freeloading bloody bugger or not?

[LostMyIdentityAlongTheWay]

Planning to take brood to the cinema. Pirates Looks awful and each ticket will cost a fiver but my three kids REALLY want to go. Which is fine but the two eldest now want to invite friends. Seeing as I seem to be the only mum who takes various kids plus friends to soft play, ice creams, cinemas.... And other parents only ever have them round to play, am I just being taken for a ride? Am starting to think it's quite cheeky, especially one nun who always wants her kids in, but NEVER reciprocates. She knows we're off thus afternoon and has redress asking whether eldest is free...
Holidays cost a fortune and 8'm sick of stumping up for otherd, money is SO tight atm.

Seems fair enough to let them go with you if you are going anyway. I can't believe that anyone would expect you to pay. Make it absolutely clear that they need to pay for their ticket and any drinks and snacks that they wish to consume.

Pirates is very good, and I didn't even go with or because of kids!

If I had room in the car and the child in question was well behaved, I wouldn't mind taking them, but only if the parents took a reasonably equal share in having my DC to play or were paying for the trip (meaning ticket, drink and food).

YANBU to say no if the above is not the case. I know today has been derailed now, but probably best to take that stand in the future!

Sorry if was unclear... I hadn't invited her son, she knew wwhere we were going to and tried to get her son along. And she never pays for anything.
I have wimped and arranged for this boy, who is actually rather super, to come over next week. God this has stressed me out really. I am grateful for your advice, though. I gi think I need to toughen up a bit though...!
Off to eat shedloads of popcorn now to make myself feel better! Sodding HTC typos...sorry.

The texts are a bit confusing - she initially asked if her eldest was 'free' as in she didn't need to pay for his ticket, and then said he couldn't come when you said he did have to? . How is this your fault?

She won't be offended believe me all the freeloaders I know have the hides of rhino's!

Text back "sorry we have family plans today. Xxx could come over to yours tomorrow?"

I interpreted it as asking if the OPs eldest son was free - as in available to play.

Quite sneaky. just happen to see if the kids can get together on a day you know the other parent is taking her children out = get yours along too.

You can just say 'no, he's not free today,' and take them without saying anything else. It is OK to spend time with your children without tag-a-longs.

The only time I would ever consider paying for anyone's else's kids is if it is one of my dc birthdays and they are havin a cinema party, and I always take my own snacks, can't really see the problem tbh.

I only found out recently that the local rule is guests pay for themselves unless it's a birthday event. So naturally I haven't sent money along with my lot ever, previously (oops). I have always insisted on paying for guests & thought that was the done thing (but it's not). Eejit=me. Best not to assume, best to always ask & be direct about it.