Db and SiL and my 2 Dnephews (7,5) came around today for a pop in visit.
My Dnephews aren't very well behaved and Db and SiL just tend to shrug it off. Anyway both boys ran in screaming at each other. They ran straight to my Dds easter egg tower (she has four that she has made into a tower because apparently 'it looks cool' [buhmm] ) Dn1 tried to kick it down but we caught him and I told him no. They went upstairs to play with my Dcs.
The adults went into the dining room and Db and SiL told us that we are going to thiers for lunch, 12 tomorrow SiL was cooking lamb. They didn't ask just assumed. We said that we would think about it. They pulled a 'cats bum face'.
The problem being that they don't clean , and their cats and dogs walk over everything and the let theis rabbits poo on the carpets and its just not nice at all and I wouldn't eat there and I really don't want my Dcs eating there. However they didn't leave us a choice and me and Dh kept trying to say No and said we had plans. They just said cancle them. So we said we would call on Saturday with an answer.
Dn1 came down asked for a drink, we gave it too him and Db told him to drink it in the living room and SiL went with him to check the weather.
Dh went in to give SiL a cup of tea, and Dn1 had eaten Dds easter egg and was trying to open another one. Dh shouted at him ask SiL why she let him do it. She just shurged said 'Oh he didn't mean too'. Dh asked her to pay for them and she grumped and sulked handed over her fiver in the end. Her and Db left.
Me and Dh talked thought we should go round there but still didn't want to eat so I rang Db asked would it be okay for us to not have lunch there but to come round after so we could still see each other. He said yes that would be good, around 2 then.
Around 7 my step-dad rang up and started shouting at Dh. When he calmed down he explained that Db had asked my mum to the lunch weeks ago and they had said yes on the understanding that I wouldn't be there. Db didn't tell me that our mum would be there either. Anyway mum didn't want to go if I came.
(Background- me and my mum fell out, shes never been bothered with me and doesn't like my Dh etc. She did some really horrid stuff and is now not hiding her 'hatred' of me)
I called Db asked was mum coming he said yes, she called him on the mobile at the same time, saying I'd been awful to her over the phone she couldn't have lunch with me. Db said I'd be there later so it was fine and she could see her DGC again as she hasn't seen my Dcs for a few months. She said fine as long as she didn't have to talk to me an Dh.
I really really don't want to go. I don't want to spend the afternoon with my mum making bitchy comments and I know that she will have presents for all the kids except my Ds or exept my Dcs and she will bring them all out as we get there.
Dh says he will back me up on what I want to do, he didn't want to go anyway and I know he will hate going now. But he says it's my choice.
I have no idea if I should go, or how to say I'm not going if I don't go
So AIBU to just not go and spend the day here with Dh and the DCs.?