DH stormed out - who's bu?

[jojane]

This week has been quite busy and we didn't get to do our usual weekend tidy and clean so started the week on the wrong foot. I have been really tired, kids being a pain in the butt. Yesterday DH came home and house was a mess. E didn't say anything but stayed in study all night while I went to bed early as couldn't keep eyes open, been out most of today and since I have been home kids been a nightmare, dd fell over and wouldn't stop crying about it, eldest DH habit meltdown and punched me in the face and 1 year old hasn't had a nap today so grumpy and clingy. They created havoc whilst I cooked tea do puzzles and cards etc all over living room, DH came go e as I was dishing up tea and started moaning and stripping so I told him to pee off So he has stormed out to his dads and said he isn't coming back.
Who's being unreasonable? Should I ave made more of an effort to tidy up or should be be more understanding of how much chaos 3 children 5 and under can cause?
It is a recurring thing (not the storming out that's never happened before) but the coming home to a mess. He used to work shifts and come home at 8 so kids were bathed and fed and tidied up but now he comes home at 6 which is chaos hour with cooking tea, tired stroppy kids etc

And, another thing! You normally do a weekend tidy and clean. So do we. If everything got left for the work week and I was supposed to do it I would be a little suspicious that this was going to turn into the 'normal' way things were going to be run. I wonder if your DH wants this to happen. He wants to let the weekends become fun and all the grunt work falls to you during the week. Maybe that is why he overreacted.

I don't think DH married me because I was brilliant at tidying.

Thanks feel a bit better now
I have to say he does help out with housework and normally. Aths the kids while I tidy the kitchen after tea or vice versa so isn't a 'me work, wife clean' sort of blokes but he just doesn't seem to understand that I HAVE normally tired and cleaned during the day but while I am cooking in the kitchen the kids will cause chaos in the lounge.
Because he normall does help out a lot I was starting to wonder if I was being unreasonable and should be making more effort.

I think part of his grumpiness is due to the fact that sex is only about once a fortnight at the moment. I am too tired and stressed out by the time the kids go to bed. And mornings when I am in the mood the kids wake up and are too young to amuse themselves for too long, I work several evenings inc weekends. Plus just recently stopped breast feeding and went on pill so libido is none exsistent.

well acting like a big kid isn't going to turn you on is it now - so better tell him that big fact Otherwise sex will go out the window for good and that is not surely what you want

He's hardly helping you regain your libido by acting like a big kid is he? I don't think you were being U at all. Just frazzled by 3 children under 5 at precisely the time of the evening when everyone is likely to be tired. Including you. So rather than flouncing, a spot of help from him would have been more useful.

I don't want to make light of things but do have to say that the autocorrect fail had me tittering though DH came go e as I was dishing up tea and started moaning and stripping

Il never forget the day dp arrived home and asked me what I'd been doing all day. I swear to god I was going to leave for a day and see how he coped!!

oh my goodness, it is amazing what chaos they cause whilst you are cooking.

Don't stay on the pill if it is affecting your libido.