 10:25

Seems fine to me

GinPalace · 09/04/2012 10:25

I did this at his age from Manchester to London.

Put on at one end and picked up at the other - no problem! Unless he is likely to do something random like get off at the wrong stop I can't see an issue.

I thought it was a great adventure and enjoyed the (albeit illusory) sense of independence it gave me.

Lueji · 09/04/2012 10:26

YANBU.

It seems fine to me.

Nancy66 · 09/04/2012 10:27

Most important thing is that the child is happy to do the journey alone - as yours is then, yes, sounds perfectly reasonable to me.

TidyDancer · 09/04/2012 10:29

If he's a sensible boy and there are no changes for him to deal with, then arm him with a phone and snacks and he'll be fine!

TidyDancer · 09/04/2012 10:30

Do make sure someone is able to meet him at the platform at the other end though, not just in the general area.

marriedinwhite · 09/04/2012 10:32

I used to be put on the train at the age of 8 (hour and three quarters) and collected at Victoria by my grandmother. Was in the days of buffet and restaurant cars though and my mother used to tip the steward to keep an eye on me and I used to sit on a table in the restaurant car.

DS did the same journey from about 12. No restaurant cars or guards any more though! But the other way round, ie starting from London. We were mindful though to put him on a busy train, ie at 5ish so catching the early commuters because the line can be a lonely one in the middle of the day.

BusinessTrills · 09/04/2012 10:33

YANBU at all, as long as he is not unusually sensitive worried about it.

lunamoon · 09/04/2012 12:44

Yes let him do it.

moomoo1967 · 09/04/2012 12:48

I would never do this, I know from experience that there are too many weirdo's on the train. Its not like a flight where the airline would know exactly who is on the train. Plus there are the changes, nope just wouldn't do it

Nancy66 · 09/04/2012 12:51

Moomoo - there are no changes, OP says that clearly.

I wouldn't put him in first class though as others have suggested - it will be very quiet - i'd keep him where it's busy.