to hate perfume? in anything?

[Anna1976]

I just don't get the need for it. You can be chic and glam without smelling like civet pee and artificial violets. Stuff can be clean without smelling of vile air freshener or pot pourri.

What would be wrong with just smelling like washed clothes, washed hair, and some plain soap?

Several of my students wear perfume so strong that my eyes water and I get a headache just being in the same lab as them. It's the female version of Lynx for teenage boys (which I don't get either).

OK I am an extreme case because it gives me severe migraines. I'm currently awake trying not to throw up after spending the afternoon with the two perfume-clad students.

Why do they torture me thus? Why?

Well they're not going to change for you. The only 'thing' you can change is you and your response to it - get some antihistamines and see a doctor about migraines if you think you need to.

Sorry, perfume-lover here...

YANBU. IMO of someone chooses to wear scent it should be discreet that only those very close can smell it. Smell is very emotive and I feel intruded upon when I smell someone walk by. Get out of my personal space!

I hate any artificial scent in cleaning products, deodorant, laundry soap - whatever! If someone or something is really clean it does not need to be masked by fake smell.

Hideous.

The PP is unreasonable. Plenty of workplaces are now scent free zones. OP you should talk to someone in health and safety and ask them to implement a policy. You could get your doctor to back you up.

Jnice -thanks for the support - one of my workplaces is scent-free, the other one isn't... I agree re all those scents and masking with fake smell.
Honestly i get to smell more gore, pee and poo than a lot of people (with the ...minor exception of parents changing nappies) and I'd rather smell that, unadulterated, than that masked with eau de plastic.

lyingWitchIntheWardrobe - point taken, you like it, I was kind of asking for that response - antihistamines aren't any use btw. and i have been seeing doctors for migraines since about age 8. Do you have any sympathy for the point of view that perfume worn at "normal" levels is a major problem for some people, who can't escape it because other people say "it's my right, I'm not harming anyone, I like it?". The number of people for which it is a major problem is tiny. But for those people - it looks like such an easy problem to solve if only the world would listen!

I also love perfume but would gladly go without if it made my colleague ill ..YANBU at all

I enjoy wearing perfume but only wear a bit. I have a friend who is allergic to most perfumes so I don't wear any when seeing him.

You could ask the students not to wear it when they come and see you.

Well I love perfume. I am fascinated by the classic brands and their history and love trawling perfume counters.

However, day to day I usually wear a perfume oil which is fairly subtle. If I worked in close proximity with someone I wouldn't drench myself in anything that smelt strongly.

YANBU if it gives you migraines- speak to someone at work about a no scent zone whilst in the lab.

However YABU if you don't like anyone wearing it or you are attributing a sense of entitlement to innocent perfume wearers passing you in the street.

The perfume industry isn't going anywhere so it's you who will have to adapt I'm afraid.

YANBU. I have a severely asthmatic friend who is very badly affected by perfumes, air fresheners etc. Cleaning in their house is find using vinegar and tea tree oil as kitchen cleaners have the same effects.

I think it's a bit patronising to suggest anti-histamines - I'm sure that you will have tried those types of solutions already. In Jill's case, anti-histamines aggravate her asthma too.

I don't think it would be unreasonable to ask people to go perfume-free when they see you. Most will understand, I'm sure.

I love perfume (on myself) but would gladly not wear it if a friend asked me not to. I am picky about the smell of cleaning products but some of them I buy specifically for the smell (method grapefruit for surfaces, method almond oil for floors etc)

I haven't heard of workplaces being scent free. Is this in the UK? In healthcare or other professions? I find a quick squirt of perfume gives me confidence (along with lipstick, high shoes, work clothes etc) and didn't think about people being allergic. Can you not mention to your students as I would gladly refrain in the workplace if it was giving offence?

Anna... Yes, I really do have sympathy for you. One of my friends was telling me about a B&B in Canada where they have a zero-fragrance rule... I was absolutely agog and have vowed never to go near it, they'd have me arrested!

Realistically, what can you do? What is possible for your workplace to implement that will make it ok for you? When you said 'Lynx', I thought of teen boys and thought, "good luck prising them from those precious aerosols".

I think (and I'm guilty of this too) that people use too much fragrance because they personally can't smell it on themselves so think they need more, which makes the problem worse for you.

Sending you 'fragrance-free'

When I was pregnant with DC1, I shared an office with a colleague who wore a very expensive brand of perfume with vanilla undertones that just turned my stomach, but I couldn't say anything, as I hadn't told anyone at that stage I was pregnant!

Since that pregnancy I've not been able to wear scented deodorant - unscented deodorant can sometimes be difficult to find! - and I'm particularly sensitive to artificial scents in cleaning products. OP - you have my sympathy.

I hate perfumes too, always use unscented products myself when possible. Strong scents give me a headache, and I get an unpleasant 'taste' and feel when I breathe them. Wearing perfume in an enclosed space with other people seems very intrusive to me, like someone playing loud music or flashing bright lights in your eyes.

I realise I'm in a minority though and don't really expect everyone to change their behaviour for my preferences, and fortunately it isn't usually an issue for me at work. I do like the idea of scent-free workplaces though!

Yanbu I once had to ask one of my staff to stop wearing a particular perfume as it was so strong and so overpowering that it gave me awful headaches.
She was fine about it.
I also hated people picking up ds when he was a baby and then getting him back stinking of their perfume. Yeuch.

YANBU to hate people wearing too much perfume, but you can't expect no perfume in anything ever. For a start, saying that you would like to smell of just-washed laundry is a bit odd. Because laundry products all contain fragrances of some sorts, even the more natural or Eco ones. Without them, they would smell horrible, honestly you wouldn't like your washing to smell of surfactants. Ditto soap.
Most products that claim to be unscented actually do contain a masking fragrance, or they get around it by including some sort of "extract" which actually smells nice, eg an essential oil. Tis still a fragrance.

Oh, poor you.

I don't think a lot of people understand that perfume can be quite a serious allergy. My mum has an allergy to some of the fixitives in perfume and it's nothing too serious, 'just' induces bad headaches and sinus trouble. But her GP knows people who have landed in A&E struggling to breathe.

Spagbo - I think the OP probably doesn't mean essential oils? You can get nasty reactions to neat essential oils on the skin, but other than that it is pretty rare for them to cause allergic reactions at the smell - they really are a different kettle of fish IMO.

Btw - having just been through the airport, something that really annoyed me was the willingness of people trying to sell perfume to just squirt it in the air in front of people. I really think that's disgusting and bad manners, and the steward on my plane immediately told a woman she must not spray the perfume she'd just bought while in the plane as it was not fair on other passengers to make them sit in the fumes.

I do wear perfume and felt a bit guilty when he made that point, and another time I will think again and leave it off when I'm going to be in an enclosed space with other people for a long time.

You're right that most essential oils (and flowers, except jasmine) are fine - it's all the other stuff...

Most reactions like this resulting in headache (as opposed to the asthma ones) aren't IgE-mediated (allergies), they're more to do with an over-active pain response called central sensitization, that is (unclearly) probably related somehow to migraines, fibromyalgia, gulf war syndrome, multiple chemical sensitivity, ME/CFS kinds of thing.

It can be massively debilitating - I feel really sorry for anyone who for example has a stroppy teenager who can't be parted from the pongy body lotion, hairspray, perfume etc and doesn't give a flying fig about their housemate's problem.

Thanks for the responses - I might have a quiet chat to those students since I'm hardly feeling like an effective lecturer today...

BTW I'm not attributing a sense of entitlement at all, but it does seem to be difficult to get some people (eg my mother and sister) to understand that I'm not actually choosing to have a migraine that has me up all night vomiting, simply to prove some kind of smelly hairy-armpitted hairy-legged feminist point that i don't like Issey Miyake or Charlie or whatever the hell it is this week...

I probably come across as really not understanding people whose identity is tied up in ultra-femininity. Probably because I'm staring in fascination and desperately trying not to make it look like i'm scrutinizing them and wondering how on earth their identity developed like that and what htey do in situations where they have to be less like that... and meanwhile developing a headache because of the body lotions...

Anna, you may not have a sense of entitlement, but you have an appalling attitude. Women (and men) who wear scent are not people whose "identities are tied up in ultra-feminity". As to your scrutiny as to "how they developed like that", you are making massive assumptions that are almost certainly wrong, insulting, and hysterical.

Look, I love wearing subtle, lovely scent. You have a physical reaction to some perfume, which I sympathise with. If I knew my scent (which you'd have to get real close to me to notice) bothered you, I'd stop wearing it immediately and without question.

Why not simply ask your students to do so?

I was with you OP until your last post!
patronising much?

I don;t like wearing perfume, I don;t react or anything, I just don'tlike it. And the price of some of them! I read somewhere that couture houses and the like make more money on perfume thanon their clothes/handbags etc.

And i don;t like the idea of someone kissing my neck if i've sprayed scent on it - it would probaby make me taste acetone-y or acidic.

Well OP you've just lost a lot of ground by insulting and patronising people who like wearing perfume.

Save your bile for something seriously offensive and heinous.

Serious foot in mouth there. I have realised how that came scross and apologise unreservedly. What i was trying to say is that is how i respond to prople who hysterically refuse to think that anyone could have a valid point that not wearing perfume could be ok or helpful. Sorry to those who were offended- i am not saying that perfume makes you automatically ... anyyhing at all... (particularly not ultrafeminine). I was saying i do not get people who see perfume as such a stronv part of their identity that they disdain people who don't wear it. ( cringe).

I can't stand "smelling". Essential oils are fine, I use teatree showergel/shampoo but unscented anything else. I totally agree with you OP.

A friend of mine drenched herself in her special wedding perfume... seriously? You spent £60 on wedding perfume? I hate it when I can smell someone's perfume on the underground. Yuk, if you think a certain smell is lovely then I think it should be for you and your dp, not someone sitting opposite you on the train.